trades galore!

I've never seen trading like this before. We are literally hours away from the draft folks, and even tonight I'm not sure who's going to be taken after the first 4.

For certain, the top 4 are:

1. Dwight Howard
2. Emeka Okafor
3. Luol Deng
4. Shaun Livingston

After that, things get cloudier. Dallas traded for the 5th overall pick. I have no idea what this means.. Dallas doesn't have any glaring needs, the team is stacked. Haha.. no pun intended (they traded for Jerry Stackhouse). Trading for Stackhouse doesn't make sense unless they plan on trading Finley away. Maybe the deal will be Walker, Howard, Finley for Shaq? This is unbelievable.. What is Mark Cuban up to?

I could see them taking a natural point in Devin Harris, and possibly trading him off in part of the deal for Shaq. Or maybe to replace Nash who might bolt? This is just unbelievable.. this Dallas trade totally messes up any of my projections. Here are my guesses:

5. Devin Harris
6. Andre Iguodala
7. Luke Jackson
8. Ben Gordon (haha.. still holding out hope for this)

There's no way Toronto is going to get Ben Gordon. Looks like Pavel Podkolzine to me. Or Andris Biedrins. Or Josh Smith. I can't think of anyone else we could take besides these guys. Raptors are going to trade down tomorrow night, not sure where. They could still get Jameer Nelson down at 12-15. Or trade further down and get Telfair.

blog

I haven't really done the "log" part of blogging lately.. all sports, nothing interesting for most of yous.

My current contract ends on June 30. It's got me kind of thinking about it, just in terms of what would happen if it weren't extended. There's like zero chance of that happening -- no, my faith isn't THAT strong -- but they've slotted me work for next month already. I'm training most of the users for the system.. like 500 people. Who's gonna do that if I'm not around? They need eBrian! The world needs eBrian!

Still, even if they want me back, it's still up to upper management and BUDGETING, that makes the final determination of whether or not I continue. My supervisor discussed with me about a possible job opening sometime in September that I will be able to apply for, Business Analyst (exactly what I've been dreaming about since before I even graduated). He said they'd even make the job descriptions and requirements exactly the same fitted for me and what I have been doing.

Otherwise, not much else going on. I deceived a bunch of people on COH, it's a long story but the gist of it is I lied to them so badly, and did something completely and totally UNTHINKABLE in the gaming world, and I feel so guilty about it that I may never play the game again.

Some good news: My bro is coming to visit me in August, which means we get to go to the MercyMe concert together! I am so excited about that (my bro visiting, not the concert!). I miss him so much.. Btw, he kicked ass on his SATs recently!

Our house is going to be sold officially on the 29th (closing date). It's sad to see it go, but also glad the headaches will be gone, finally.

Anyway.. how's that for a brief update. More to come, as I hear it!

draft

I'm going with Kenric to the draft party at Air Canada Centre on Thursday. We'll get free food and drinks, and possibly meet Chris Bosh. I also want to start a "FIRE PEDDIE" chant, if possible. After last night's Clippers-Bobcats trade I'm a bit disappointed. I don't think the Raptors will get Ben Gordon now. We'll probably end up with Devin Harris, or worse, Biedrins.

That really sucks. Last year Andris Biedrins played against Darko Milicic, "The Human Victory Cigar", and was MASHED. Darko scored like 40 points and 20 rebounds, while Biedrins managed like 4 points and 7 rebounds.

Devin Harris is okay, but.. Actually if Gordon is taken I hope the Raptors just trade down, screwing over the Trailblazers and take Sebastian Telfair, or just trade down for a vet and Jameer Nelson.

Sigh..

poetry

Kenric sent me this site a while ago, I downloaded the songs and they're actually pretty good. I like the song We Miss You.

This song goes out to the innocent men, women and children
Who've lost their lives in the homicide bombings in Israel
Just wanna let you know that who ever you are, where ever you are
Guess what, we miss you

[verse 1]
Days pass by, things won't change
The lives we've lost, memories remain
Locked in our hearts, the friends not here
Our parents, teachers, even school piers
Lives cut short in clubs, cafes
Buses, malls, on them Jewish holidays
Jewin their thing, mindin their own business
Hebrews are peaceful, can I get a witness?
Land of that milk and honey
Spirit valued more than money
Value God and we value love
Now we give our props to the ones above
Miss you daily and it's hard to move on
But you lift our spirit when we hear this song
To all the Heeb crew, let us not forget
They're talking to us now when we hear this set

[verse 2]
We'd like to turn back time
Prevent the loss, prevent the crime
But all we can do is to live the day
Lead tomorrow in our own Jew righteous way
Embrace the Torah, embrace our kin
Somehow we'll overcome and yes we'll win
Cause crimes like these don't go unturned
They'll either change their ways or about to get burned
Tzadikim that's you, the ones above
Died for us, now we're showin you the love
Remind us who we are and what we stand for
Jews rich at heart that's why we're never poor
You each had faith, you each had dreamed
Hoped for peace, even hard as it seemed
But now we praise you and kiss you back
Remember you always when we hear this track

Hillsong United - More To Life

I bought this cd awhile ago, but haven't commented on it.

It's a great CD. I sampled through it prior to the Hillsong United concert I went to, just to familiarize myself with some of the songs so that I could at least attempt to sing along at the concert.

I don't know what it is about Hillsong United that makes me feel so happy. They are the same as Hillsongs, in that the songs are often our offering to God, conveyances of love and appreciation between us and our Holy Savior. The difference being most other songs are "about God", not about our relationship with Him. That think that's what initially attracts anyone to Hillsongs.

I lay my life down at Your feet
You're the only one I need
I turn to You and You are always there
In trouble times, it's you I seek
I put You first that's all I'll need
I humble all I am, all to You

But with Hillsong United, songs are uplifting, and appeal to a younger crowd by lyrics and also by tune. Led by the new generation of the rock-style Christian genre, these group of guys (and 1 girl) are leaders in Christian Praise Rock. They recognize the need that young people have to be able to relate with something before truly believing in something. Hillsong United makes praising God cool -- and fun! Which I think is great..

I don't care what they say about me
It's alright, alright
I don't care what they think about me
It's alright
They'll get it one day

I love You, I'll follow You
You are my, my life
I will read my bible and pray
I will follow you all day

Anyway, I give this CD two thumbs up, a solid 9.5/10. My only (personal) beef with it is that you can easily lose your voice while singing along to it. Especially if you blast it as I do on my car. :)

part 5

Part 5 of Yetisports: Flamingo Drive is out!

ARRRGGGOOOOOOOOOOSSS

Yesterday I went to watch the CFL season opener with Kenric. It was my first experience watching live football, which is far and away my favorite sport to watch. To me, the CFL is a total joke, having players that couldn't make it anywhere else -- a league that made superstars out of NFL failures.

However, the game was actually pretty entertaining. It started out with a bang (literally, lots of fireworks) and the Sasketchewan Roughrider's starting quarterback broke his leg. And from there, it was all downhill for them. The backup guy threw interception after interception. And I called two touchdowns. Just after the injury I told Kenric I thought they would score, and they did, on the ensuing punt. Then later on I said it again, and Damon Allen throws a 50 yard TD.

Here are some pics from the game. I learned some new features with my camera, like what WB stands for (which I forgot by now, though I know the point of it at least).


SkyDome is still quite a sight. Hard to believe people think the Jays need a new stadium!


Pretty good turn out, for a lowly CFL game. Haha.. Actually the fans were really into it, there are a lot of hardcore Argo fans..


Half-time Show: No wardrobe malfunctions tonight! MASS PIPE BAND!


Damon Allen huddles together with the troops. Argos win, 21-10.

hurray for competition!

Today, I received 3 more Gmail invites. I got 3 more last week which I gave to my co-workers, who were drooling over my original invite and my first 2 invites. I felt after rubbing it in their faces it was time to cough them up :)

Anyway, 3 more today, and I sent myself one so I could have a real email address (finally), at brian.yao@gmailREMOVE.com (cut out REMOVE for the real address). <-- I learned my lesson this time, bp!

So yeah, 2 more invites if anyone needs.

And then, I logged into Yahoo mail today to discover they changed their mailbox size to 100 MB, plus their maximum email size is now 10mb! Went on over to Hotmail, and nothing. Uh-oh!

luke jackson

I read this interview between Luke Jackson and one of the writers at DraftCity.com, a week ago. He seemed very intelligent and as a player who stayed in college, seemed very poised and confident. Needless to say I was very impressed by the attitude he displayed, and his tactful answers.

Anyway, why I brought this up, it reminds me of many years ago when I read about the 3 big QBs -- the year of Couch, Culpepper, McNabb (also in that draft was Cade McNown and Akiki Smith). I think it's unfair to think Couch has failed as a QB. Playing for an expansion club has severe downsides because you are always dealing with personnel changes and it literally takes years to establish a good offensive line. Anyway, I remember reading this article about the big 3, and how despite Culpepper being the best athlete of the 3, it was McNabb who scored the highest marks in the aptitude/intelligence tests.

Although McNabb struggled earlier on in his career compared to the massive leaps and bounds Culpepper pulled earlier in his career, we now see McNabb as being the true winner. The guy who is leading his team into the playoffs, and really garnering a lot of MVP support.

