Today at lunch time, I went down to the foodcourt as usual, with a couple of co-workers. We were standing in a circle trying to decide between Manchu Wok and Jimmy the Greek, when a man walked past us. It was Brian Williams! I recognized him right away, and said it out loud, "Hey, that's Brian Williams!" and the two of them said "who?!".

Anyway, then Brian turned around and look at me, and he said "Hi" to me, and I said "Hi" back to him. That was my brief encounter with a celebrity today. Hehe..

For those of you who don't know, Brian Williams is a sportscaster for CBC. Probably Ron Maclean and Don Cherry are more well known, but when it comes to the bigger, more important broadcasts, CBC goes with Brian Williams. He has done numerous broadcasts, most notably being the lead caster for the Olympics. I have a clip of Vince Carter when he jumped over Frederick Weis for a dunk, and the guy doing the commentating for the clip is Brian Williams.

I dunno, I guess I shouldn't make a big deal out of it other than it was kinda cool to have seen him, and to have recognized him, as a big sports fan. He wasn't as big as thought he'd be. He's actually much smaller than I though. I guess because he normally wear a suit, he looked smaller. He's also older than I thought, but I guess these guys get pretty good make-up before the shows. If anyone cares, he got his lunch at Subway. I didn't catch what he ordered, since I think that'd be borderline stalker-like information. Heh.

Not much else happened today, I continue to write test cases for the system at work. I'll be leading the user acceptance testing team. I'm slowly learning what that's going to entail, including training users how to use the system, I'll have also have to report to developers on specific bugs, and evaluating which ones are actually worth fixing, etc. It's a big responsibility, but also a great opportunity for me.

My dad's dehumidifier is fixed now, one of my co-workers came to my house to have a look at it. It was actually a pretty simple fix. I feel pretty stupid that I didn't figure it out myself...

A coupla days ago someone asked me about where my name 'eBrian' came from, and if it had any special meaning. What defines eBrian?

Why eBrian? Because I felt like it. There was all that e-business stuff going around at the time, and there was e-mail, which has now turned into just one word "email". So eBrian just made sense.

But what defines eBrian? In my last year of CCF, they gave me a glass with a word engraved on it that they felt best described me. The word was "joy". I think what defines eBrian is joy. That and my obsession with anything related with computers. Pure unexplainable joy. Joy that sometimes doesn't make sense. I think that lately with the craziness that's been going on around me I've forgotten how to feel that sense of joy that I've had before.

I miss that, and it's come back to me in the last few days.

I remember one time in Ottawa, I was standing outside waiting for the bus, and it started to rain. It actually started pouring, and I was getting drenched. But I was laughing.. out loud. I think that's kinda weird now that I think of it.. but anyway, I miss finding joy in those types of things.


Anyway.. yesterday after work I met with my dad's friend Tony, who helped me re-activate the alarm for our house (that's right, to all you who lended me your fans.. they could've been stolen easily!). Then I went to pick up Kenric from work, and we headed to the dealership to get my tire fixed.

These guys are unbelievable. I kept asking them how long it would take, they said 20-30 minutes. Yet, we were there for approximately 1.5 hours. Even when they finally drove my car into the garage, I saw it being hoisted up and no one worked on it for 10 minutes! And get this, it costed over $200 for the whole sha-bang. The tire was $160!! Shocking, considering the chinese autoshop quoted me $110. Doh..

The tire fixing took so long that it cut into the beginning of Monster, so we didn't even bother to go see it. Instead we targeted Girl with a Pearl Earring (Scarlett!!). But we ended up missing that one too, because the food came a bit too slow at the (something) & Firkin.

But all in all it was a fun night, I finally got to drive on the highway, which I've missed a lot.

I love God. I'm so alone and yet, I'm so not alone. God is so great.

Today I had a chance to catch up with Trevor, an old friend of mine from Mac. Praise God that he's back to attending church again, and that his spiritual walk is building up again. He has been attending a church in Irvine, California called New Song Church. They use a motto C (cubed). Christ, Community, Cause. Here's their site.

Anyway, I love it when churches post their sermons so I'm listening to them now. I like the way they're organized by series. If I could only find a way to save this stuff so I can put it on a cd..

Trev was telling me how Michael Chang went to his church to speak once, and he got an autographed tennis ball that says: "Jesus loves you. MChang." Pretty cool!

I know it's old, but every time I see this thing it really cracks me up..

If you have a spare fan or more, please call me. I need to borrow as many fans as possible, I'm hoping for 30-40 of them, to help dry my basement. If I wreck your fan, I'll buy you new one. But for now, I just need as many as possible. Thanks.

My dad and I went over the pictures (Yahoo Messenger's voice capabilities are so unreliable!!) and it appears that there is a chance we can salvage more than what the contractors predicted. I went over to check it out. Most of the walls are still wet. Drywall gets all soft when its wet.

My old bedroom is in good shape, it will probably just need a repaint and the ceiling will need to be re-stucco'd. The main room is in pretty bad shape. All of the exterior walls are fairly wet, although it appears the insulation behind the walls are still dry, because the vapor barriers reach all the way to the ceiling. I guess there's moisture between the plastic and the wall that keeps the walls wet.

The laundry room got the worst of it, every wall in there is wet. Right now I have the 1 fan we own blowing in there. Too bad, if I'd known that room was in such bad shape I would've had the contractors' fans blowing in there more. My dad wants to throw out the carpet, so it was a waste to have the fans blowing the carpet. Oh well..

My old washroom is only bad on the walls that it shares with the laundry room. Upstairs, wherever there are baseboards that are warped, the walls just above them are wet. But not too wet. Those walls should all be salvageable.

Every time I go to that place I feel so heartbroken. I only lived there about 8 years, but it's still saddening to see it in that shape. It almost makes me want to cry.. *almost* 8)

Firstly, don't forget to pray for Alf's interview on the 16th! Don't know Alf? Pray for him anyway!

Next time when I need to find a site I think I'll have to think smaller in terms of the reward.. heh.

I can't sleep in anymore. Perhaps I'm too old to sleep in, perchance my body won't allow it anymore, or it could just be the many things on my mind keeping me from a peaceful rest. I woke up at 8am this morning, despite going to bed after 1am for the past 4 days.

I went to get my tired fixed today, but there was a mixup at the dealership and they didn't have my tire in stock. *tsk*

Does anyone know of a devotional for single men, like if there's one written especially for guys like me. I've come to the realization that I could be in this for the long haul, possibly forever, so perhaps reading a guideline on how God wants us to approach this kind of lifestyle would make it easier for me. Maybe it would help me from going insane as well.

Small group was interesting. I think people forget I can't understand a word of cantonese, because they were going on and on about the how their parents scolded them and nagged them, all in cantonese. All of them were laughing and I was left pretty much trying to slowly decipher what they heck they were saying.

Another thing interesting was the fact they all were hearing the same things from their parents; all in chinese too. My parents rarely ever scolded me in chinese. It was in english, almost all the time. My family is very different from most chinese families. I am a 2nd generation Canadian, just like every other CBC I know, but somehow my parents embraced the Canadian culture while all my friends' parents stuck with their traditions.

My parents, while they still try to instill the chinese traditions, idioms [i hate those things!] in me and my brother, they don't really force it on us. All that really matters to them is that we're happy, and that we live Christ-like lives. I truly believe that among all my friends, I am the luckiest or most blessed from my parents.

And I don't mean "my dad's better than your dad!". I just mean that, my parents are ahead of their time. I can picture many of the people my age who are getting married, they might become like my parents once they have kids. But I've had the advantage of going through it already.

Anyway after small group, they (80% women) cleaned up my kitchen. I had an accident a week ago of spillage over the stove top and they cleaned it up for me, then did my dishes, and then proceeded to clean out my fridge, which was full of rotten food. In my defense, I haven't been able to cook the food I purchased due to just being way too busy lately. Last week it was the flood, the week before I had a number of appointments that kept me busy all weekend, and the week before I was sick. So basically I bought my veggies a month ago, cooked some, but never had a chance to cook the rest. They come in such big bushels, so just it's not fair!

Hmm.. this was a long post. If you are reading this, you have too much time on your hands!

I need to find the chords for the song Breathe by Michelle Branch. In fact, the first person that can find me a site that has all her chords (so far I can only find them for her first album), gets a super-duper prize, like a big *hug*. Or maybe I should make it so that you don't get a hug if you do find me the site, and then I just go around hugging everyone who couldn't. Yeah that's it.. make it a punishment, to make people listen.

Yesterday I discovered that my mp3 player can't handle songs above 128kbps. That sorta sucks..

I checked out the house today. Forgot to check the mailbox again (you idiot!!). We're waiting for a written letter from the insurance company stating their refusal to cover the cost of cleanup and renovation.

My brother got his SAT score back yesterday, and was *disappointed* after getting 93.5% on it. Um yeah.. your future is so over. Poor kid will have to *settle* for Harvard. What a bum..

Let's see.. anything else I haven't covered? Alf's got an interview on the 16th.. please pray for him!

Smallville is one of my favorite shows. One thing I love about the show is the choice of music. Most WB shows have a great selection in music, and Smallville is no exception.

Somehow they always pick the right song at the end to play.

I'm picturing a scene in the near future, of Clark and Lana, patching up their relationship. It's set during an early morning in Clark's loft. Lana is there, looking out into the sky at the sun rising. This is the end of the episode that Lana and Adam break up. 'Collide' by Howie Day starts to play. Perfect. Enter Clark, "Hey.. what are you doing here?". And so on and so forth. As the song hits the crescendo, they hug and become friends again.. Perfect!

