See, I'm up again, even though I went to bed only 5 hours ago, and I feel fine!
Anyway I just wanted to point out, because I know a few people who have already bought LOTR DVD..I'm not sure if they are offering the same deal in Ottawa or anywhere else, but here in Toronto KIA is giving away free copies of LOTR DVD, all you have to do is test drive one of their cars! Yeah I know those cars are probably a risk to just drive for even 5 minutes, but a free dvd, that's pretty hard to pass up!
August 31, 2002
If I can't/don't/won't do missions myself, should I pave the way for others to go? Maybe there are different ways of serving, even if totally indirectly.
Funny thing I've noticed about myself when i'm not (1) in school; (2) working. I can sleep 4 hours a night for a whole week feel the same as if I'd slept 12 hours a night for the whole week. I love that! For instance, it's 4am right now, but it feels like it could be 9pm only. Since I don't do anything all day, time no longer matters.
I had dinner with cisco_boy and his new wife today. I really like them as a couple, they complement eachother really well. They're a lot like my mom and dad in the way that they seem like complete opposite people but yet somehow that makes them even more compatible.
T3C is offering beginners guitar course. I wanted to register but I think it's too late now..
Funny thing I've noticed about myself when i'm not (1) in school; (2) working. I can sleep 4 hours a night for a whole week feel the same as if I'd slept 12 hours a night for the whole week. I love that! For instance, it's 4am right now, but it feels like it could be 9pm only. Since I don't do anything all day, time no longer matters.
I had dinner with cisco_boy and his new wife today. I really like them as a couple, they complement eachother really well. They're a lot like my mom and dad in the way that they seem like complete opposite people but yet somehow that makes them even more compatible.
T3C is offering beginners guitar course. I wanted to register but I think it's too late now..
August 22, 2002
I prayed a long prayer last night and felt no different than before. I'm not one to expect instant results, so I will keep trying.
Is "upside" a real word? I hear "downside" a lot. Like so-and-so is in the "downside" of his football career. Not many people use "upside" though. On the upside, he has great future in sports broadcasting. Upside baby.
Would you name your child Duce? Duce Yao. No, I don't think that would work. Torry Yao? Corey Yao?? Donovan Yao? Tiki Yao? How 'bout Peyton? Peyton Yao? I think we have a winner....!
Is "upside" a real word? I hear "downside" a lot. Like so-and-so is in the "downside" of his football career. Not many people use "upside" though. On the upside, he has great future in sports broadcasting. Upside baby.
Would you name your child Duce? Duce Yao. No, I don't think that would work. Torry Yao? Corey Yao?? Donovan Yao? Tiki Yao? How 'bout Peyton? Peyton Yao? I think we have a winner....!
Here's some more insight or am I simply too tired or am I thinking too much? I was talking to a friend about being compelled, or driven by the "will of God". The subject eventually turned to being about where my heart was. Perhaps my heart is in the wrong place, so that is why I've never experienced or fully understand this 'will of God' thing.
To believe that God exists is easy. Believing that God loves us is easy too. Once you believe in A God, then you believe that God created everything. That's the definition of "God". Well obviously God loves us, since He made us. If He didn't, then why would He bother making us? Out of boredom? I think not. The tough part is the giant leap of faith. Believing that God acknowledges me and that I have indeed been saved. Am I really saved? If I believe that Christ died for my sins, then yes, I have been saved, according to John 3:16. But it can't be that easy, can it? Is it wrong to be worried about my own salvation?
I could say that I have been blessed -- my whole family has been blessed. But an outsider could just as easily say "man, that dude is soooo lucky". Kramer would call me "Even Steven". Do I just naturally feel inclined to believe in God because I've been so "lucky"? Am I thankful to God because of my perceived luck?
A new believer feels compelled to worship and obey the Lord, because they've just experienced the change in their lives, from being a non-believer to being a believer. How does that apply to me? I've always worshipped and done my best to obey the Lord. But why do I do it? I accepted Christ years and years ago. If I experienced a change in my life, it was a long time ago and I don't remember what that felt like. So am I a changed man now? If so, how come I still haven't been compelled by His love? When do I get to be driven by His will?