Anyway, I just wanted to say this because it just says a lot about intelligence and poise, moreso than pure athletic ability (not that Donovan McNabb isn't an amazing physical specimen). Emeka Okafor finished his college degree in just 3 years, and is projected to go first or second. I'm slowly beginning to think 2nd, simply because Orlando needs to watch their "backs" -- literally, since McGrady also has a history of back problems. Haha.. bad pun. So yeah, Luke Jackson should hit top 12-15 I think.. he's should shoot up the draft boards of teams know what they're doing!

edit: Oh yeah, just wanted to add a blurb about Cade McNown, wherever he is. Cade: You saved me more than a few times in your rookie season. (It's a good thing my league didn't count INTs) I dunno what happened to you, but if you could've shored up your off-field problems you could have had a pretty solid NFL career. Just look at Jake Plummer, he sucks ass and he's still in the league, and you were better than he is.

storm

What a storm last night! There was thunder and lightning, and when it rains, because of the high winds up top, it always sounds like hail. I woke up several times in the middle of the night. It even woke up my gp's at 2 in the morning! I think my grandfather was scared or something.

I woke up this morning to find the Lakers had lost again, but for some reason I still feel like they can win the series. They still haven't played well as a team, yet, in these playoffs. Kenric posed a question to me about whether I thought they were playing poorly because they're distracted, or because I think it's Detroit's defense. I still don't think Detroit is as good as any teams in the West, and the Lakers beat everyone in the West. So do I think it's the defense? I guess part of it is, but still, Kobe has only shot well in one game, which they won. If it's defense, then you just don't get off as many shots. If Kobe is still being allowed to jack up 30 shots in a game, it's more him that the defense.

mercy me

Gladys bought me Word Of God Speak - The Worship Songs of MercyMe as a return favor of getting her tickets to the MercyMe concert. I must say this is a great book! It's got all the chords to a number of mercyme songs including sheet music and lyrics. It's just another reminder of the mistake I made quitting piano when I was younger..

Does anyone know how to play Bb2(no3)?

too much

I'm finding less and less time for myself. Of course it's partly my own fault for getting involved in too many activities, but I just feel like I'm being suffocated right now, never having any time to be alone. I kinda miss living at home with family, even though I hated it, I kinda miss mowing the lawn or vacuuming. Times like those I had all to myself, I would do the chore and think about so many different things while doing them.

Life's seems to be going too fast for me.

lamenting vs. complaining

complaining: Why me? Why are you putting me through this? I can't take this anymore, it's all your fault!

lamenting: Oh man, this really sucks.

onions

Every time I cook, I use onions, and every time I use onions, my hands smell funky afterwards. This smell will often last for days, no matter how much soaking and soaping I do with my hands. It's really annoying.. If anyone knows the remedy for this, please tell me!

rabbits

Some people think I'm just kidding around with the rabbits. I wasn't at the time, but now that I think more about it, it's a lot more work really than one might realize. It's not about a piece of land either, you need a barn most likely. Apparently it's best to have raised cages so that there is no urine build up, it gets collected under the cages. And you need a good ventilation system set up too.

It is however, legal in Canada and there are quite a few rabbit farms in the Northern parts of Canada. Few people know this, but early pioneers ate strictly rabbits, way before they started eating beef, pork or poultry. Rabbit meat is a lot more nutritious that any other of the meats, it's lean and very high in protein.

Anyway, I sure most of my regular readers are more grossed out than interested in this stuff, but if you do have any questions I can pass on some interesting sites and resources -- just email me and ask. In the meantime, I will not be persuing this any further because the initial start-up costs are actually quite a lot more than I had originally anticipated.

this sunday

I've been looking forward to this Sunday for about 3 days now, ever since I decided I was going to and buy some Fanta, something I haven't done since last fall. I love Fanta. There's something about the precious nectar of berry goodness. When you take a gulp, it's like nothing you've ever experienced.. It's just so yummy. Gosh I'm mouth is watering up right now while thinking about it.

potter

I watched Harry Potter 3 yesterday. Liked it a lot. Lots of funny (brilliant!) parts and also scary parts. I can't figure out how old he's supposed to be now though, they seem pretty mature but then you see the way that red-haired kid acts around his pet rat and you think they're like 5 again. Maybe the other two are older and he's much younger but tall? I dunno. It had some really cool storylines and neat effects.

phone

I'm really loving my new phone. Its color screen begs to be looked at, to be fiddled with. Mmm.. pretty colors.. I can't seem to go more than an hour without flipping it open to gaze and the wonderful tones and lights. And everytime I flip it open I can't help but think like I'm some kind of stock broker.. Haha.

more spends

The jedi-master insists that the Hoobastank cd is worth getting, so I'm considering it now. There's a number of CDs that I'm looking to get, secular ones. Creed is one that I should've bought a long time ago. I think I've listened to that one enough times that I should just send them money without even getting a cd.

major purchase

None of the above count as major purchases. I haven't made a major purchase since Christmas time, when I bought my Olympus Stylus 400. Could it be time for a new one? I had one recent mass spending, which was when I paid for the fixing of my basement, which fetched a hefty sum, but I hope to be paid back soon for that. And it doesn't count anyway, I'm talking about purchase for me. ME!

One thing I've thought a lot about was buying a piece of land. And maybe a few cows to breed. I think that'd be a lot of fun, I could go every day after work, make sure they were being well fed, and then go home. In a few years I'd have many cows. I could sell their milk, and eventually sell their flesh, and skin for clothing. It would be good fun.. Or maybe that might take too long.

Perhaps a small patch of land and rabbits. They breed pretty fast and I've read their meat is actually quite delicious. And I could sell their feet.. some crazies out there actually think they bring good luck.

It's definitely something to think about.

Bird: You know the one thing that always bothered me when I was playing in the NBA was, I really got irritated when they put a white guy on me. I still don't understand why.

(laughter)

Bird: A white guy would come out, I would always ask him, 'What, do you have a problem with your coach? Did your coach do this to you?' And he would say, 'No,' and I'd say, 'Come on, you got a white guy coming out here to guard me; you got no chance.' And for some reason, that always bothered me when I was playing against a white guy."

...and he was dead serious, not so much as a grin or anything. Just straight up said it, as though he meant every word. Everyone else (Jim Gray, Magic Johnson, Carmelo Anthony, Lebron James) was laughing, but he was deadpanned. Pretty funny stuff..

Btw, and I pretty much stand by this: If Charlotte takes Iguodala, everything should fall into place and Raptors should get Gordon. I forgot that Washington really likes Childress.. but I also think they need a big man. Anyway, Ben Gordon, if he comes to the Raptors, will win rookie of the year.

Mock Draft

This is my favorite time of the year in the NBA, when the Finals are going on and less that 3 weeks away from the NBA Draft. I absolutely LOVE analysing and trying to predict who will go where, and learning about each of the players. No doubt that this thing will cause many of you to go "HUH?!", or think "gosh, you sure have a lot of time on your hands..."! I really wanted to put this in a table format, but this will have to do for now.

1. Orlando: Emeka Okafor - This is really a no-brainer. Back spasms and all he is hands down the best player in the draft.
2. Atlanta: Dwight Howard - Atlanta will trade up to take this hometown highschool phenom, who looks to be like a cross between a Tim Duncan and a Kevin Garnett (ie: a mean Duncan with ball-handling skills).
3. Chicago: Luol Deng - To me he's the consensus #3 pick. Chicago is basically set at PF/C with Chandler/Curry or will be, after trading one of them. Don't forget they also still have AD.
4. Charlotte: Andre Iguodala - Iguodala has been shooting up the charts after his latest workout. He is an extremely well-conditioned athlete with great skills and can literally do it all out on the court, and is the perfect type of player for the new franchise to build around.
5. Washington: Andris Biedrins - Kwame Brown is done.
6. Clippers: Shaun Livingston - Here's where it gets tricky. LAC trades down to take a point guard? I know it's wishful thinking that they'd pass on Gordon but it does make sense as they want a kid who will pass first, given that they already have established scorers on their team..
7. Phoenix: Pavel Podkolzine - Pavel should have declared last year, he wasted an entire season in the Italian league and basically did nothing in the past year. He could have been raking it in all this time. If he pans out, he and Amare Stoudamire will make a formidable frontcourt for the Suns.
8. Toronto: Ben Gordon - Ben Gordon is the next Baron Davis. Yes, you heard it here first. This guy has Baron Davis written all over him. They're both BIG guards, love to shoot first and are ridiculed for being somewhat of a ball hog. They both play great defense, and are lethal from 3-pt range. The game comes naturally for both of them.
9. Philadelphia: Josh Smith - Just makes sense to take this guy who for now will supplant Glenn Robinson, but in the future will we asked to score instead of Iverson.
10. Cleveland: Josh Childress - Cleveland is just looking for grounded players who have a solid game so as to not ruin the already great chemistry on this team. Childress was the leader of his Stanford squad and is a fairly mature player, despite what you might think when you see his hair.
11. Golden State: Kirk Snyder - Really at this point I could care less about who gets taken. I see that the Warriors need a SG/SF and to me it's down to Kirk, Luke Jackson, Sergei Monya.. so take your pick.
12. Seattle: Peter John Ramos - Ramos is another one of those tall kids who has shot up the rankings, really for no good reason other than he is an okay player who happens to be really tall. With Calvin Booth as their only legitimate C, Ramos just makes sense.
13. Portland: Devin Harris - It's hard to believe Harris falling this far but I am basing this edition of my mock draft on need, and none of the above teams after Toronto really needs a point guard. It would've been Telfair here but that dude is dropping like a brick after recent workouts.
14. Utah: Dorell Wright - This one comes out from left field. A highschooler, virtually unknown. He will be at the slam dunk competition, if he gets drafted and gets 10-15 minutes per game. If there's a human highlight reel in this draft class, it's him. Utah needs that kind of player, to attract the fans. I mean sure Kirilenko is no slouch, but wait til you see this kid dunk..!
15. Boston: Jameer Nelson - I think Boston would have wanted Wright, or they might take JR Smith here. It's really unfair that a player like Jameer Nelson gets overlooked in the draft. He's really a great leader and in terms of floor generals he is the best in this class -- but he's tiny. I think he'd mesh really well with Mr. "Heart on his sleeve" Paul Pierce.