It occurred to me that ol' mr.loquacious has been posting a lot lately, my alter ego who abuses this site that I wanted to make more about my daily walk. It's the very reason I changed the name of the site in the first place. It's a reminder that maybe my spiritual walk is slipping slightly. Gosh, I really need to find a new daily devotional.

Today I went over to the house to take pictures of the damage so that my dad can get a better idea of what exactly has happened outside of what I described to him over Yahoo messenger. I took about 40 pics. He hasn't come online yet but once I send them to him, we plan on assessing the damage ourselves. Insurance won't cover it, but that's okay because as my dad put it, God's blessed us well enough that we can afford it if we have to. Anyway the contractor's original estimation may have been a bit overboard.

From my own estimation, it'll cost us maybe 20-25 boards of drywall, and paint, nails, joints, sand paper, drywall compound, insulation, vapor barriers, etc.. There's no way it would cost as much as he told us. The amount he suggested would be enough to rebuild the ENTIRE basement from scratch. If we did it ourselves, that cuts out the labor costs. Again, thank God for the generous and loving friends who have stretched their hands out to offer their help.

After work today I met Kenric for the Raptors game (which we won by a huge margin). I have seen 7 games now this season. The Raptors are 5-2 when I go see their games.

My brother is getting his SAT scores back soon, two days I believe. Personally I'm very excited. Malice is one smart cookie and really regardless of what his score ends up being I know in my heart that he going to be successful with whatever he puts his mind to. It might sound strange but he is an inspiration to me even though he is 9 years my junior. He's my best friend and I miss him so much. After visiting Vegas at Christmas time I have actually considered looking for work in the States so I can be with him. Of course I've never actually looked because I've also enjoyed my time here... :)

As a former pyromaniac, here's something I absolutely MUST try sometime during this upcoming summer:
http://wmuma.com/tracker/skills/fire/

One of my co-workers is determined to try the "start a fire with a piece of ice". Personally I think the "start a fire with a coke can" sounds so much cooler...

Haha.. another good one. Version 2.0. Hardy-har-har!

Priceless...

earthly lessons

today i picked up some valuable lessons. one is a reminder. RTFM! dr. lawford would always remind us this. Better known as "Read The F***ing Manual", Dr. Lawford would always say READ THE FULL MANUAL! Anyway, that's an important lesson as my parents failed to read the home insurance policy and as a result it will cost them a mid-size sedan.

here's another lesson: Always ask how much something is going to cost before letting people do the work. I had to learn this the hard way, but the plumber will be the one who will have to face God one day and answer why he ripped me off. I kept asking him how much will this cost? And he'd say, "we'll see". Then after the work is done, all 8 minutes worth, he turns to me and says $150. 150 bucks? For 15 minutes? That's what, $600/hour?!

a lesson on the lottery system: 15 co-workers and I "invested" $2 each for last week's Super 7 jackpot of $30M. We won, 3 times.. two 10 dollar prizes and a free ticket. We "invested" $32 and made $22 back. It's like playing the stock market. And we're putting it all back in again. How foolish we are..

finally a lesson on girls: they say that men can't understand women.. but maybe it works the other way too. i mean a guy will try their best to impress a girl, or try to make her laugh, in the hopes of attracting her. but she will think he's just fooling around or trying to be funny. wait, maybe this is still the same ol' men not understanding thing, because we just don't know what it takes for girls to get it. yeah, that's probably what it is. it's always twisted to make us look dumb. i guess that's how God made us. *sigh*

cripes.. forgot i didn't give my take on the superbowl.

I watched the game with Kenric and Mr. Abbas. They came over, we had sushi and beer. It's quite a combo. Try it sometime. *Anything* goes with sushi. And *anything* goes with beer. Thus, the two combined are quite good.

I missed the first quarter due to driving back and forth to the house to wait for the plumber and to see if the cleaners had finished their cleaning yet. I waited til they were all finished then came back to watch the game.

as per the usual.. [SPORTS] ahh!! stay away girls!

What a relief that I missed the first quarter because the defenses soundly stopped eachother. Ben and Kenric were cheering whenever any team got a first down. A FIRST DOWN! So thank God I missed the first quarter.

The game was exactly what I thought it'd be up to that point. But then something happened. The defenses broke down. They got tired. That is what happens when an entire nation hypes this game to be a defense-fest. They get overly excited for the game, and they exhume all their strength in the first half. As a result, there was no defense for the remainder of the game.

Well, when there's no defense, then even mediocre QBs such as Tom Brady and Jake Delhomme, can light it up. And that is exactly what these two mediocre quarterbacks did. Mediocrity vs. mediocrity, these two guys looked like offensive geniuses for 3 quarters and had every unknowledgeable fan raving about this great game.

Okay I'll admit it was a good game. It was exciting, back and forth. The type of game you want to see for the final game of the year. So even with the mediocrity on the field, it was still exciting. I mean, it's still better than a CFL game right?

this song makes me stop thinking about the stressful times i'm in. everyone sing along!

johnny mathis rules!

Just hear those sleigh bells jingle-ing, ring-ting-tingle-ing too
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling "You Hoo"
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you

"Ring-ting-tingle-ing"? It doesn't get any better than this!

Giddy-up giddy-up giddy-up let's go, Let's look at the show
We're riding in a wonderland of snow
Giddy-up giddy-up giddy-up it's grand, Just holding your hand
We're gliding along with a song of a wintery fairy land

how could one not totally love a song that says "giddy-up" three times in a row?

Our cheeks are nice and rosy and comfy cozy are we
We've snuggled close together like two birds of a feather would be
Let's take that road before us and sing a chorus or two
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you

There's a birthday party at the home of Farmer Gray
It'll be the perfect ending of a perfect day
We'll be singing the songs we love to sing without a single stop
At the fireplace where we'll watch the chestnuts pop
Pop! Pop! Pop!

now while you're singing you gotta do the head-bobbing smile just like Carleton when he was singing Tom Jones songs on Fresh Prince. especially on the 'Pop! Pop! Pop!' part!

There's a happy feeling nothing in the world can buy
When they pass around the coffee and the pumpkin pie
It'll nearly be like a picture print by Currier and Ives
These wonderful things are the things we remember all through our li-ives
These wonderful things are the things we remember all through our lives

Who's Currier and Ives? Who cares?! Sing the song!!

Just hear those sleigh bells jingle-ing , ring-ting-tingle-ing too
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling "You Hoo"
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you

when it rains..

today it got a whole lot worse. yesterday, after discovering the mess in my basement, surprisingly my father took the news rather well. i mean there was nothing he or i could do about it. we called insurance and they sent a team over to clean it up.

today, a guy came out to do an estimate on the damage and repairs. they estimated about $25,000. ouch. but hey, we have insurance. right? RIGHT?!

yeah, we do have it. Allstate. Allstate called after I got back to work at 2pm. they wouldn't cover it. apparently in the policy it states that you have to check your house DAILY, otherwise any water-related damages don't count.

ouch.. it's the cost of a car. ouch.

well needless to say i'm concerned, and very very stressed. God has thrown us another curve ball. I'm totally stressed.. there's nothing we can do. Feels so helpless inside..

fishing, anyone?

today would have to be the lowest day so far in my string of bad luck. flat tire, will be fixed next week. my voice is coming back, just can't do any tenor stuff. but today was the BADDEST of all.

after church kenric and i drove back to my place so we can take the subway down to the raptors (and Lakers) game. i finally decided to check a message i'd received on Friday night. i figured it to be someone who was trying to get directions to my place on friday. wrong.

it was my neighbor, saying that there was water flowing pretty fast out of a vent on the side of my house. so i decided to take a look. when i got into the house all i could hear was flowing water. i walked into the kitchen, the kitchen was covered in water, about 1 cm of water on the floor. seemed like water was blasting out from under the kitchen sink.

i heard a lot of water dripping (flowing) in the basement, so i went down to have a look. DEVASTATING! the basement ceiling was on the floor. water, was on the floor, in the carpet. it was soaked enough that when i walked on it, it splashed. water was falling from all over the ceiling, seeping down from the kitchen, i supposed. the walls were a bubbled up from the water seeping through the paint. it was just a moment of utter panic when i thought about how dad was going to react when i told him the great news.

after that it wasn't so bad. i ran over to the neighbors but her husband wasn't home. but she was able to reach him and i spoke to him on the phone and he told me find the main water meter and turn off the water from there. i did that, then i turned on all the taps in the basement to drain the water out.

i called stan for some advice, he was in sunday school, but he called me later to dish out some ideas. kenric went to the game, i heard we lost but it was a good game.

This is amazing. From Tuesday til today, this site has averaged over 4 hits per hour. I checked the counter stats and of my last 10 hits, 8 of them were for the penguin bashing game. Wow! Haha...

After averaging about 600 hits per month, I'll have about 1000 this month. Stop playing the penguin game people!

On Monday, at around 4pm I had to leave work because I couldn't stop coughing. I even brought in Buckleys, it didn't help me much. I had plenty of trouble falling asleep that night.

On Tuesday, I didn't have uncontrollable coughing until about 7pm. Buckleys stopped it, and I had little trouble sleeping.

Today, the uncontrollable coughing never came. It's 11pm. I'm still gonna have some Buckley's before I go to bed, just so I can get a good night's rest.

It's great.. I am having the herbal tea during the day, Vitamin C in the mornings, and Buckley's only when I need it. Tomorrow I'll bring the ginseng stuff for the tea, since Char says that will help clean it up once the virus seems to be waning. Excellent.. at this rate it looks like I'll be able to host small group on Friday. Of course, the huge mess I've left in my place due to the sickness could be a problem..