Other notables: Utah takes Swift, LAC takes Araujo, NOH takes Jackson, Miami gambles on Telfair, Nuggets take JR Smith.

I've revised this thing about 40 times in the last 3 days and I think it might stand. Of course workouts are still going on, teams cut deals with kids and rumors fly, and so this is a "mock" draft in every sense of the word.

IF Toronto gets Ben Gordon, we will be contenders in the East once again. Babcock has seen first hand what a different a scoring point guard can make with Cassell in Minnesota. I mean basically you're getting Cassell and Hudson in one player. I can't see how Babcock could pass on him if he's there.

flames, lightning

I haven't really commented much about the Stanley Cup Finals, with good reason -- I haven't watched a single game yet. But tonight I plan on watching Game 7. I know that a lot of you are cheering for the Calgary Flames, and rightfully so as they are "Canada's" team this year, and we finally have a shot at bringing the Cup home.

Although I guess I'll be cheering for Calgary since Jarome Iginla is one of my favorite non-Leaf players, I'll be equally happy for either team winning it.

The Tampa Bay Lightning are full of Canadian players, including their best player Martin St.Louis, Vincent Lecavalier, and a player who is quite dear to my heart -- former Toronto Maple Leaf, Dave Andreychuk.

Dave Andreychuk was a part of what I consider the glory years, the days of Doug Gilmour. Those years we had the closest shot at reaching the Stanley Cup finals out of any of the past few Sundin-led years. If you really think about it, the only real highlight in the last 5 years has been eliminating Ottawa -- outside of that we have had little or no chance of making it to the Finals.

Andreychuk was awesome for us.. He's 40 years old now, and looking for his first Cup. He holds a dubious record for playing the most NHL games without winning a Stanley Cup. He's the Karl Malone of hockey.

So anyway, like I said, between seeing Jarome Iginla hoist the cup and Dave Andreychuk, either is good for me -- although Jarome probably has a shot for many years to come, while Andreychuk is probably done after this season.

idiot

like the idiot that i am, i forgot to pay my credit card bill for like the umpteenth time, and this time i have to really pay for it.

my free month's subscription ended this weekend for City of Heroes, and I was supposed to start paying today in order to pay ($20/month). But, as I mentioned this idiot forgot to pay his credit card overdue bills -- which was like a paltry $14 -- and now I won't get to play for at least another 3-5 days!

CRIPES!!

of course this means my guitar practicing will benefit greatly..

btw, thanks to jasy: i stole your code and altered it so that i could show 3 at once.. hehe. finally made use of my degree :)

more heroes

A few days ago I stopped working on Lion-Oh and made a guy who looks like a tiny monkey. I wanted to called him Curious George, but the game wouldn't let me use the word "Curious". (At level 15 you get a new title, like "The Amazing" or "The Extraordinary", etc. And I think "Curious" might be one of the choices.) So anyway, I went with Kyrios George, giving somewhat of a double meaning as our church's teen fellowship is called Kyrios.

Kyrios George is an illusion controller / healer. I run around and get into trouble, and try to bail out other people in need. It's pretty fun, very different game dynamic than going in and arresting (killing) everything in sight as I was with Lion-Oh, who was a spines scrapper. Now I manipulate the enemy into attacking themselves, or healing and revive fellow heroes in the city. It's actually quite fun being an 'assister' rather than the offense.

Here's a few more funny pics I took along my travels:


I played with Annie for only around 15 minutes while I tried to level up. She was funny though, kept yelling "Tomorrow!" after every arrest.


This guy was great, didn't play with him but saw him hanging around City Hall. He was doing jumping jacks at one point, and yelling out "YMCA!" over and over. LOL!!

hoobastank

The first time I heard this song "The Reason" was months ago during a highlight reel on Roger's Sportsnet. They played the song while showing hockey highlights and then I found myself humming it hours later. Had no idea who sang it, or what the song was about.

Then recently while flipping through the stations I saw the music video, realized what it was about (weird how the lyrics are so different from the video). I really like this song, it's got a great tune, guitar solo part sounds easy enough that I might be able to play. Lyrics are nice.

Anyway.. it took me like 2 weeks to figure out the name of the group. Hoobastank.. what the heck is that?


Oh yeah, today I picked up a new cell phone, trading in my beloved T206 for an LG 6070. The T206 is, in my mind, still the best phone ever offered by Telus. It's large and bulky, looks like a women's phone, but the reception is better than any phone I have ever used, often comparable to my cordless phone at home. You will be missed, T206.

eBrian's brush with stardom, PART II

Well, it all started after work.. No seriously, today as I was putting on my jacket to get ready to go home I looked out the window and noticed they were filming something out in front of Metro Hall. So I made a point to walk outside to the subway station in order to see what was going on.

Outside, they were filming something, there was a Lincoln parked there, with a camera, and a whole bunch of white screens. There were two of those cool 'actors' chairs. There was this woman dressed in a red blazer/skirt thing with tall lace boots. She was pretty. I stared for awhile before I realized it was Heather Graham. I was kinda surprised actually how pretty she was, before I remembered she was probably all done up for the movie and hence, seeing some movie star "in person" was still the same as seeing them on the big screen -- if they were working.

Anyway, we were all standing around, us Torontonians until the director told us to move out of the way because he didn't want us in the film. So a group of them (comprised mostly of young teenage girls), moved out of the way and I started walking towards the subway.

Then I remembered akt works right there too so I called her to tell her what was going on. And then I called a co-worker who was still upstairs.

Later I heard that they were filling a movie called "Cake", and apparently Sandra Oh was in it too (although I may have heard that incorrectly).

Exciting stuff!

Misadventures of eBrian

Misadventures of eBrian

So there I was, lying on the side of the road when I woke up from my daily nap on the subway after work. Many thoughts sprang into my mind. Is this a dream? Where am I? How did I get here? I stood up and realized that everything had been taken from me. I'd been robbed, (everything was gone except my keys), probably while I was lying there, or maybe they robbed me and then just left me on the side of the road to die. I don't know. I had nothing left..

I'm not exactly sure what happened next but I sort of just started stumbling along the side of the road. Cars whizzed by and didn't seem to even notice me, I just sorta walked along the side, unsure of whether to stick my thumb out or just keep walking. Tripped on something and fell, and then when I woke up again I was lying in some sort of a puddle or something, no longer near the street. It wasn't blood or anything like that.. nor sewage. But it stunk pretty bad.

Some funny looking old guy was standing over me asking if I need help. I think mumbled to him that I was fine (he looked kinda freaky), and he kind of stood there looking at me funny, shrugged, and walked away.

When I got up it must've been really late, it was all dark outside but I could sort of make out the CN Tower off in the distance so I started walking in that direction. I guess you could say I started walking towards the light (lol).

At that point I started to vaguely remembered what had happened to me between the time I fell and the time the old man was over me. I had noticed that I was fairly unscathed and started running, climbed over a fence, and generally felt pretty good about myself that I'd survived getting robbed and abandoned. But then I tripped on some mangled pieces of a muffler or something, and I slid off into a ravine area. I also remembered being carried some place, by a couple or group of people, all dressed in white. It could've been a dream but I doubt it.. you don't just come up with stuff like that out of the blue!

Anyway.. I wandered for what felt like an eternity but eventually found my way into some neighborhood, found a taxi driver who took pity on me and drove me home. When I got home, I snuck in to make sure I didn't wake my grandparents, went straight to the washroom and showered. I thought about calling the police but I figured what was the point? So i called Visa instead, cancelled my credit card, and called my bank to freeze my accounts. And here I am blogging again, after all that craziness.

I guess thinking back on the whole thing, it was pretty crazy.. I mean sure my story is entirely fiction. Well, metaphorically it sort of describes my ride from the past week. But the bottom line is I'm back. Maybe not at full strength, but I'm back nonetheless. Please continue to check both blogs though, as I do intend on continuing on with both, more likely the other one, and leaving silly things and venting on this one.

As someone very wise once told me, you can't always be serious and you can't always be humorous, otherise you lose your audience.

Some 2004 T3C Summer Conference pics:





Welcome!



Ryan



Tracy and Gladys, barely awake



Kenric copying Anita (plagiarism!)