Tonight Kevin Ho and I went to see the Raptors play the Philadelpha 76ers. In theory we should have won this game. They were missing two of their top players, we were missing no one of significance. And believe it or not, we actually won a game we were supposed to win. It was a pretty good game, no 6-minutes lulls of non-scoring. No horrible turnovers, although we did give up way too many offensive rebounds. But it just didn't matter, because Philly had a bunch of scrubs playing against our healthy squad.

I still say Raptors should trade Vince while we still have a chance to. And here is the perfect trade scenario:

Toronto trades: SF Vince Carter (20.7 ppg, 4.5 rpg, 4.8 apg in 36.8 minutes)
PG Alvin Williams (8.6 ppg, 3.0 rpg, 4.1 apg in 30.7 minutes)

Houston trades: PG Steve Francis (16.6 ppg, 5.7 rpg, 5.7 apg in 39.5 minutes)
SG Cuttino Mobley (15.3 ppg, 4.3 rpg, 3.3 apg in 39.4 minutes)
SF Scott Padgett (3.1 ppg, 2.4 rpg, 0.4 apg in 9.3 minutes)

Comments: This deal makes the most sense. First, it works fine for both team's salary caps. Van Gundy gets two players who are fully willing to let Yao become the focus of their offense. Vince would be more than happy to be the #2 option on the team, and we already know he can pass the ball. Alvin becomes the passing PG that Van Gundy has dreamed about since coming to Houston. On the flip side O'Neill gets a young point guard who can basically do it all. Francis wants the ball, and he has never been the type who needs to hoist 35 shots to score 25 points. He plays good defense, and despite his "me me me" attitude, he still manages approx. 6 assists per game. Mobley is a great scorer as well, can shoot threes. Best of all his contract ends next season.

Picture this starting lineup:
C: Chris Bosh
PF: Donyell Marshall
SF: Jalen Rose
SG: Cuttino Mobley
PG: Steve Francis

a trip down memory lane: "nice"

"Hi!"
"Hi."
"What's your name?"
"Brian."
"Oh, that's a nice name!"

Does anyone remember this? When I think back of all the introductions I made as a kid, I think this one was probably the most prominent. I don't know why these kids would say the same thing. For the longest time I grew up thinking that I had a "nice" name.

Okay.. here's another one. I'd go to school wearing a new t-shirt or track pants, and a kid would come up to me.

"Hi Brian."
"Hi"
"Nice pants."

For some reason I'd always take this as a sign that there was something wrong with my clothing. I'd avoid wearing that pair of pants or t-shirt. Who in their right mind would come up to me and tell me they liked my shirt/pants, without having some alterior motive to insult me? It's weird that I had this way of thinking.

Here's another:

"Look, Brian broke our snow fort."
"No, it wasn't my fault."
"Look, it's ruined. Nice going Brian."
[silence. eyes shifted to ground.]
"Nice one, Brian."

And another:

[overheard conversation]
"... yeah and Mike is cool too, he's so funny"
"What about Brian?"
"Brian? Eww.."
"Hey, don't say that. Brian's nice."

Somehow back in those days, the word "nice" implied something terrible -- something awful that you had to try to avoid like the plague. How could a word like "nice" have been twisted around to imply something so bad, so insulting?

Another fact: the word "nice" never appears in the Bible. Synonyms of it like "kind", "gentle", "friendly", "fine", "beautiful", all appear in the bible. Maybe the word "nice" doesn't exist in the latin/aramaic languages?

When I looked up this word on thesaurus.com, (aside from its usually meanings) I found it a synonym of words like "choosy", "difficult", "finnicky".

How odd, that a word like "nice" can mean both good and bad. Better think twice the next time someone says "nice" to you!

Have a nice day everyone!

I'm going to work tomorrow. As it stands, my insane coughing doesn't start until midday and gets worse and worse as the day progresses from there. I don't know if that has to do with my own energy level or what, but I figure if I get to work early and work my ass off, I can maybe finish the work (deadline on Tuesday) I should have been working on all last week.

I went to service today, and I'm glad I did because Victor spoke about something that I needed to hear, "From Bad to Worse". This past week has been a big downer for me, starting with my cpu getting fried, then getting a flat tire, finding out stuff that I was hoping not to be true, and then getting sick.

There have definitely been feelings of despair, disappointment, and sadness during the past few days. The sickness has really taken a toll on me. The last time I lost my voice this badly was in Ottawa, 3 years ago. I wasn't able to sing properly for at least 3-4 months after I'd lost my voice. I hope that doesn't happen again. Also not having Mom here to care for me has really made me super home-sick during this virus. I'm willing to bet that if Mom were here this thing would've lasted only 2-3 days.

I'm really thankful of the friends around me who are caring, praying, encouraging me. It's been a huge blessing. I know it's just a virus but this past week has been my first true test living out here on my own. Thanks guys..

for all you smack the penguin fans, here are some links so you can continue your smackin':

i think this is the one b.p. scored 587 with:
http://mironov.net/pingu/pingu2.swf

there's also this one, which I managed to get 1212.7:
http://mironov.net/pingu/pingu3.swf

and for the normal version (which i've topped out at 323.5):
http://ze999.ru/stuff/ping/
http://mironov.net/pingu/pingu.swf

good times..


also many thanks to char for giving me the tea and other herbs to help me battle this sickness!

i really hate it when you go to see a doctor, when they give their prognosis it's like they're mocking me."no worries, you'll be fine. it's just a small little virus. give it a few days."
her blank stares says it all: don't be such a wuss!

I hate that. you go because you're worried about your own well being, because you're suffering and the doctor just belittles you by telling you it's nothing. "pulleeze.. it's nothing. why are you wasting my time?"

well, i went to a walk-in clinic under kenric's advice since i've been sick for close to a week.

here's another thing, why is it that when you go to the doctors, while you're in the waiting room, somehow you start healing up? by the time i got to the examination room, i was totally fine, i couldn't even cough if i forced myself to. what's up with that?

who needs medicine, fluids, and rest? just sit inside a doctor's office. it's the same thing. of course the second i walked out side, i was coughing like crazy again. *sigh*

she told me that it should go away in 7-10 days, and just to sleep, drink fluids, and take it easy. she also said to keep eating, but try to eat bland soft stuff.

she said i didn't have the stomach flu. and it's no more contagious than the common cold. "common".. hmph! "psshhh.. brian, it's no big deal at all, it's just a common cold. wuss."

The tire can't be fixed, so I'll have to get it replaced. Yippee!

My voice is really messed up.. I wish you guys could hear it.. it's a barrel o' laughs!

Last night I had a very strange dream in my intermitent sleep. It was weird because I woke up and somehow thought it was real, and then went back to sleep again and kept dreaming about it. All the way til when I woke up I realized I couldn't have been to all those places.

Anyway, the dream started out as a news story, when someone discovered that C.S Lewis had been a phony. Apparently, someone else had created this fake name and posed as Lewis, and written all those books. This guy wasn't even a Christian, but he had written all the books under C.S. Lewis' name, as sort of a trick.

Including the tales of Narnia.. they were all written by this guy, I can't remember his name but it was also two initials and a last name. I seem to remember W.C. Fields, but that doesn't make sense because he's a comedian. Anyway, maybe dreams aren't supposed to make sense.

So, in my dream the person C.S. Lewis never existed. He was just a penname. But then we (I can't remember who) were like, well what about those stories how C.S. Lewis used to hang out with J.R.R. Tolkien? How could those stories be true, if Lewis never existed? So then people started saying that maybe Tolkien never existed either!

That's around the time when I woke up.

Sleeping was harder than I thought. Somehow as soon as I tried to go to bed, my throat wouldn't stop irritating me. Every time I was about to sleep, I started to cough. Then, I vomited again. That's the worst though, when there's nothing in there and you vomit.. that gross yellow stuff comes out. Although I tried to get to bed at 7:30am, and woke up here at 7:45, I probably only got about 4 hours of sleep. :(

Anyway, I just wanted to write out a good luck for my brother D on his SATs today. Don't stress out man, you're the smartest person I know. Remember, the highest SAT mark in the history of our families is 0. And in our extended family, it's like 1450. That's nothing! No pressure!

Finally God has a plan for you and I believe it is probably in the academics. After all you've got nothing else going for you right? Haha..

I don't understand though, how do they schedule the SATs? Why aren't the rest of your friends writing it yet?

Another day, another missed day. Another day of sickness. This morning when I woke up I felt so much better. Everything was fine except for a stomach ache. That stomach ache grew into major pains until eventually it came.

Needless to say I have the stomach flu.

Looking at some online articles, this thing should pass in a few days, after which I should probably go and see a doctor. I'm hoping it'll be gone by Sunday, but it doesn't look like this will happen.

I have the chills now. When I cough, it no longer feels like I'm doing any damage, but on the other hand, there's nothing left to damage because most of my voice is gone.

I made some congee with chicken broth for dinner. It didn't taste too good, but more importantly, my stomach hasn't started gargling so maybe that's a good sign.

Tomorrow I have to drive to Scarborough to get that flat tired fixed.

I'm going to bed now. Have a good night.

Check out this quote by David Stern, commissioner of the National Basketball Association, when asked why he doesn't like the word "legacy":

"Because I'm very focused on the here and the now. I don't take notes. I'm not going to write a book. I decided long ago that if you spend your time taking photos, you don't enjoy the journey as much. I have the greatest job in the world and I'm enjoying it. I don't focus on the history aspect of it."

That was taken from this ESPN article

The thing is when I think about David Stern story, it really is a legacy. He's been with us from when Michael Jordan was drafted, til now. It truly boggles my mind what he's done in the past 20 years, what he's experienced. The NBA is right up there with NFL as one of the best-run sporting organizations ever. Okay maybe it's not quite up there with the NFL, but it's definitely head and shoulder's above hockey or baseball.

Anyway.. enough with the blogging.. you people must be sick of me.

I stayed home again today.

This morning I tried to catch up on blog reading. It's near impossible of course, you go to one, then another and another. There is one cool thing to note though, is the blogger banner and what it advertises for each person's blog. Check it out:

ebrian: "Small Group Curriculum" and "Free Bible Software", related searches: sermon central, sermons
sihlian: "Cool Mind Warm Heart" and "Free Bible Software", related searches: jacky cheung, weather canada
gkyam: "Do You Like Weird Music?", related searches: weird stuff, weird things
jedi-master: "Knee Pads" and "Pet Portrait Paintings", related searches: cartoon animals, cartoon dogs
ilchan: "Christian Faith" and "Troubled by Snoring?", related searches: sleep disorders, sleep
bassman_4f: "100% Free Blog Hosting" and "LiveLogCity", related searches: blog, blogger
iceman_onizuka: "Free Bible Software" and "Upcoming 'Passion' Movie", related searches: prayer of jabaz, jabaz

I read a lot more than these, but I barely knew most of them. Haha.. That's enough stalking for one day, I think. And yeah, I know that the banners are random -- but they're always somewhat related to the page still.

haha.. sharted.

D: I like the music on your site.. it's a nice touch. How do you do it?

Here's an interesting conundrum.

I'm sick. I have a cold. Today at work I coughed so hard that blood came out (ok, i'm just kidding) but it was pretty bad, to the point where my co-worked were like "brace for impact!" type of attitude towards me. I can still get work done ie: I'm still productive.

Do I go to work if I still feel the same way tomorrow, or stay home?

On the one hand I'd probably benefit from another day's rest, but on the other hand I waste taxpayers money because technically I could still be doing work. Also, by going to work I'm risking my teammates' health. But again, I can still get work done, I'm not sick to the point that I can't get stuff done.

The reason I stayed home on Tuesday was because I knew there was no way in heck I'd be able to do anything.

Now what? Any takers?

p.s.: sharted.. lol

the laser printer was supposedly sold out. i'll call them later to confirm. in the meantime, my fever and headache have subsided. i've been drinking water like non-stop here at work and things are going well. except for one time i choked on some water and couldn't stop coughing, it was so much coughing that i couldn't breathe, or lost my breath. people around me were all flinching and scared. it was kinda funny actually, because i felt like i was gonna die, but everyone around was just trying to avoid me.

i wonder if anyone reacted that way to Jesus, when he was carrying the cross. i dunno, it could have been pretty graphic, people'd come over and then just be like "eww.." and run away? It could happen! I guess we'll find out when we see the Passion movie.

speaking of Passion, the bassman was telling me that the next Passion cd will be based on remakes of old hymns, so that could be a treat for those of you who are big "hymn" fans! it comes out Feb. 27.

laser
i've been in the market for a cheap laser printer for awhile now. it'd be very useful for me for printing stuff when i needed it, such as maps to get to someone's place. it's just a convenience thing i guess. anyway, i've been trying to get a deal for a laser printer for under $300. That's been my goal. Today I found this great deal at Staples, check it out!

Go to Staples.ca, and add the Samsung ML-1710 Laser Printer.
+ add the Acco $0.32 ruler (no kidding.. it brings your purchase to just over $300)
- $100 coupon (70829)
- $30 off $150 coupon (68342)
- another $30 off $150 coupon (68360... for complete list of Staples.ca coupons, check here)

total =$141 + 15% = $161
- $50 mail-in rebate for the printer. The whole thing comes out to $111. Haha.

along came polly

this is a date movie, if there's such a thing. i mean lets face it, the date ends after dinner, then you go to a movie, and then it continues after the movie. but that's not the point. the point is it's a romantic comedy.

purely for the laughs I liked this movie although i didn't think it was as funny as Meet the Parents or Something About Mary. some points:

- most of the jokes were covered in the preview commercials
- they borrowed a storyline from Friends
- hank azaria is *ripped*
- whatever happened to alec baldwin? now we know.
- baldwin is either super tall, or ben stiller is super short
- i will never get sick of toilet-bowl humor
- there's a 1 in 46,000 chance of falling through a subway/sewer grate ?

6.5/10.0

for once the movie ended early but i wasn't able to join the fellows for food, as i am sickly. being sickly isn't so bad except being sickly whilst being home alone is. i can really see what ina was complaining about. it's amazing how strong a small cold can be when you're lacking mom's tlc.

edit: yesterday i was in sort of a funk and crabby mood. giving the movie more thought, i'd say it was more of an adaptation of some funnier movies in the past.
- the dancing part is taken from the hilarious Stiffler American Wedding scene
- the RiskMaster comparison between the two girls taken from an episode of Friends, when Ross compares Julie and Rachel ("just a waitress" is an exact copy of the line used by ross).
- or a comparison of stiller's father in the movie, similar to Silent Bob, in that he says nothing throughout the whole movie until the very end, and when he speaks, it's insanely insightful.
- a lot of jew jokes, possibly adapted from 'will & grace', what with grace adler playing reuben's cheating wife ?

okay, i'm stretching, but anyway all that said it was still pretty funny i change my rating to a 7.5/10.

i still can't get over this guys voice.. in the song "mi mancherai (il postino)", i don't even know what the dude is singing about, but it still gives me chills down my spine, and tears to my eyes... it's just *that* good!

edit: it drives me nuts to be here at work, because i want to try to sing along..

i'm back!

my cpu got fried on thursday night. i'm not sure how it happened, it was working fine that night, but the next morning it wouldn't turn on. on saturday my friend keith and i spent a few hours trying different combinations to see if it was something else, but in the end we concluded it had to be the cpu.

our plan was to buy the cpu today, right after church, so he came along to the service. i'm not sure what he thought of it, i didn't ask yet. anyway on the way over to pac.mall, there was a funny sound coming from my car, so when we parked we had a look. flat tire! doh! luckily i have that nissan road side assistance deal, so they came in a changed the tire for me. it wouldn't have been hard to do it myself, but it was pretty muddy and cold so i didn't want to bother.

afterwards we bought the cpu, came back here and well, it's up again. thank goodness.

the last 24 hours made me realize what a crappy and boring life i have. i couldn't think of anything to do when my pc was down. i slept on my couch for most of the day watching who knows what.

my bro got me the josh groban cd, "closer", for Christmas. i've had it for awhile now but just started really listening to it today. i brought it to work and have been listening to it with headphones. it's amazing. less than half of it is in english.

his voice is just really nice. wow, i wish my voice was *half* as good as his.. i guess it's like this. there's a certain scale from 1 to 10 for quality of voice. then beyond that there's another scale, where you can sense the singer's emotion. josh groban is a 20.

yesterday in the bachelorette, this one guy gave her a pair of slippers and this great line: "It's so you know I'll be with you every step of the way." Aww... she ended up giving that guy the white rose, which signifies he gets an individual date with her. Smooth!

hmmm.. should i be posting this stuff on my blog? now i'll never get to use it!

last night's dream is very vivid. i dreamed that the rapture came, and i was left behind. but it was all online, so it was like I'd go click on a person i know, and then it would just say something like "user doesn't exist". Then I'd click on another and another. It really freaked me out. Only my non-christian friends remained!

i wonder if this is a common fear that other christians have. knowing full well how much time you set aside for God each day, knowing all the sins you've committed:

Would you be surprised if you were left behind?

I can't believe it's only Wednesday. I thought it was Thursday and tomorrow was Friday, so I left just enough food in the fridge before I'd have to cook on Saturday. Now I'll have to improvise something for Friday.. Darn! I guess I failed to mention that on Saturday I attempted to cook enough food to last the week. I missed it by a day, it seems.

Today I woke up on my own, for the first time since last year. I finally caught up from the sleep I missed from the past 2 weeks. My brain woke me up at 6am, then again at 7am. Then the alarm woke me up at 7:30am. I'm glad because the last few days I slept 8 hours and was still waking up exhausted. It was kinda scaring me..

Things at work are going normally. My boss has been impressed with my work on the admin manual for the system we've been working on. It's all coming together now. UAT starts some time in March, and as the lead I'm pretty excited about it. It should be very interesting.. haha.. here I am getting all excited about testing, of all things. It's funny how the other day I heard someone say "module" and it brought back some memories (and nitemares) of school. I don't think a day went by in university that we didn't hear the word 'module'. I guess what they say is true, that what you learn in school really is, 99% useless.

what a disappointment. this weekend's football games were all disappointing except for one. they were good games, just that my teams didn't win. Go Colts! I think it's clear now who the REAL nfl mvp is.

those pictures will get done, soon.. the program i found to do it is nice, but it's a bit slow, i haven't gotten the hang of it yet. i want to upload them at 640x480, because at 1600x1200 they take too much disk space.

i bought an mp3 player from monchichi today. i'm not sure if it was the right thing to do, given my recent spending. but i was going to get one anyway, and this one was a cheap. i figure i saved money in the long run. worse case i could give it away as a gift..

i've been contemplating a new cell phone. my current one is kinda boring. i want a cool funkie one with flashing blue lights and plays a nice tune when the phone rings. i want the whole world to know when i'm getting a call! telus has the new lg4600 (incidentally i discovered the lg 7000 is already out in asia). still, it flashes and has color screen, and has a polyphonic ringer. what more could a guy ask for?

for everyone who's sick.. get well! G suggests taking vitamin c's.. i did that in university, but nowadays with all those sick days i have stored up, i kinda don't mind if i got sick. haha.. i'm kidding of course. if anything, i should at least try to get better to benefit those around me!

take care everyone.

what a game! what... a.... game!!

oh btw, i didn't do the egg thing. i guess i'll try it next week, or sunday afternoon. i've been cooking for the past 2 hours. i've made enough to last the week, possibly longer. Hehe..

out

I went out today. First time that I've been outside since last Sunday. It's supposed to be -20 C with windchill. But it didn't feel too bad. In fact, I wasn't impressed at all. Maybe I should've gone out yesterday, when it was -34 C. Looks like I missed out..!