This makes me extra proud to be a software engineer



Racoon.. look how skinny it is! Poor lil thing!



Somehow this 15 minute trail turned into a 45 min trail.. (that's ben btw)



Random people, but they look pretty happy don't they?



Is there anything Vic can't do?



I almost died from 1 bite of this.



Free haircut!



Ken, Kenric, Daniel, Olivia.. and possibly Tim Tang?



Best song ever!

I'm sick..

I think the turning point yesterday was when we approached the Bayview/Yonge/Allen exit, I was so tired that I was about to tell GY to just forget the PacMall idea and just drive me straight home.

Something compelled me to keep quiet. Maybe it was the computer geek inside me that wanted a new harddrive so I could play games again.

Circling the Pac Mall parking lot, I swear I think my bladder was about to burst, although it was funny realizing that G is one of those drivers that many of my friends complain about. I marvelled at her driving skills, but also am very fearful that one day someone's going to angrily jump out of their car and go ballistic on her.

Then we were in the mall, all the while I had a larger and larger urge to ralph. It was all adding up, the sick feeling in my stomach, the conference food, the sheer numbers in the mall, and then, from herbal shops, tea shops, bakeries -- a gigantic culmination of smells -- that were making me so noxious that I was "| |" (this) close to hurling.

Me thinking, 'gosh darn, how could there be so many cell phone stores in one single mall?'

My next post will detail the actual conference, with pictures.

wake up!

Do you guys use an alarm to wake up? I don't. I set my alarm for 7am just in case by some miracle I sleep past that time. I was up at 4:55 today.

hillsong united

Last night, I went to the Hillsong United Live concert at the Queensway Cathedral, with Kevin and char. Most people haven't heard of them, because they are really suited more for a younger crowd. Lon was the one who first introduced me to them, from a song called "God is Moving". I suppose also that the original Hillsongs leaders overshadow these group of guys in infammy.

They follow along with the Hillsongs tradition of singing a lot about God and me, what He does for me, what He stands for, the personal relationship. The only different is they're pretty wild, very loud, very ROCKin'. And they put on a great show.. I think the best way to describe it is that their combination of lyrics and music stirs something inside you that is really hard to describe.

Oh and last thing is their youth pastor, he was great. He looked like an australian Owen Wilson. He preached between the music, and did a really great job. He was hilarious too, his impersonation of the Crocodile Hunter was sooo funny! And he quoted the part when Gladiator (re)introduces himself to Caesar in the colisseum,

"My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius,
Commander of the Armies of the North,
General of the Felix Legions,
Loyal servant to the true emperor,
Marcus Aurelius.

Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife.
And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next."

As Christians, we need to know who we are, when we face the enemy. Wild at Heart uses the same comparison.. I wonder if he's read it? =)

I'm sooo tired today. I went to bed late, and then this morning the alarm went off in our building at 5:30. So I got about 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep. 4 hours!

Last night I played COH with the founder of the SuperGroup I belong to (it's basically a clan). The games got this cool feature where basically a higher level character can give a lower character "sidekick" status. As a Sidekick, you are endowed the stats of a player one level below the leader. So I got to play at level 19, even though I was really only 12. Anyway, this allowed us to go out and fight enemies that normally I'd be killed instantly by.

The disadvantage of course is I don't get as much experience as they do, when we fight the enemies.. and, if he gets too far away from me, I switch back to normal (and that can be very bad).

It never ceases to amaze who I'm playing with sometimes. I mean obviously you automatically assume that it's all teenagers. My dad is always criticizing me about why I still play games, when I'm supposed to be an adult now. "You're 25 years old now Brian, time to grow up."

So there I was playing, and at about 6:30, the buffer (boosts people with defenses) guy says "brb, gotta cook dinner for my boys", and then at around 9:30, the healer says "brb, putting the kids to bed". I swear I've played with at least a couple of new moms (complaints of babies crying), and mostly older parents ranging from 35-50 years of age.

It's just funny to me, not that it in any way justifies my immaturity, but just the fact that these parents spend their spare time so differently from my parents. I mean take my dad for instance. Whenever he had spare time when we were little, he was in the workshop, or on the computer drafting up something. My mom would be watching sitcoms, drawing/painting, or reading.

And these parents, are MMORPGing!

I just took a "How Hong Kong are you?" test, instead of going to bed like I should have. I scored 19%. To be honest, I doubt I'd even pass a "How Chinese are you?" test.

Summer Conference is rapidly approaching. Just 2 more days. I remember when I was little I used to get so excited for these things, I'd pack and be ready a week before. But then when as I got older, I'd wait longer and longer before I'd start packing. I was actually considering not packing at all, going with the clothes on my back, and my small man-purse. Oh, and a sleeping bag.. can't forget that.

Could always just buy clothes when I get there. Or go off into town and find a coin laundry :P

"I didn't invent the rainy day, I just own the best umbrella." -- Who said this, anyone remember? Jimmy Fallon, on Almost Famous.

Anyway.. I'd been thinking about that quote all day long, but I couldn't remember the first half of it. Just popped into my head finally.

I'm going to see United Live today. I've never seen them before. It should be pretty wild.. I like Jesus Generation, that's a good one. Their rendition of Jesus, Lover of my Soul is really good too. I've got a couple of their albums, but sometimes it depends on my mood, because they're pretty loud. I'm rambling now because my eyes are half closed. Hey, bedtime!

You wonder why I love this game so much.. take a look at this:


It's Santa!

troy

Not a bad movie. I mean, as a fan of the greek mythology stories, from that standpoint, it was interesting. And there was a good amount of violence and gratuitous bloodshed. The one and one battles were great. Brad Pitt was Brad Pitt, with some nude scenes, enough to keep the girlfriends in the theatre happy (although it's more likely they were the ones who dragged their boyfriends to see this one).

The movie has some great 'grandeur' scenes of massive armies, warfare, that sort of thing. I guess I would classify it as the first "epic" of the year, and first one I've seen in quite some time. The trouble with the movie was sometimes it dragged on, the romance was pretty cheesy, Orlando Bloom was improperly casted. He wasn't very convincing.. I mean sure Helene was good looking, but other than that I wasn't that convinced that he was in love with her.

Personally I thought the most interesting relationship was the one between Achilles and Perseus, I don't remember it from school. My favorite Greek character has always been Odysseus, and he was played by the guy who played Boromir in LOTR.

Well anyway, I give the movie a 7/10.

storage

Well.. it was bound to happen, and finally it has. My harddrive is dying. Today I transferred all the important stuff from my D and E drives to my C drive. D and E are the same physical drive partitioned into two. D was my games, which can of course be reinstalled. E drive was media.. all of which legal of course, so I can get back.

An entire gigabyte's worth of digital camera pictures, which to me was the most important thing from those two drives.. Memories from the last 4 years. My time at McMaster, Ottawa, Urbana, trip to China, graduation, Disney World, Baltic Sea, flooded basement, countless weddings..

It's hard to believe I never burned them to CD! I am *very* happy about my choice to have two physical harddrives now.. hehe

small group

This past Friday we wrapped up the book we've been reading -- Whatever Happened To Worship, by Tozer. I had a lot of trouble understanding the gist of each chapter, possibly due to his writing/speaking style, or perhaps I'm just dumb. But either way, it was good to discuss each of them and get a general feel about how everyone felt about the issues he dealt with. I felt that most of the stuff he said was pretty obvious, but I guess it was good to be reminded of many of those things.

During one session we talked about satan's temptations, and how easy it is snap at a co-worker.. actually I guess it was two things, that, and how satan puts thoughts into our heads and we get manipulated so easily.

First with the co-worker thing, I thought that I didn't do it, but today at work this guy left me a message and after I heard I thought to myself, 'omg.. this guy is so st..' and then I stopped myself and realized what I was doing. However, I've never really snapped at anyone at work, more just thought about it.

Second, our war with satan. Today's readings of Wild at Heart talked about the same thing, about the battle we face each and every day, and how satan is able to first send us a message, and that message slowly eats away at us, and how he gets us to doubt ourselves, cause descension, that sort of thing that leads us to sin.

The whole theme of the book has been to be a man, that is, to be a warrior and to stand up for ourselves, be like William Wallace: "All men die; few men ever really live.", and this part of the book kind of sums it up for me. Eldredge talks about the realization that we are in a battle, and to go to battle we need to be prepared. And how do we prepare ourselves -- by simply doing whatever brings me back to my heart and the heart of God.

I think that's the reason I've started reading again, because I've felt lately like I've been slipping. For whatever reason I've been feeling.. not so much sad or anything but, more like inadequate, or not good enough.

Rev. Stephen Yao

The funeral was fine. When I was there and sat down the first thing that I thought of (80% of the thing was in Cantonese, so I had a lot of time to think) was the Barenaked Ladies song "One Week", At that point I chuckled, not out loud.

How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad?
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
...

They say that when you die, your life flashes before you. At a funeral, that person's life flashes before you while you reflect on their passing. I remember sitting there thinking how lucky Rev. Yao was compared to me at that moment.. I smiled as I thought: 'He's up there now, and I'm still down here. He's up there with God. That's pretty sweet..'