I bought two cd's, The Singles 1992-2003 by No Doubt, and Dizzy Up The Girl by Goo Goo dolls. I went out planning to buy the Dolls' cd and Michelle Branch, but Futureshop was sold out on her stuff, so I got the Dolls' cd, and then I just happened to see the other one, looked at the back and found 4-5 songs that I liked by them, including Sunday Morning, one of my faves.

The No Doubt cd is good. I don't usually comment on mainstream stuff, but I'd hafta say I'm already satisfied with this buy, having only listened to the cd halfway. I really really like the new song It's My Life, the remake of an old 80s hit. Also kinda neat is the insert, which gives 3-4 paragraphs about how the song came to be. I've always thought No Doubt was a little bit ahead of its time. They're not like regular bands. They incorporate various styles of music. Rock, dance, alternative, even reggae. Their music sounds nothing like anyone else, it's very unique. Anyway..

As for "Dizzy", I chose to buy this cd for two reasons. One, I like their stuff, and two, I've ripped them off for long enough. Having listened to googoo mp3s for years now, it's time to give back a little bit. They deserve it.

more funnies from vegas.

my parents had a fridge in the garage. after all those tv shows where i see people store useful things in the garage, for the first time saw it being put to use. a fridge! food.. in the garage. what a concept!

my brother told me about this funny thing they do to eachother at school, it's "equalizing". it's a boys only thing. basically what happens is some poor kid is standing around mind his own business, and another kid will come up from behind him, reach between his legs, and "cup" him. LOL. my brother says it's funny because you can see a little guy do it to a huge guy, and when he gets cupped, he jumps so high up that it looks like the little guy is super strong.

also he told me there were next levels, where someone will "cup", and the "lift". And even worse, someone would cup, grab, and then pull down! Hahahaha.. crazy kids..

i'm downloading pics (finally) and will put them up somewhere.. I guess yahoo pictures?

= sports =

just a few words about something i was just reading over lunch. espn did an article on eli manning, younger brother of current nfl co-mvp, and how he could be the #1 overall pick at this years draft. what a great story this is, if he were to be taken first over all by the Chargers. what a family. what's even cooler is Eli, short of Elisha, went to the same school his father played, you know what else, his mother was homecoming queen from that same school, Ole Miss. isn't that amazing?

both boys, quite smart, garnering honor roll every year. both are 6-5, peyton is about 10 pounds heavier. both obliterated college records, and both are winners. even their father was great, archie made the pro bowl twice in his illustrious nfl career. all 3 play the same drop-back style.

it's probably not a big deal but to me this is all very cool. i mean their father must be absolutely thrilled. he spent 14 years in the nfl with absolutely atrocious teams, some of the worst offensive lines in the history of the nfl. he was battered and beaten. then you look at Peyton Manning, who's well on his way to be one of the most successful quarterbacks ever, improving from previous year every year since he entered the league. the Colts have good coaching, and a *very* nice offensive nucleus to build around.

and not to jump the gun but imagine if Eli Manning goes to the Chargers. That's an even better (younger) nucleus to build around. David Boston, LaDainian Tomlinson. there's nothing better than having a great pass-catching runningback for a young quarterback. it provides the qb with a safety blanket. and tomlinson had what, 100 receptions this season?

this is great. the last few days of pdl has talked about temptation, how it God's lessons in building us up. and how when i get a tempting thought, rather than try to block it out i should just think of something else. so now every time i think of a temptuous thought, i have either practiced guitar or done some pushups. so either i'll get worse and worse but get really good at guitar and building up my bulging muscles (lol), or i'll be one step closer spiritually.

that's a decent trade-off..

eggs

eggs are very nutritious. i've missed out on this nutrition for the last 3-5 years, when i began to realize i was allergic to it. it made me think today that i should try to get back on eggs. there has to be a way. when i looked it up on the net, someone pointed out to me that i was likely allergic to certain forms of cooked eggs. in my case, she said that there were certain proteins created from fried eggs. I feel like i've been over this before.

anyway, i was thinking, maybe once a week i should try cooking eggs in a different form and trying them out. but knowing that there is some bit of risk from the allergy, i would set a date ahead of time, like a Saturday afternoon so that i have
1) ample time to recover if i need it
2) at least on sunday people would notice i didn't make it to church
3) well, let's face it i couldn't try this on a work night

i could sample small bits at first, and if nothing happened, i could try more and more.

from as far as i can remember, i have always had the same problem with scrambled eggs, but i used to be able to eat fried rice, but now i can't, which means the allergy has become much more heightened. but i also used to have hardboiled eggs with no ill-effects. maybe i should try that. also, fried eggs like a la sunny side up etc, i should try those as well. also someone at work suggested i try just yokes, or just whites, to see what happens.

i guess i'll target this saturday for my first try at this. hard-boiled seems like the safest bet, since i had them when i was little, and also i can eat those thousand year old ones without any problems.

exercise

i am going to start exercising. now before you start inviting me to your sporting event, stop. i haven't played sports since grade 9 gym class with mr. bury, so i'm not about to start now.

yesterday i started doing push-up's, and i will add various ab exercises as soon as i learn how to do them.

i've always talked about getting into shape but never putting any action behind those empty words. with all the time i have on my hands, why not sacrifice a little gaming time and putting it towards making myself healthy. for one thing i remember from my Ottawa days that working out kinda quashes the appetite or gives you a sense of 'bodily conscience', or 'stomach alarm'. also now that i'm nearing the over-the-hill mark, i figure i better get that metabolism a kick-start.

i was reading an article that said that working out in the morning, right after an 8-12 hour 'fast' is good. apparently something about how the body is low on some chemical that is needed for energy, and as a result the body uses the fat instead of that chemical. well, i'm not really that fat, tho i have fairly big, albeit subtly big, belly. and butt, i think my bum is big, at least it is, according to my mom.

officially i am cutting out Manchu Wok from my diet and replacing it with Subway. i usually have the Wok on Thursdays. maybe.. well i still have mcdonald's 2 times a week. would it be better to replace mcd's instead? the thing is the Wok meal costs about the same as a submarine, whereas the McD's meals are dirt cheap.

i am about to eat instant noodles with dumpling and watercress. WATERCRESS? i looked that up and it says "Any of several related aquatic plants". Gee, that says a lot doesn't it. it's leftovers from the hot pot. holy cow.. i typed that 3 times and kept typing "hoptop" by accident..

Until next time, this is..

Today at church it seemed to me like the speaker didn't properly prepare for his sermon because he was dragging on those long sentences that you use when you try to reach the word count for a paper or essay in highschool. He seemed to ramble on and on and only got out 2 points.

In Vegas, my family goes to a church called South Hill Church Community, which is weird since here it's Toronto Chinese Community Church. They have Church and Community flip-flopped. The worship team at South Hills is quite good. The leader is a big Chris Tomlin fan so that helps. Secondly their drummer, apparently finished second in a national drummer competition. He's unbelievable, and he shows how much he enjoys when he plays, beam from ear to ear. The main pastor is Brett Johnson. His message is very brief and simple, but he gets the point across and they are very applicable lessons. Also they had this "Gospel Mystery Box", where a kid would put a secret household item or toy, and on Sunday, they'd gather at the front, and the pastor would have to open the box, and deliver a quick sermon for the kids, and use that object in his lesson. Pretty creative..

Tonight we had small group at my place. It took a bit of procrastinating to finish cleaning my place up. Yam brought an electric plate stove thingie and veggies and meat, and we had hot pot. It was pretty good.. I can't believe I don't have any vinegar..

There were 5 of us. Nancy, Duncan, Gladys, Carrie, and yours truly.

Aside: I am truly blessed by the friends I have in here in Toronto. Definitely my most cherished times are these, spent with my fellow servants of Christ. Each week I look forward to Fridays and Sundays, they are the highlights of my week.

Afterwards, we headed out to PacMall to have bbt with Ina. She's flying back down tomorrow morning. I stopped having tapioca whenever i go for bbt. In fact I dunno why i still called it bbt. It should be called ljt (lichee jelly tea). But seriously, no one would understand what i was talking about..

--- sports ---

as i predicted, indy got by denver. i used to be a bronco's fan, until Jake Plummer came along. I've never liked this kid. Nobody in the history of the league has had as bad of a interception-to-touchdown ratio (not counting this season), and still remained in the NFL. To me that says he was given one too many chances to play. So that said, I don't believe in "the snake", and I think he doesn't deserve to play in this league.