Reverend Yao was a great guy, I remember all the times he would come over to me to ask how I was doing, even though I couldn't always understand everything he said to me, there was this genuine feeling I got that he really cared about how I was doing, how my brother was, and my family. One thing someone pointed out was that he knew everyone's names. He was a very loving man, very caring and genuine.

Reverend Yao liked to sing and he particularly enjoyed hymns. And he knew the bible inside and out. You know how some older chinese folk constantly quote 'idioms' throughout various daily activities? Rev. Yao would quote scripture constantly, he could apply anything in life to a verse. He was always offering insightful advice, no matter what the situation.

I remember the first day when he joined Milliken. We had a gathering at the old T3C building and he arrived after all the other guests. I remember he didn't look chinese to me, but he was a very friendly guy. Mrs. Yao was a very cheerful person, also very loving (and still is). I think he knew my name from that day forward.. I must've been like 7 years old. Wow, I can't believe I still remember that. I even remember playing on the playground that day. T3C (now TMCCC) had a great playground..

A lot of people broke down when they spoke about how Rev. Yao loved them and cared for them. It was during those times that I remembered how he impacted me and my family. It kind of hit me then that I knew him for so long and had forgotten how close he was to our family because we had switched churches.

Wow, now I'm depressed. It's good to reflect on these things. So why am I still up at 1 in the morning knowing that I have to be at church early for choir rehearsal? Because I just woke up from a nap. I slept from 7:23 til 12:34. The only reason I'm up is because of a wrong number call. The strange thing is he asked for "Brian", and I said "yes?", then he asked for "Judy" and I was like "huh?". That's weird.

Anyway it just makes me realize that there are so many important people in my life that I take for granted. People who God obviously placed in my life for a great reason but I fail to realize it until it's too late.

If I haven't said it to you (and I know that to most of you I haven't), but I love you all. Thank you for being a part of my life. Thanks for the rough times, for the lessons you have taught me, the funny moments we've been through.

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

In Christ, there are no goodbyes
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again

It's late, so I'll make this quick.

Tonight's game between the Lakers and Spurs was at times ugly, but wow, the talent on these teams leads me to have no doubt whatsoever that the winner of this series will win the NBA Championship. Ideally, I'd like that to be the Lakers, but Spurs could still pull off the miracle.

I need to clean my room. It is such a mess..

It occurred to me on Tuesday that mercyme songs were killing my voice. After singing along on the car on the way to church, I couldn't sing high at all during choir practice. The thing is Bart sings really high.. Didn't notice it til yesterday when I was driving mom to the airport, I was dozing off because of the slow traffic so I listened to Undone and sang along. No falsetto's, but practically was, I mean the songs are quite high.

I am not looking forward to this weekend at all. Sunday is another early morning, coupled with choir performance (I mean don't get me wrong, I enjoy doing it, but sometimes it gets a bit excessive, not to mention how early I have to wakeup). Of course there's the funeral on Saturday. Again, don't get me wrong, but I wouldn't exactly call a funeral an anti-depressant!

Right so anyway, it's late..

tix

Funny.. first Lon calls me to tell me he's downstairs (why does he always have to be so spontaneous?). Then some other folks invited me out to Ten Rens and I told them I was getting ready for bed. Here I am blogging and hour later.

I just ordered tickets to the MercyMe concert. They are in section 1000, which is the front section closest to the stage, but to the right of it. I wish I could have gotten the middle section, but you can't pick.

Two tickets are up for grabs I guess. (G: You want one right?) I'm not sure why I bought four, but I figured someone out there must like mercyme as well. Worst-case scenario, I can pawn them off to some Kyrios kids.

Ideally I'd like it if my brother can come visit me and we could watch the concert together.

I saw this interview of Bart and Mike, they talked about how they were so busy on tour that they'd write the music before the lyrics to songs. That's so weird.. and Bart writes all of the lyrics. All of them. The rest write the song, and then pass the music to Bart, and he pretty much sits there til he's inspired to write something. So all the words are his. That's kinda cool, but still weird that the music is done before the words.

Homesick was actually written for a relative of his who died (his uncle?).

starstruck

today in the subway, i saw a superstar celebrity! it was Bizzy's dad, from Ready Or Not! imagine my surprise as I woke up from my nap, to look up and see such a famous superstar standing so close to me. unfortunately i was too nervous an awestruck to ask for an autograph..

new interface

In a word, sucks. The new blogger interface has prevented me from posting more often because every time I see it, it is so repulsive that I forget what I wanted to say. What's worse is that it's as slow as molasses.

Remember the old saying, if it ain't broke, don't fix it?

coh

I made a new Lion-Oh, this time on the Pinnacle server. This time he is a Spines/Regen, and man, it looks hilarious when he uses his skills. Big spikes protrude out from his body. It's a frightening sight.. the first time I saw it I jumped out of seat!

mom

Mom is leaving tonight. It's been great the last few days having mom home. We've shared quite a few laughs and enjoyed eachother's company. But I think it's right and meant to be that she is leaving. My brother and dad need her a lot more than I need her. I've grown accustomed to living alone and I enjoy being independant.

funeral

The funeral service for Rev. Yao is on Saturday at 9:30am. I've always wondered, is it wrong to pay respects to a soul-less body? To have the body lay there, all dressed up, and have people come by and say a prayer for it, seems so silly to me. Gross in fact. From dust to dust.

interface

Did I mention how much I dislike the new interface? Boo you, Google! Boo!

Leafs

I am so happy for the Leafs, up 2-0 against the feisty Montreal Canadiens in the NHL playoffs. It has been an exciting series up to this point but as expected Theodore has been a total bust. I think we should be able to take this series in 5 games. Bring on the Flames!

GO LEAFS GO!

today's weather was unbelievable. you couldn't have asked for better weather.. i mean it was sunny, hot and humid. i love humid weather..

i haven't posted any pictures in a while, so here's one, though not really a picture:



This is the game I've been playing, called City of Heroes. That's me in the middle bottom. Lion-0h. I had to make the O and 0 (zero) and add the "h" because the original name(s) were taken already. Sweet though, he really looks like Lion-O, and I get compliments about it all the time. People (I assume they're my age, to be able to remember the Thundercats) walk up to me all the time and emote "Thundercats.. HOOOOO!", and they say how close I got it to the real thing. Hehe.. if only the game allowed the speedo's.

Anyway, I took that screenshot because I was so amused by the 3 crustaceans at city hall. The big one was called "The Lobster", the female was "The Crayfish", and the little one was "The Shrimp". They played as a super group, and they were so funny, just jumping around and role-playing. It was hilarious!

On the bottom left corner you can see Samus, from the Metroid games. She was done very accurately, best I've seen so far of Ms. Aran. The girl reading the newspaper was a dominatrix (tsk tsk, i know), and the girl just below her was Britney. I also saw someone had a Beyonce Knowles, a scantily clad black woman with blonde hair. It was great!

I've tried making other builds but the Lion-0h one turned out the best so far, in terms of the look and accuracy. My character has the Katana ability which matches Lion-O's capabilities with his Sword of Omens. Anyway, yeah, that's been my "after work activities" of late. Pretty sad, but fun.

what the..?

Wow, I stop blogging for a few days and the whole format changes! I'm not sure if I like this.. it looks more like an emailing interface.. and it feels a lot like the gmail interface? Go Pyra Go!

Hmm.. where to start? I few prayer items. My mom is leaving on Wednesday, so pray for her safety on her flight home. Also pray for my grandparents and myself. Last year, they were fairly independant, but things have changed and they no longer cook for themselves. I'll have to take the responsibility of cooking and caring for them.

God sent Reverend Stephen Yao, one of the founding pastors of my old church (Milliken Chinese Community Church) back where he came from on Saturday afternoon. He left our world peacefully at around 3:30pm. Rev. Yao (no relation) was like a father to my dad, and in many ways became a mentor for him during the years we attended M3C. He'd retired a few years ago but he will definitely be missed.

i want one!

I want a kid. After watching the baby dedication service yesterday, and seeing all the children during the children's message, and watching the Friends finale where Monica and Chandler adopted twins.. I know that I've always wanted kids, but particularly this week I really want one.

One time Yee-Lee asked me if I thought it was a good environment for a child to grow up with no mother (we were talking about adoption). Certainly it would not be ideal for a child to grow up without a mother. But there are kids out there who no parents period. Better without a mother than without any *parents* at all, right?

aww..

The Survivor finale show was awesome. Although I truly believe in my heart of hearts that Boston Rob should have swept the final vote, it had to be the best finale ever for this long running series. Boston Rob and Amber got engaged! It makes me wonder how guys manage to propose to their girlfriends without crying.. one of my friends start bawling when he proposed, and I don't see how I wouldn't do the same thing.

Boston Rob deserved the million bucks, but he got it anyway by proposing to Amber (the eventual winner), just before they announced who the winner was. Amber was wearing this I (heart) Rob shirt, and just after she showed the audience, Rob asked Jeff Probst if he could say something, and I knew right there what he was about to do.

It was awesome.

by some miracle, my mp3 player started working again today. i reformatted it to FAT16 and it worked!

Anyway, I listened Undone on the way to work today and one of the songs kinda hit me. The song is called "In The Blink of an Eye". At first I overlooked it as a pop-style song because of its beat but the words are really motivational.

It really uplifted my spirits. Here they are:


You put me here for a reason
You have a mission for me
You knew my name and You called it
Long before I learned to breathe

Sometimes I feel disappointed
By the way I spend my time
How can I further Your kingdom
When I'm so wrapped up in mine

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

And though I'm living a good life
Can my life be something great?
I have to answer the question
Before it's too late

Cause in a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

If I give the very best of me
That becomes my legacy
So tell me what am I waiting for?
What am I waiting for?

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

undone

Seems to me that the band themselves have progressed, musically. Or at the very least, the success they've had has allowed them to get better stuff. The sound is richer. I mean, you can tell the progression even between Almost There and Spoken For, but this CD is the most complete of all. There's just more stuff going on in the background than before.

I notice it more when I listen at work with headphones because the sound is just that much closer, allowing me to notice all the extra percussion and background guitar they play. You can really hear the McPherson's going in some of the songs.. they sound great! Anyway, in general it just sounds like they've spent the last year or so not only touring but learning. Of course I'm no expert but it just seems that way because they've added all sorts of riffs to their music.

In Everything Impossible, they used (i don't know what it's called) but basically when you mute the guitar and still strum it so that you essentially get a (muted, and tuned) beat. A lot of bands do that, and it sounds great -- Where The Streets Have No Name by U2 -- has that and it sounds amazing.

I read somewhere that Bart actually had surgery when he was teenager, in his throat. It's hard to believe he sings so well. God has really blessed this group of guys. I can't wait to see these guys live..

doves

Since in Canada we don't get to see the Dove Awards (airs May 28th on UPN), this won't be a spoiler. MercyMe picked up 4 Doves:

Group of Year
Artist of the Year
Song of the Year (Word of God Speak)
Pop/Contemporary Recorded Song of the Year (Word of God Speak)

Well done guys!

Change-up: Today's blog will contain one-liners only.

William Hung does for chinese people what strippers and porn stars do for women.

7th Heaven might be the most boring show ever. Wholesome = boring?

Shall I skip the Summer Conference and go to one of my very good friend's (classmate) wedding?

Why do I keep waking up at 6am?

Will Far Cry ever end?

Why does Toronto still have a baseball team?

blogging

A: "Hey"
B: "Hi."
A: "How's it going?"
B: "Good. How's work?"
A: "Well, I was talking to my boss and--"
B: "Oh yeah, I read that on your blog."
A: "Okay."

A: "So how are you?"
B: "Did you read my blog?"
A: "I may have.. which post?"
B: "Umm.. the one about my friend."
A: "Hmm.. I don't remember.."
B: "oh okay, well, my friend at school is--"
A: "Oh yeah, I remember now. Yeah, I read that."

B: "Cool. So uh.. I guess I'll see you around."
A: "No, I'm going away remember?"
B: "You are?
A: "Yeah, I said it in my blog."
B: "Oh, I must've skipped that part."

How many of you have experienced parts of this conversation? I know I have. It makes me wonder why I ever bother to blog at all, because blogging is such a conversation killer. If such a thing as an 'avid reader' exists, what could I possibly have to talk about, with that person? If I completely stopped blogging for an entire month, would people start asking me how I was doing, because they couldn't just check my blog to find out?

I guess one thing it might do is help me to separate real friends from posers.

I am dead tired and have been this way all week long. I was only able to sleep until 7am this morning, before I was awoken (is that a word?) by the clanging of dishes in the kitchen.

In most ways having mom and gp's home has been a wonderful blessing. Some nights (before) I would come home and actually "announce" to the empty condo "Honey! I'm home!", just for fun. Now when I do it, mom comes up and gives me a big hug.. It's awesome.. Dinner is being cooked when I get home, so all I have to do is change and get ready for food. In the mornings, when I leave for work I get to say goodbye to someone. Little things like that make quite a difference..

While it's great to be able to depend on and spend time others, one side effect is not being able to spend time alone and depending on God. When things are handed to you on a silver platter, it becomes too easy to forget about God. Not that I've lost my faith or something, what I just mean is not being able to enjoy God's tiny blessings and not being able to focus my attention on Him. And the result is burnout.

One thing that I have really missed in the last while is having quiet time with God, and quiet time for myself. Every day has been hectic, if it's not one thing then it's another, the tasks are endless and don't finish until I hit the sack at midnight. And then it's the whole grind again the next day, and the day after, and the day after. I used to read devotions on the way to work on the subway and back. Now I'm so tired I sleep through the entire trip.

--

Meanwhile, I'm absolutely *stoked* (wow, haven't used that word in a long time) about this new game called City of Heroes. I haven't even started playing yet but I'm really excited about it. It's another MMORPG, but the difference between this one and all the other ones is that you play a superhero, one that you create. That includes his/her name, powers, and costume. In other mmorpg's, you're a dwarf, or an elf, or a knight. There's not a lot of 'roleplaying' to do there.

By roleplaying I don't mean levelling up a character and killing stuff, but moreso acting a part in the grand scheme of things. I want to make a tiny brown fellow and call him Curious George. Or a tiny blue fellow with high heels and a white hat and call her Smurfette. I think it'd be a riot, running around Paragon City as a Smurfette who shoots an assault rifle and can control the elements.

There's a part in "Everything Impossible" by MercyMe, at the 2:25 mark, I absolutely love it, they play an ascending chord scale, and then repeat the same sequence adding distortion on an electric.. it sounds wicked!

august 15, 2004

Friends, mark this date on your calendar, because as you can see, Michael W. Smith, David Crowder Band, and MERCYME are coming to town! Although it is really considered a Michael W. Smith concert (can't blame that.. he's awesome too), and David Crowder (you might remember him from Passion cd's) isn't bad either ---- the biggest highlight for me would be seeing mercyme live, in which I've heard they sound even better.

So... August 15, 2004, Canada's Wonderland.

Tickets on sale on May 5, 2004.

6 days to go!

I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
Your the one that's keeping my heart beating

I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
That's the only way that I'll find healing

Well.. I think I'm sick again.

And I think it's because of the crummy weather we've been having coupled with my lack of sleep lately. I've been trying hard to go back to a regularly sleeping pattern now that I'm no longer obsessed with any particular game. But it hasn't been easy. I've been waking up earlier and earlier each morning, and still fairly late because of the added people in the house the noises they make. Yesterday I didn't get to sleep until 12 because my mom had to use the shower, which is in my room. Today, I can't go to bed because my mom is talking to my dad over Yahoo!. I'm not sure why they insist on using voice instead of just typing.

I'm hoping I'll be all better in the morning though, as I have an important meeting at City Hall.

Btw, City Hall -- not sure if I've mentioned this before, but although it looks really nice from the outside, it's actually a pretty poorly designed building, not to mention pretty crusty inside. I think it's time for a major interior renovation!

bethany dillon

Bethany Dillon is a fairly new up and coming christian singer. You can check out her site here. I came across it through mercyme's forums. You can listen to her entire album on the site, which is a nice little bonus.

Her music is really more pop-style than rock as I'd prefer more but it's still pretty good. There's a lot of acoustic guitar which is always good. And she has a very mature voice for a 15 year old. Reminds me a lot of the first time I heard Complicated by Avril Lavigne and then found out she was only 15. It's like... wow! Pretty good voice for a young'n! Actually as suggested in her bio she does sound a lot like Michelle Branch.

Anyway, give it a go.

end of the line(age)

I uninstalled the game tonight. And I've decided not to buy the game after all. After seeing what it did to me the past 2 weeks I realized it was better that I didn't purchase it. It consumed me, caused me to think about it even when I wasn't playing it. I mean I've been hooked on games before, but for L2, this was only the beginning. After all, it was only the beta -- the real game would have plenty more content, and because it was the beta it was constantly crashing, and crashing is good because it gives you momentary breaks.

far cry

Instead, I bought Far Cry, a critically acclaimed game which has widely been considered the game of the year in the first-person shooter genre. I've been really impressed with it so far. The AI is insanely difficult, I spent about an hour today and couldn't get through first level. They limit your saves much like Freedom Fighter, only with FF I would die because of my own stupidity. In FC, I die because the AI is too smart and I get killed easily when they team up on me.

In terms of graphics there is nothing to compare this game with, because no game out there has a comparable graphics engine. This is the part of my blog when I fret and complain about how the system I bought just a couple of months ago isn't fast enough to run this game at the highest graphical setting. I can't even set it at medium! But simply put, the graphics in this game are breath-taking. I walked out of this sewer area (the tutorial) area onto a tropical beach. The lighting effects are crisp and clear.. like I said, there's no game out right now that I can compare it to. I guess one thing you could compare it with is when Unreal first came out, and how its graphic engine was leaps and bounds ahead of everyone else. This is the same sort of feel you get when you play Far Cry.

undone

My mercyme CD finally arrived in the mail today. I encoded almost immediately and have been listening to it ever since (well, except for when I was playing Far Cry). Hmm.. maybe I should just plug my sound card to my dvdrom so i can just listen to the cd directly. Haha..

Anyway, it's pretty good so far. As usual the lyrics are powerful and the sound is great.