I'm a little miffed by the recent performance of Mr. Brandon Stokley. A great talent that did little or nothing, waits until I've completely forgotten him and then starts beasting.

also as i predicted, Favre beat the Seahawks. With the recent death of his father, I believe not only is he fired up but the team as well want this bad, just for him. Crappy teams can win when they have the proper motivation, so a team like the Packers are extremely dangerous. I didn't watch the game, but looking at the boxscore it looks like it was a good game. It's funny for Mike Holmgren to have been in two hard fought battles (think GB vs. 49ers a few years ago, Holmgren's last game with the Pack), and lose them both.

i was wrong about Dallas, although at the same time, was right that without establishing the run they'd have no chance.

two things:

firstly, on my plane ride home from Phoenix (it was a connection flight). I sat next to a young boy who kept asking me questions non-stop. I didn't mind so much except at one point i felt like sleeping but he kept on going. the thing is though, on the other side of the boy was his older sister, probably around 15-16 years old (the kid was about 11, although i never asked).

after a barrage of questions, she turned to him and told him to be quiet and leave "the man" alone.

haha. that shocked me. sure, legally i am a man, at 25 years old, i'm well past the legal definition of a man. i don't know why but i still feel like a kid and refer to people my age as kids as well. now if she had said to "leave that guy alone", then that would've been fine.

gosh.. i'm a man. maybe i should start behaving like one?

secondly, i was reading an article in an entertainment magazine from Vegas. there was an article about the goo goo dolls, one of my favorites. they talked about how most of the dolls' songs invoke vivid memories from various parts of our lives. i thought about that and i think the author is right. if i think about songs like Name, Slide, Black Balloon, Here Is Gone, Iris, Dizzy, Broadway, they all invoke memories of my past. i guess i could say that if the Dolls released a greatest hits album, it would be the soundtrack of my adolescence. That's pretty wild..

= sports = (seriously, don't read this if you don't follow the NFL)

the US covers football extensively, (it's like their hockey).

just a quick flip on the nfl playoffs.

i've been cheering for the Vikings and Seahawks this year. i'm a sucker for high octane offenses and teams with no defense at all. they're fun to watch. however, they don't win unless they're perfect, so Vikings missed the playoffs. i've been scouting the Seahawks for the last couple of seasons, and I think this is the year they could make some noise. Next year will probably be their year as Holmgren finally has his offense, they just need to work on defense over the offseason.

initial predictions is that the packers will probably beat the seahawks and force me to cheer for the pack. that's okay though, i'd love to see Favre make a run for the bowl.

that said, i believe it will be Rams or the Panthers coming out of the NFC. The Panthers are a lot like the Ravens, they have a good running game and strong defense. I like the cowboys and bill parcells, but they are very young and inexperienced.

Philly. They remind me of the Pats two years ago when they won it all. The downfall of this team is Donovan McNabb. McNabb is a far superior QB to Tom Brady, and I think ultimately he will hinder this team from going deep into the playoffs. Doesn't make sense right? Philly is McNabb, whereas that NE team was just a big team of no-bodies. McNabb will take it upon himself to perform, and he will feel pressured to get things done on his own. He'll put the team on his shoulders and carry the team. The trouble is, he can't afford to rely on the players around him like Brady did that year. You heard it here first.. Philly will choke.

I'm an NFC type of guy. I'll cheer for any team that makes it to the finals, other than the Panthers. Imagine a Panthers/Ravens SB? Booooooring!


in the AFC i like the Colts but i see the Ravens as a definite force. If they can by some miracle get past the might titans, i could see them reach the finals and possibly win it all. the trouble is, Tennessee is for real this year, not like in previuos times when they squeaked into the playoffs or won by some miraculous play. they're actually really good this year. McNair played through the pain for once in his life.

The Colt's hopes lie in Manning's ability to step up in the playoffs, which he's previously been unable to do. I have a feeling this is the year Manning finally gets this monkey off his back.

Everyone talks about Tom Brady and the Pats. I have never liked Tom Brady because I've always felt he gets undeserved credit. He is the type of QB who keeps his team in games because he doesn't do anything. And the reason he doesn't do anything, is because if he does something, he'll likely make a huge error. He is the modern day Troy Aikmen.

Pats had a relatively easy schedule this year, and finished 14-2. They have basically the same team as the past 2 years minus a few key defensive players. 1 year they won the SB, the other year they sucked. How do you explain two identical teams, won winning the SB and the other year sucking, and then being really good again?


There are too many great teams in the AFC this year. Ravens, Colts, Titans.. even the Chiefs all have good enough teams to beat any of the NFC teams. They're like the western conference of the NBA. Another reason to cheer for the NFC.


The very truth is I haven't followed the NFL as closely as in previous years. I've been known to make scoring predictions but I can't do that this year because I just don't know enough to make a guess. As with every year, thousands of experts make their early predictions and 99% of them get it wrong.

My pick is the Rams vs. Titans in a rematch.

Ah.. home again.

Las Vegas, Days 7-11

It snowed last night and when I woke up the rooftops and front "lawns" (there's no grass.. it's just gravel) was covered in snow. My family had never seen snow in Vegas so it was a treat for everyone. Surprisingly I heard it's warm in Toronto today. As if the cold weather has made its way towards me and is chasing me.

Not alot has gone on since I last posted. I've finished 3 computers games. Halo, Tron 2.0, and I just finished Call of Duty a few moments ago. Of the three, Tron was the most fun and interesting.

It was Madame Toussad's, not Tussan. A-Mei was in town, she performed at the.. Rio? I don't remember now. I didn't go. For a brief 1-2 months I was a fan. But not anymore.

My grandfather went through some weird stages, a few days ago his face became very red and it was like he was having a fever, or possibly even a minor stroke. For a good 10 minutes he had food in his mouth and he wasn't chewing or even speaking, although he was still responding to us. Then yesterday he started crying when he wanted more milk. My dad was a little scared but he poured him some more and he stopped crying.

Yesterday we went to a sushi restaurant (buffet) called Blue Wave. $22/person (ouch!). My brother went there for his birthday a few months ago, and threw up afterwards because he ate so much. Since then he'd been raving about the restaurant and how I should go. So we went. It was really disappointing. It turns out that they "ran out" of salmon. Imagine, sushi with no salmon. How devastating!

I got a good pic of the vasectomy.com billboard. There is also another ad, that says 'reverse vasectomy'. The funny thing is it also says "guaranteed or your money back". Hahah..

There are a lot of Hummers in Vegas. I've seen at least 40. Also a lot of Cadillac Escalade's, you know, the big trucks that all the big stars drive. And quite a few Corvettes. No sup-ed up Civics here.

..

My heart sank when I received news of Eric. I was both surprised and deeply saddened. It didn't fully sink in until last night I was lying in bed thinking about how awful it must be for Nicole, I had trouble sleeping, thinking about how she must feel during this ordeal. For him, I pray he isn't in pain or turmoil. I have no idea what the person goes through during a coma. Is it a sleep state, or is it a dream state? Is he constantly trying to wake up and being unable to, or is he completely unaware of it? Mostly I pray for Nicole and his sister and parents. It is the worst feeling when you want to help someone and feel helpless because there's nothing you can do.

Happy Birthday, Jesus!

Today we all got up pretty late (8:30am). We all wake up fairly early here because the house is brand new and there are no blinds, so when the sun comes out, it gets way too bright.

We went to The Orleans hotel to watch Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. It was pretty good. I cried a few times, all tears of joy. They changed a lot of things from the books, but it was still pretty good. The audience applauded after Legolas' big oliphant performance. Also just before the movie started a perky mom yelled out "MERRY CHRISTMAS" to everyone. Americans rock. There's no "happy holidays" out here. It's Christmas time, plain and simple.

Yesterday we went to the Christmas service at South Hills Church Community, where my family normally worships. It was a packed house. They rent out the gym at a school called Bill Carter. I'm not sure who Bill Carter is.. The service was quite good.. everyone was all dressed up. I was in my normally ghetto travelling clothing! Haha. Come to think of it, all my clothes are pretty ghetto. Maybe I need a change in wardrobe..

Anyway after LOTR we went to the Venetian hotel on the strip. My bro got us 4 free tickets to see Madame Tussan's Wax Museum. I'll post pics after I get home. They were really realistic!

By the time we got home, it was 6pm, too late to cook and my grandparents were starving. So we hurried out to the nearest place to eat. Unfortunately, it was Silverton's Hotel Casino. Their buffet has got to be the worst buffet I have ever eaten. I was starving, and yet when i got my plate and went to get food, I was totally stumped. It was worse than a school cafeteria.. $14/person for pure crap. That's US dollars..

Oh, for Christmas I got a new pair of shoes. Nike walkers.. pretty nice. They look a big goofy but they're really comfortable!

Las Vegas, Days 2-5

Las Vegas is a fun city, but really only *fun* if you're a non-believer going on a wild gambling, drinking and sexapade. Of course then for me, it's just the bright lights and being with family. And laughing at the hilarious sex billboards. One of them which I still haven't gotten a picture of, is this giant white billbard with the title "vasectomy.com", with the caption "it's easier than you think" underneath. Haha..

I saw Roy's buddy, (the white tiger) at The Mirage, The Bellagio, Caesar Palace, Treasure Island. They're all just hotels with casino's and expensive shows which I can't afford. Outside along the strip, there's funny little latino guys handing out "business" cards, which show naked girls and phone numbers. The Bellagio has a fountain that's supposed to move around with a song that is playing, but I went during the day and that show only goes during the night. Also at the Mirage there is a water/show volcano, which also runs at night. Treasure Island has a big pirate ship with scantily clad women dancing on it. Also at night.

I'm hoping to catch it all one of these days.. and get good pictures.

Oh yeah, I bought a new digital camera. Olympus Stylus 400. I was just going to buy the 300 but my dad told me "don't be cheap, Brian". I also got a 256 mb card for it.. The camera is almost the same as my old one, so no learning curve..

What else.. I went to a few buffets now. The food is really cheap here, but the food is also really bad quality. Whereas in Toronto when you stop eating at a buffet because you feel satisfyingly full, in Vegas you stop because you think you're gonna be sick (before you're full). It's a different sensation.

I saw Red Rock Canyon, on our way to visit my dad at work yesterday. It was breathtaking. Massive mountainss of red rock surrounded by white, and regular grey. While I was standing at one of the lookout points I started to sing "Wondrous Works". It goes:

Looking at His Wonderous Works
I stand, Amazed in awe.
How can any person doubt that
He is God?