"Unaware"


Forgive me if I stare
But I am taken back
That You would let me here
Regardless of my past

Oh my hands are shaking now
But I catch my breath somehow
I am free at last

Unaware of my fears
Unaware of my shame
Nothing else matters here
But glorifying Your name
Unaware of everything
Knowing You're aware of me

Tell me how I got here
Couldn't make it on my own
Just tell me I can stay
Cause it feels so much like home

And I lose all track of time
When I look into Your eyes
Your love is all I know
I'm aware I'm in a place I couldn't be

If You weren't there to call my name and rescue me
Unaware of my fears
Unaware of my shame
Nothing else matters here
But glorifying Your name
Unaware of my heartbeat
Unaware that I can still breathe
Unaware of everything
Knowing You're aware of me

is it me or is this new hockey series not interesting at all?

with Ottawa, we knew most of the players, and the rivalry was enough to keep us cheering for the team. but with the philly series, i feel nothing. watching the game i felt nothing, and actually ended up watching everything else that was on at night. Alias, Monk. Then City Slickers, which btw, really felt like a major rip-off, until the last 5 minutes.

on saturday night the funniest thing happened. we went to Furama up by Yonge/Steeles for dinner. after the meal, we got fortune cookies, so I would read the fortunes and my mom would translate them to my GPs. my fortune was "Do you believe? Endurance and persistence will be rewarded." Gosh, I hope so.. prayer helps too!

For GG (gongon) it was "A new friend helps you break out of an old routine." so anyway, my mom translates it to just "You will meet a new friend." Then my PP says "new friend?!" and gets this angry, jealous look on her face and shakes her fist, at us. me and my mom looked at eachother and realize she's just kidding and we all started laughing. it was hilarious!

While picking up my mom and GPs the other day I realized that I have been driving way too fast. It's easy to say that I should follow the flow of traffic, but as Christians we shouldn't break the law at our own convenience.

This week was missions week for ACEM. I've often thought about doing a missions trip, moreso like what I'd like to do on one than actually going on one. The last few days I did actually pray to ask God if He wanted me to go, and I feel that He hasn't convicted me to go. That has me somewhat disappointed, but at the same time realizing there's more here at home that He wants me to do.

Today is super cold, and coupled with the rough wind and rain, it's really dreadful out there. I think it's days like these that we should be standing outside staring up at the sky and admiring God's wonderous works. I mean, it's easy to do it on a sunny day. But on a day like today, these are the days that force you to notice His works despite how dreadful it appears (and feels).

My mom and I are trying to quickly put together our passport papers. Mine expires soon and I'll need a new one if we plan on going on a vacation* this summer. It's such a hassle these days to do it. You need two references, and a guarantor. And I could easily have asked some accountant friend, but they haven't known me for 2 years. I've been going to t3c for exactly 2 years now, but do I really know the people for 2 years? It's more like 16-20 months, and some people even less. On top of that, they ask you to mail in things proofs of ID like driver's license. Or they'll ask for "issue date" for health card. Huh?!

*vacation

It's funny to me that I think of vacation as something you get to go on with your family to have some fun, not so much as a time to relax or get away from it all. The other day just driving down Yonge Street I thought about friends of mine going off on vacations to relieve their stress from work or whatever, and I realized that life in general, at least for me, IS a vacation. I get people in our small group complaining that they don't enjoy their work. Heck, I love going to work, the only time I've ever dreaded going to work was if I stayed up too late the night before from gaming. Otherwise, I look forward to it each and every day.

I may not be making very much money, but I enjoy it the work. It's not like I'm living in poverty, and, if I ever became desperate, I know that God would provide. So really the bottom line is enjoying what God's given you. Not just being happy with it but cherishing every moment. There was a cool line on Mysterious Ways last night, when this kid tells Deckland something like:

"You never really know what the great times of your life are, until you suffer through a tough time. So you should enjoy every moment to its fullest."

gmail, cont'd

I can't help but marvel at the speed which gmail operates. You type 'c' and the compose page pops up, 'j' and 'k' navigate through your emails, and the conversation view is unbelievable. The first thing I said when I started using it was "OH MY GAWD". It's just so fast.. It's almost as if you're running it locally, that's how fast it seems. I've never seen anything run so seamlessly on a web browser. As advertised, we get 1 gigabyte of disk space. Another wonder - your mail box won't be deleted after a month of inactivity like Hotmail. Gmail gives you 9 months' absence before they remove your account. 9 months!!

Good times..

Dunc got me onto this 'teamspeak' program which allows us to play Lineage 2 (any game, really) and speak to eachother. This allowed me to meet up with some of his friends to play online together as a group. It was fun. At one point, one of our guys was killed by another player online, so when he came back we went hunting and killed off the guy, and his friend. It was pretty exhilarating. It felt so satisfying afterwards. After that we ran away because they brought their friends. It was 4-on-2, but they were much higher levels than we were.

Later on we went to this waterfall where there were these monsters, they were super hard, we couldn't even put a dent into them. The sad thing is that I played this game for an entire week on a different server so when I joined Dunc's server I had to start over. As a result, I'm at a way lower level than the rest of the group. Well, for these monsters even our best guy could barely scratch them. It's fun because some monsters if you attack them and run away, they chase you forever, or until someone comes to assist.

Not so good times...

Tonight my mom is returning from Vegas along with my grandparents. Mom will stay for a few weeks but GPs will stay for 6 months. This marks the end of my fun for the next 6 months. Not gaming fun, but fun as in getting to sleep in on weekends, going out with friends whenever I want, or having friends over. Well, the latter can probably still happen, but no late nights. GPs, if some of you can recall from my past blogs can sometimes be a thorn in my side. Especially grandma (PuoPuo, or PP). PP is the most stubborn woman on the face of this earth.. probably who ever lived.

The condo will never be "quiet" again. From the time when they wake up at 5am and blast the volume on their TV, til the time they fall asleep at 11pm and I sneak into their room to turn off their TV, it will *always* be noisy.

Important Safety Bulletin

Funny little site someone put up. Good times..

go leafs go!

so.. Ottawa choked again. 4 times we've eliminated these guys. They totally outplayed us, but it wasn't enough to beat Belfour, Cujo, etc.

It was a fun night, tonight the group was Kenric, Andrew, Gladys, and Eric. I was so glad to see Eric again. At first I was a little hesitant, you know, sometimes you don't know what to say, but it was great, after awhile it seemed like it was the same ol' Eric.

The game.. at first with just me, drew and monch, we thought we'd lose this game for sure. Ottawa had seized the momentum, and well, the truth is we didn't know which Belfour would show up tonight. But the great Belfour showed, and although we didn't play a superb game, for the first time all series we weren't completely dominated. And, as I've said all along, Lalime just isn't that great. The more I think about it, he's not even as good as Potvin was. He's a notch below, which puts him in the 'average goalie' category, and not many teams can go very far into the playoffs with an average goalie, even if they're the highest scoring team in the league.

Anyway, I'm just glad we won at this point. Philly.. is another chapter. And now, I bring you the Ottawa song, again. And now you get the option of playing it or not.

Here's a little story
About a hockey team
Who just may win the Stanley Cup
But only in their dreams

The team is from Ottawa
The Senators is their name
They're soon to be inducted in the golfing hall of fame

They think they'll take our Leafers
Now there's a funny joke
Cuz every year at playoff time
The Senators always choke

So three cheers for Ottawa
A real team they are nottawa
They can give all that they've gottawa
But the Stanley Cup will never go to Ottawa

Ottawa has the parliaments
And MPs in the news
And it's kind of like their hockey team
They talk a lot but don't produce

They're not the smartest either
I really have to say
When the capital of our country
Spells Canada with a K

Three cheers for Ottawa
They think they have a shottawa
But they must be smoking pottawa
Cuz the Stanley Cup will never go to Ottawa

You better press your plaid pants
It's that time once again
To hear that familiar Ottawa Senators saying
Tee off is at 10

So get ready for the crying
Take out your handkerchiefs
You're about to get your ass kicked by the Toronto Maple Leafs

Three cheers for Ottawa
A lesson they'll be taughttawa
Hossa and Havalattawa
Will soon be golfing a lottawa

What the hell else rhymes with Ottawa
Not a whole heck of a lottawa

They're the team we already forgottawa
Cuz the Stanley Cup will never go to Ottawa!

milk and cereal

i took it down. didn't want to annoy you guys too much. here's the
link if you want to see it again.

travesty

It is a complete and utter travesty that Lebron James received Rookie of the Year honors over Carmelo Anthony. It simply does not make any sense. So, Lebron had more assists than Anthony. What do assists mean anyway, you can look at it two ways. One way of looking at it is that if you have a lot of assists, you are an unselfish player. However, the other way of looking at it is that you have no one to pass to. Vince Carter was often criticized for opting to pass the ball when he had an open shot; so the question is, why wasn't Lebron taking the shots?

Perhaps because he can't shoot?

Now lets take a look at each players' respective teams.

First, Carmelo played in the Western Conference and his team had a 43-39 record in this (obviously) talented conference. Lebron lead his team to a paltry 35-47 record in a conference most people call the JV (Junior Varsity).

Second, lets look at the teammates of each.

Scoring
Carmelo had first in scoring with 21.0 ppg, with the next best two scorers averaging 14.8 and 14.2 ppg. Lebron was also first with 20.9, but the next two teammates were better than Melo's, averaging 15.5 and 15.3.

Rebounding
Carmelo was the third best rebounder on his team, averaging 6.1 rpg after Marcus Camby (10.1) and Nene (6.5). Here is the most telling story between which rookie is more valuable to the team. Lebron was just 4th in rebounding with 5.9 rpg. Beating him were Boozer (11.4), Ilgauskas (8.1), Mihm (6.4). Lebron benefited from playing with fairly dominating big men, in the JV no less.

Passing
Okay, I'll concede that Lebron is a better passer than Carmelo, and that his ballhandling skills are much better. His assists-to-turnover ratio (1.7) is incredible for a rookie.

Shooting
Carmelo edged Lebron in all shooting percentages.

Steals and Blocking
These are stats that are totally reliant on opponent mistakes. Carmelo had slightly lower stats in these categories, but again, he played in a tougher conference.

Intangibles
Finally there are the intangibles. Many say Lebron faced more pressure because of massive amount of pressure placed on his shoulders. Okay, I'll give him that, but it has nothing to do with this award. Kobe won't get any extra consideration for MVP just because he had to deal with his off-court pressures.

It's game game 7, the clock is winding down and your team is down 1. Who makes the final shot? For Denver, it's Carmelo, hands down. For the Cleveland? It's not Lebron. I saw this happen time and time again while watching Cleveland games. Lebron wasn't the guy taking that last shot.

Understanding that rookie of the year always goes to the player with better stats, I can understand Lebron winning because of those extra 4 assists per game. I'm not really arguing that Carmelo should have won ROY, but rather that the award should have been shared by the two of them. There are just too many factors that outweigh 4 extra passes per game. The fact that Melo is playing in the playoffs right now, while Lebron is playing golf. The fact that Melo doesn't have the kind of players surround Bron, and the fact that he plays far tougher opponents night in and night out. And the fact that Melo is relied upon more when his team needs him most. These factors should be more than enough to make him the co-winner of ROY.

Are you guys sick of the song yet? I'll take it down if you are :) [Ottawans don't count.. although I don't think there are any left who still read this]

Today after lunch somehow someone had the idea that we should all get into one of those fobby picture booths and have a group photo. I'll admit that I have one of such photos. I have no where idea where it is, nor do I care if I ever find it, and the fact that I have one only reminds me of the fun night I spent with Andrew and Lisa at Pacific Mall just before closing time.

I tried Samuel Adams beer today, the commercials say "it's the best tasting beer ever". I thought that meant it would taste good as in sweet, or that it goes down easy. I was wrong. Yuck! Over the last few months I've 'acquired' a taste for beer where sometimes I actually craved for its taste, but I definitely prefer the light colored beers. So, bitter beer and Leafs losing in 2OT pretty much sums up my night.

Lineage 2 is the new game I'm playing. It's in beta, but even that is fun. It's my first experience with a MMORPG. The graphics are amazing in this game, and the style of graphics are really cool. It's actually choppy on my 2.4 ghz processor, which is sad, but not all that unexpected. The game itself I'm still trying to get a feel for. It's highly addictive like all RPGs. Dunc says he plays about an hour per day. I need that kind of discipline, although the reason I'm playing so much right now is just so I can catch up to him and his friends. I know that tomorrow I will probably play from 6pm til 12pm, and I'll probably buy Wendy's so that I don't have to stop halfway to prepare food.

Have not practiced guitar since Lent ended.

So.. just finished Freedom Fighter. I'm really glad actually that I finished it, so that I wouldn't be sitting in front of the tv playing all weekend. And in some ways, I'd say that I hope I never do that again. I thought that after Lent my urge to play games would subside because I did so well not playing them during the Lent. But instead, I played approx 3-4 hours per night, back to my same ol' ways. It hasn't been pretty, I feel almost like it has been an addiction. I really have no feeling of satisfaction of finishing a game like I used to. It was more like going through the motions of finishing it.

While there were few moments of enjoyment, (I really appreciated the team play aspect of the game) I'd say that either this game really sucked, or that I've sort of outgrown the thrill of gaming. And yet, I still felt drawn to playing it. I didn't even practice guitar once all week!

--

And here comes a really long post.

First of all, I'd just like to say that I did not speak even once through the whole small group discussion. Three reasons for this. The first reason, I was dead tired. Second reason, I read that chapter of the book 2 weeks ago and didn't remember anything from it. I know, I should have re-read it, but the truth is I misplaced the book and found it again just before the night began. Final reason was I was thinking about (the following) stuff.

This sort of stems from some topics that my small group discussed tonight. Plus other stuff that I've been recently challenged by and pondering.

From what I can gather, the world (or at least North America) is gradually shifting from what they call "traditional values" to a more liberal ideology. Whenever anyone uses the bible to try to condemn some of the current issues, people turn away almost in disgust because it's too traditional, too old-fashioned.

I cannot blame them really. Jesus came to earth 2000 years ago, and, even if non-believers were to just believe that Jesus did exist, it was still, 2000 years ago. People look at us and think we're conservatives. That's we're following this old religion that is out-dated and closed-minded.

Also, people are splitting spirituality from God, even though spirituality comes from God. This is new age thing, where people have found ways to make themselves feel like they're being spiritual, burning candles or incense, dieting, exercising, listening to certain types of music, etc. But it has nothing to do with God, and deep down all they are filling their empty voids with tools that affect their human emotion.

This void of course, is the whole in our hearts that God was meant to fill. But instead, people are filling this void temporarily with these various practices, along with other things that bring temporary fulfillment. Obsessions, it seems are the best way to describe it. Becoming obsessed with something temporary fills that void.

I wonder if, one day it will come to the point that "Christians" will come full circle and be the ones accused for being too liberal. That God will be so far removed from peoples' every day lives that the sheer mention of Him will be considered "cool"? I suppose this is a possibility, and if so, brings some positivity to all this nonsense.

Someone tonight expressed their disappointment with the world and society, how so-called real Christians have disappeared, they're too passive and not really outspoken. They aren't standing up to their beliefs.

In some ways this expression of thought really annoyed me, because I felt that if they think that we as Christians are not doing enough, they should first look at themselves. I really annoys me when people looking for answers won't look at themselves as the answer. It's like those people who complain about things but refuse to take matters into their own hands. What's that expression, "put up or shut up" ?

Worship
-------

One other topic we discussed tonight was worship, and whether or not some of us were getting anything out of the choir. They were saying basically that they were almost thinking of quitting because they weren't getting the sense that they were truly worshipping God and rather it was becoming more like a job.

And then discussion became broader, like, what is worship really? It's obviously not just singing. Prayer, meditation. That's it? I know, I should have spoken up but again, I cite the above 3 reasons in my defense. Someone mentioned something about sometimes not getting anything out of worship, and so it is not really worship.

When did worship get twisted around like that? Worship is for God. Worship is everything you do that pleases God. Worship comes hand in hand with the concept of pleasing God. Worship pleases God, and God made us so that we could worship Him. Thus, God made us so that we would please Him.

And thus, one shouldn't ask oneself whether or not they got anything out of their worship. The only question we should be asking is "God, did You get anything out of that?". And therefore when people say things like "man, worship really sucked today", or "service was kinda dead", you need to ask yourself, do you think God thought it sucked? Do you think God thought service was "dead"? Or were you just disappointed that you weren't emotionally touched by the music or the message?

If you've skipped over most of this post, at least read this:The purpose of Worship is to please God, not yourself.


Is God disappointed in us?
--------------------------

I believe this question is a recursive question, and not meant to be answered by us, as humans.

What instigates disappointment? Disappointment is when an appointment is broken. It's when you expected one over another, but the another came through. Expectations and disappointments come as a pair. I think I've talked about this before..

Anyway, if God is disappointed in us, that would mean He had certain expectations of us. But God is all-knowing, which means He knows whether or not we are going to actually do what He expects. And that means that He won't expect anything more from us than He knows what we are going to do. And so, how can He ever be disappointed in us, if His expectations of us are those that we are going to do?

Make sense? Let's say I made a ball, and I made it so that it would bounce a certain height. I would expect that the ball would bounce that height. Now I know everything there is to know about this ball, so I know that it will never bounce higher than the height I set it to bounce at, no matter what. I made this ball to bounce that height. I am all-knowing of this ball and I know that this ball will never bounce higher or lower than the height I set it to bounce. So the ball, can never disappoint me.

Something interesting that I read the other day was a false perception, that when God looks at us, He sees all of our sins. The author makes the point that God may see us a sinners, but our sins were washed away have been washed away.



Well, it's 4 in the morning and I have lost my train of thought. Take care everyone!

My search for the best philly cheese steak sandwich is over. I am a big fan of the philly cheese steak, and I believe that I am eating the best philly cheese steak sandwich I have ever tasted. Oops, that statement is outdated now. I believe I have just eaten (and now digesting) the best philly cheese steak sandwich I haev ever had.

The cheese was melted, and there was ample amounts of it. The beef was tender, yet had the chewy texture needed. Perhaps there may have been a bit too much bread, but overall definitely the best one so far. Mushrooms, green peppers, onions, all cooked evenly and were juicy. Sigh, if only I was fatter, then I could eat two of them..

Gosh, i don't even know the name of the place that sells em. It's in a complex next to the 168 at Queen/John.. across from Amato's pizza (which is also *really* good).