Since nature sings out its praises
That I ought to know
To share in this grand worship to the Lord

Well.. those are probably wrong.. but close? My dad works in this tiny little shack, while his real office is still being built. The back of the office has a small jail cell. Pretty cool..

There are more "In-n-out" and "Jack In The Box" burger joints than McD's here.. Btw, in In-N-Out burgers are amazing...

Las Vegas - Day 1

The flight left a little late because they had to de-ice the wings. But all in all it was a good flight. I got a window seat and we got to see Santa Clause 2. Pretty silly movie, but it had a nice ending..

As the plane was landing, you could see "the Strip". The airport was right beside it.. I could see the big MGM Grand hotel, the big Pyramid thing. The city of Las Vegas was surprisingly larger than I expected. Going in I thought it would be the Strip, and then desert. But really there's actually a small little city here!

The first thing I saw when I came out of the plane was slot machines. Slot machines everywhere! People were actually using them! I couldn't imagine, how could you get off a plane and just start gambling right away. Or maybe when you're flying away you need that last *fix* before you leave. How silly is that..

It was big hugs all around when we met in the baggage claim area.

I dunno for me it was weird seeing the family again, and it was weird on the ride home, looking around and seeing the bright city lights. They had a lot of partial nudity on the billboards.. Las Vegas must be the most liberal city of the US. Also in the US, Mariah Carey, and Seinfeld. Too bad the shows are so darned expensive.

The weather is nice, it was around 10pm PST, and I had my head out the window as my dad was driving. Not for very long though, it's not *that* warm. Still, pretty nice..

When we got to the house, I realized what a big place it was. The house is a mansion.. I mean it is big. If any of you have been to my house in TO, it's nothing compared to this house. It could just be the architecture. It's much more "grandeur". It reminds me of Tim's house in Kanata, only bigger (but no basement, so all in all probably smaller).

My mom said that in Vegas if it rains for more than 10 minutes, there's a flood.. LOL

As I was saying, house is pretty massive. They have a giant screen tv, and all kinds of stuff. The place seems too big, like it needs more people. They should have at least 2-3 more people living here. Maybe me and my future wife.. hehehe. They built a bedroom for me, and the washroom has two sinks..

The water here is soft.. when you soap up, you can't rinse it all off.. it's so weird. My bro says they use half the amount of soap he used to use. It just doesn't wash off..

At night, it was super cold. They forgot to open up the heat vent in my room, and I was so cold. It was like camping, you know that feeling of coldness at around 4-5am? That's what it was like, all night long. In the morning I opened my door and went into the sitting room and slept there.. It was way warmer.

Today we're planning on going to the Strip at night. Actually I'm glad to get this outta the way. After all, it's Sin City. It's the last place I want to be. If it were my preference, I'd rather fly them all to TO and celebrate Christmas there. But this is how it's gonna be.. so I have to live with it.

Yahoo! Launch just played a song by Josh Groban -- very good voice.. If you look him up on Amazon.com, you can get a free download of his song "You Raise Me Up". It's quite good.. check out the lyrics:

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

I went the Justis Kao concert yesterday. Justis definitely has a lot of talent, both in singing and piano. He's got a great voice and very creative talent on the ivories.. and he's very charismatic, not to mention a pretty good-looking guy. Hey, I'm not afraid to admit it! He and his team sang a lot of Christmas songs and stuff like that.

That style of music (RnB/Funk) isn't really my cup o tea, but it was still enjoyable nonetheless.

I ran into Can & Mylene there. I hadn't seen them since ages ago when I visited NTCBC. Our family left M3C shortly after Can resigned. It's interesting to run into people like that, who played a big part in a rather large transition of my family's church life. We reminisced for a bit and then realizing I had nothing else to say to them, I went back to my seat.

I'm getting to know 'Nita better and better as weeks go on. My first impressions of her are nothing like what I see now. She's so silly at times, and funny too. One impression that remains is that she is a very strong/mature Christian, and as I've been trying my hardest to surround myself with these types of people -- so this is a good thing. I think that God has really blessed me with the new relationships I've been making in the past year.

I feel the urgency to strive to surround myself as much as possible with disciplined, responsible, loving believers. This is just one of my goals that I wanted to shoot for, knowing my tendencies and the fact that my parents are far, far away. If there's one thing I lack, it's definitely the discipline factor.

Well, this is probably my last post in Toronto as I'll be leaving shortly after I get home from work tonight. My friend Keith will be taking me to the airport. I haven't figured out how I'll get back yet, but I'll worry about that later, I guess.

my stereo has this delay setting. i think it's specially there for jazz music, i don't know.. but anyway it makes norah jones sound really cool.. and all other jazz music in general.

without music my spirit grows stagnant. i deleted all of my mp3s the other night, deciding it was best to just delete them rather than "wait and see if i'll buy the cd eventually". so now, i've got nothing to listen to. i realize now how music affects my emotions so deeply.. music captures the very fiber of my being, my mood, my feelings.. it can grab control of me, takes over me. now that my collection is so tiny, my mood is very similar, in that i feel like i'm in a bit of rut, like i wanna do something but don't know what. restlessness.

on the subject of Urbana. i know i'm not too old to go. i also know that God hasn't called me to do missionary work at this stage of my life. things keep falling into place at work. if I was being called to do something else, God would've closed the doors on my current job.

Christmas. For some reason the last couple weeks when I was reflecting on the meaning of Christmas I kept thinking it was Easter. A couple nights ago after a reflection and prayer I found myself feeling a great amount of shame and guilt because my mind and wandered to the time Christ originally died for me. When I finished praying I was in tears, and then I shook it off realizing it wasn't even Easter time. Isn't that weird? Christmas time is a joyous occasion, and here I was thinking about the death rather than the birth. It must be the ADD...

re: baptism

I was just going to put this in the comments but it was getting too long.

The point I'm trying to make is that I believe it *is* black & white. In the Bible God commands us to be baptised as Christians. Just like we're commanded to love one another, worship Him, and spread His Word.

But I agree that one's own reason for getting baptised should be genuine and valued. When I got baptised, I did it because I felt it was the right thing to do. I knew that I believed and felt the next logical step was to get baptised. To me it is black & white, so as soon as my church felt I was old enough to get baptised, I did it. When my brother was contemplating his baptism, my parents urged him to do it. "Just do it. It doesn't matter whether or not you think you're ready." I was shocked by this response.

Although he and I are really close, we rarely discuss theology. I honestly didn't know if he had truly accepted Christ or if he was just going through the motions. I guess mom/dad know best.

Debut

Today I debuted in the t3c choir. People said we were good, although I swear some of the guys beside me were off, singing the wrong notes just like in practice. But there were so many of us, people probably couldn't tell. It was fun though, and the song was super easy. There were 6 baptismals (praise God almighty!). I know I've gone over this before about baptismals but I just thought of a really good analogy for baptisms and why people should get baptized. I believe strongly that once you have accepted Christ you should get baptized.

Think of a couple who moves in together but don't plan on getting married. There has to be some kind of conflict or problem that one or both of these two people have with eachother. It's like they're testing first to see if they can stand to be with one another. This to me is very similar to a Christian who doesn't get baptised. It's as if they accept Jesus, and but there's something wrong and they don't feel like they want to make the commitment. Maybe they're afraid, or waiting it out to just see whether this christianity thing "works out" for them. I dunno.

...

Right after church I headed home and then to the ACC with kenric. To make this story short, the Raptors played a very bad game, and the officiating was even worse. We lost the game, and our string of 'Raptors always win when we go to their games' was snapped. However, our string of 'Raptors always win when we get beer at halftime' is still intact. I didn't feel like drinking today, as it was an afternoon game, on a Sunday. Also our 'Raptors always win when we sit the Sprite Zone' record still lives..

I must sound the like a big geek. I'll stop now on sports.

...

Finally mr.loquacious returns with something for us to think about:

Why are sweet potato pie's called "sweet potato pies", and not "yam pies"? Aren't sweet potatos, the same thing as yams? And why is it that "sweet potato pie" sounds so much more delicious that "yam pies"? And get this, my brother (who likes sweets like me) likes potatoes, but not yams. Potatoes have no taste at all, and yams have the sweetie goodness (and softness when baked correctly). This boggles the mind!

CNN.com - U.S.: 'We got him' - Dec. 14, 2003

CNN.com - U.S.: 'We got him' - Dec. 14, 2003

Wow!

tired and full

last night i was up really late. after worship at church (whereupon i arrived late, by almost 30 mins) we went to congee wong's at first markham place. then afterwards i met up with some friends at the ten ren's downstairs. i made the mistake of picking green tea instead of black tea. (passionfruit green tea with lichee jelly) green tea is so bitter! i wondered to myself whether the girls working there would start to recognize me. i go there way too often..

i'm really tired right now. getting ready to sleep. and i'm full, for a change as well. in total this week i had 2.5 dinners. more like 2.1. yesterday at congee wong's i was planning to have some dinner, but they put an egg right in the middle of it, raw. luckily i was able to have one bowl of non-egg-ed congee, although it may have had a bit because i had minor pains afterwards and completely lost my appetite.

anyway back to the dinner tonight i had some leftovers from last night that the group was kind enugh to let me have, and dumplings. still, i've only eaten on average 1 meal per day all week long.. not good

i can see that i'm rambling now. hopefully no one read this one. haha.

Today at work, my boss expressed his disappointment that i was only able to get a 6 month extension from the City, and then he told me he pulling for trying to have me converted to a full-timer. Imagine me, a lifer with the City! Crazy!

When I see God's wonderous works in my life, it is simply amazing. I can't express in words how thankful I am for the way He's blessed me time and time again. A year ago when God gave me this job I told Him that I would whole heartedly commit myself to His will and follow His plan for me. Each time it was near the end of my contract, I never once worried that it might not be extended, or even if it wasn't going to be extended, I did not waver.

I think in my heart I've fully put my life into His hands and allowed Him to do His works to the point where I no longer feel like it's something I need to worry about anymore. My faith has grown and I know that He will open the doors that need to be opened, and close the doors that need to be closed. I think that this approach to life has brought me a lot of peace and joy.

People always ask me where I see myself in 3-5 years. I never really know what to tell them. Before, I had no answer because I just have no real sense of ambition. I've never set career goals like what kind of company I'd like to work at, what kind of hours I'll be working, how many letters come after my name, etc, etc.. All that stuff has never really mattered to me. But I think that at this point in my life it's not just a matter of not having vision or ambition, but more a matter of just not caring about stuff like that because I know in my heart that it's not important.

I know people will say that I can only think this way because I've been so blessed and if I were suffering like many of my friends are right now, I'd be saying different things. Maybe they're right, maybe if God takes everything away I'll be less faithful, more demanding and bitter. Maybe. Hopefully not.

i feel like i want to go see the movie again. it was that good. yesterday i tried to convince my friend it was an awful movie, just to see what happens to a person who goes in with low expectations. because i went with high expectations and was absolutely blown away. he didn't believe me though, and eventually i caved in anyway.

i'm really happy to have found K's blog. she's so wacKy. i remember i used to read her old page and it would cracK me up every time.

in 8 days i'll be going to Las Vegas to see my family again. i'm getting excited now. i can't wait to see my brother again, i miss him so much! i keep thinking he will be a different person now, all grown up like. i haven't seen him since July. It's been over 5 months, definitely the longest time we've ever been apart. i'm also excited to see my parents' new digs, it's supposed to be quite a house.. bigger than the one we have here. and i'll get to try driving stick on my dad's matrix -- that should also be fun. best of all, the average temperature there is 15 C during the day! whoop whoop whoop!

"epic"

Last night I went to see The Last Samurai with nathan, drew, kenric and sam. My favorite type of movies are those that are of "epic" proportions.

The Last Samurai was such a movie.

The Last Samurai was easily the best movie I have seen since Gladiator. The story was amazing, heroic, riveting even. The geographical scenes were beautiful, the acting was solid, and I have to say that I was at the edge of my seat through the whole movie. The protagonist went through a life-changing experience.

To sum it up, the directors/actors of this movie (set in Japan) took the best out of movies like Braveheart, Gladiator and Dances with Wolves and created a masterpiece!

Go watch it!

contract extended!

Today I finally got news of my contract extension. For those of you who missed it, on November 26 2003, my contract with the City of Toronto concluded. However, my supervisor had already put in a request to have me extended another year, so HR granted me a 3 week temporary extension while we waited for the paperwork to be cleared. This 3 week period ended today.

Because of the City's hiring freeze the request took longer than expected, and there was worries that it might not work out because of budgeting and political reasons. But today I contacted HR and after a few hours of deliberation, they've officially extended me until the end of June 30, 2004.

Congratulations, eBrian!

During this time of contemplating my future I've thought a lot about why/why not, why would I be extended and why wouldn't I be. The bottom line is, whether or not I was or wasn't was part of God's will for me. His plan, for now, is for me to stay with the City.

God is good? All the time.
All the time? God is good.

song

i heard this song on the radio and then saw the video on muchmusic. it's called Stacey's Mom. the tune is really catchy, and the words are absolutely hilarious.. check it out if you get a chance. it's about some kid who has a crush on his classmate's mom!

i've decided that i want to organize some kind of weekly or bi-weekly downtown lunch, for people in all our small groups. i think it would be really great, to have such a gathering. in Ottawa my friends and I would meet every week on a friday and go out for lunch and just fellowship. until now i hadn't realized that quite a few of us work downtown.

why, just the other day i ran into Zee, and i know that anita and eric both work downtown. That's already 4 of us.

today i chatted briefly with my dad and grandmother on yahoo. the first thing she uttered to me was whether i had a girlfriend yet. boo. me not like that..

today

i believe i've finally lost my mind today. yesterday, i spotted a bill i need to pay that was due today, and i made a mental note to pay it today. after 2 hours of searching, i cannot find this bill. is it possible i'm mixing reality with my dreams?

although i did basically nothing today, i'm so exhausted. bruce says it's because i'm getting old.

this morning i woke up at 7:50am, then again at 9:30am. i played computer, as usual, then at around 11:30ish i got ready and went to pick up Bruce from his place. we had lunch together at Asian Legend restaurant. it was yum-yum :) on the drive back to my place, i had to turn right, and there were a lot of cars, and no one was letting me in, until finally someone let me through. it was Karen! i waved hello to her, and she waved back!

the rest of the day was spent playing all my gamecube games, some more diablo, and just chatting. Bruce has changed a lot and seems to have learned a lot from his experiences of being unemployed, in a manner of speaking. as a graduate of comp. eng, driving a school bus for a living must be such a humbling experience, yet he does it, and serves food on weekends. i felt very humbled, almost ashamed while we talked, since i was living in such luxury. he described his bedroom, it was like the size of my bathroom :(

i know that i shouldn't feel sorry for God's blessings, but sometimes i feel almost embarrassed when i invite people over because of what i have. a lot of time jokingly i complain about little petty things, maybe to get a laugh or just cuz i feel like it. i really take things for granted and only really notice them when people point out to me that i'm so "lucky".

my cousin (roastduck) gave me some advice today. he said that rather than trying to change/improve myself in order to impress another person, i should only be worried about changing myself in order to impress God.

i hate that i'm such a procrastinator. people ask me, how's work going? I tell them, same old. the fact of the matter is, i have a ton of stuff due next friday, and i'm only a 3rd of the way finished. it's this crazy, live by the moment or die trying attitude that i have when it comes to getting things done. as if to think i'm actually going turn in quality stuff at the last minute. I'm not even a good finisher, or let's just say i'm not the type who "steps up" under pressure.

so to tell people i'm not really busy at work isn't true, i'm not busy because i choose to be *EXTREMELY* busy next week. so for those i've told that work has been uneventful, i'm sorry but i lied through my teeth.

i met up with gladys for lunch, we ate in the food court. everyone pray that she does well on her exam, she's got an exam tomorrow (err.. today). i'm still pretty confused about the whole thing but it's like her first of a bunch of exams for her CA. i wish you the best gladys!

i've got this friend named "xing", but we call him Bruce because okay, let me start from the beginning. at Mac, in my first and second years I lived in Edwards Hall. Now Edwards Hall was the only all-guys dorm. but wait, there's more. this building was the oldest building on campus. apparently it came with a lot of tradition, and with it, a history of insane, brutal hazing, and a naming ceremony. anyway, when were there the hazing was gone but the naming was still there.

basically as frosh we lined up and one by one, blindfolded and brought into a room. when the blindfold was removed, i found myself sitting on a chair, surrounded by about 12 huge guys, all formed or current Edwards "elders". they gave me a book to sign, which is on display at parliament (or so they said). they looked at me, then they huddled up, and then one guy (who's name was "Stick"), turned to me and said: From now on, you will be known as Long Duck. (the whole time I kept thinking they were going to gang up and beat the crap outta me, so i just said "ok")

anyway, back to the story, my friend Xing was named "They Call Me Bruce", or TCMB for short. Thus his name became Bruce. The funny thing is, his name isn't Bruce, but to this day everyone calls him that, even non-Edwards people.

right so tomorrow (today) i'm gonna be hanging out with him. without Bruce, i might still be in first year engineering.. he really helped me out a lot that year.

my back pains are still there. before i got them just when sitting in front of a computer, but now i get them non-stop, lying down, standing, walking. and they're not only backpains now but also pulsating sudden sheer flashes of pain up the front of my chest as well. i'm not sure what it is exactly, but goodness gracious does it ever hurt!

1:06am

at 10pm, i felt really tired and went back to my computer to check email. at 11:30pm, I finally went to bed. Yet, it's 1:06am and I'm wide awake. I was lying in bed, tossing and turning, unable to figure out why i couldn't sleep, so went back and turned my computer back on and here i am blogging again. tick tock..

1:08am

my back hurts. i think it's from the way i sit/sleep on the subway. i finally found a way that i can sleep without working that my body will fall over the person beside me. (i can't think of anything more humiliating and embarrassing, on a subway, than falling over someone while sleeping). i've had people push me back, or even wake me and tell me to stop. that's worst.. anyway, now i just bend forward and my head droops down to my knees. but because of the way my back arches, well i guess i'm straining it. anyway, my back hurts now.

1:17am

i'm gonna try sleeping again. good nite all.

today's PDL entry was textbook, trusting in God even during the tough times, and praising Him always, even when you are down. although it sounds hard to praise God when you feel like He's turned against you, to me it isn't hard at all. maybe the worst i've been in to end up praying pleading/questioning why it was happening to me, but i don't think i've been to point where i would stop giving Him praise!

after work today at 4pm, we had our Christmas party. it was good fun! I had a beer and some pretty good wings, enough for dinner which is what I was aiming for. I played a few games of pool, foosball, and hockey (no, not real hockey -- bubble hockey). my old boss who had left in September to get his MPA came back to visit us. it was great seeing him!

my current supervisor begged me to stay, because it was only 7:30 when i left. he told me that all the single ladies come out on thursdays, and i, a single guy, should capitalize on this. he pointed out it's not like my dad is at home waiting for me.

i don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that i was rushing home to watch Friends and Survivor, or that i actually considered his offer... LOL