If only it were that easy, to ask God what He wants me to do, and get a straight answer, a booming voice saying: "Brian, here's what I want you to do........." All I want is to follow God's will, I can't think of anything more satisfying than doing exactly what I was set here to do.
As I was reading this over I felt like I stepped into my monitor, or that the words popped out at me like one of those hidden 3D posters! Maybe I should just go to bed. Good night all.
To believe that God exists is easy. Believing that God loves us is easy too. Once you believe in A God, then you believe that God created everything. That's the definition of "God". Well obviously God loves us, since He made us. If He didn't, then why would He bother making us? Out of boredom? I think not. The tough part is the giant leap of faith. Believing that God acknowledges me and that I have indeed been saved. Am I really saved? If I believe that Christ died for my sins, then yes, I have been saved, according to John 3:16. But it can't be that easy, can it? Is it wrong to be worried about my own salvation?
I could say that I have been blessed -- my whole family has been blessed. But an outsider could just as easily say "man, that dude is soooo lucky". Kramer would call me "Even Steven". Do I just naturally feel inclined to believe in God because I've been so "lucky"? Am I thankful to God because of my perceived luck?
A new believer feels compelled to worship and obey the Lord, because they've just experienced the change in their lives, from being a non-believer to being a believer. How does that apply to me? I've always worshipped and done my best to obey the Lord. But why do I do it? I accepted Christ years and years ago. If I experienced a change in my life, it was a long time ago and I don't remember what that felt like. So am I a changed man now? If so, how come I still haven't been compelled by His love? When do I get to be driven by His will?
If only it were that easy, to ask God what He wants me to do, and get a straight answer, a booming voice saying: "Brian, here's what I want you to do........." All I want is to follow God's will, I can't think of anything more satisfying than doing exactly what I was set here to do.
As I was reading this over I felt like I stepped into my monitor, or that the words popped out at me like one of those hidden 3D posters! Maybe I should just go to bed. Good night all.
August 21, 2002
It's been 4 days since I got back from my trip. The thing is, I was so spoiled on that cruise ship, it's pretty been humbling being back, and have to cook my own food, cleanup after myself, etc. I've written up a report on my trip, about the various excursions, some interesting things I saw and experienced. I'm not done it yet though. It's around 6 pages so far. When I get it done I'll upload it somewhere so people can read. I don't think it'd be a very good idea to put it up here, as it would be far too long.
The trip was awesome, and that if I had a choice between living here in Canada and moving out to Europe somewhere, I would choose europe in a heartbeat. It's so much more tranquil there. Like Ottawa, with less cars, less snow, and no humidity in the summer :P
This week has been pretty hectic so far. On Monday I met with a few old classmates discussing our IT consulting company. Man, it's so hard to find that first client.. If only we could find one, then we'd be set. Seriously, the work out there isn't that hard to do, it's just a matter of landing that first job. Even though the chances of us landing anything is minute, we're still going for it anyway, since none of us can find a job. Tuesday I went out for lunch with some old friends from milliken. That was a great time, one guy, moosbacher i hadn't seen in 2 years. He's going into seminary this fall.
Something I think about is how people know they have to go somewhere, like seminary for instance. Are they compelled to go, or do they just feel it's good timing, or have they been praying about it and all signs point to it. And when you get there, are you willing to go? Do you have a passion for it and then you go, or do you go unwillingly despite all the signs? What if you go just because it seems like something God might want? Or how about this, do you go because you don't know what else to do and since it's serving God, you know that at least it won't hurt?
Oh and another thing I was thinking about, is last Sunday, for worship we sang a new song that was taken from TC2002. When the song started playing all the teens started jumping up and down and waving their arms, even though we'd just sung 4 songs just before and they seemed completely listless. What's with that? Were the previous songs so bad? Were the lyrics meaningless to them for the first few songs? Were the words from the TC song that much more meaningful? Or was it just the memory of the fun they had at TC that made them get so excited? If it was the Spirit, which I seriously doubt, why didn't He compel them to jump up and down on the other songs?
The trip was awesome, and that if I had a choice between living here in Canada and moving out to Europe somewhere, I would choose europe in a heartbeat. It's so much more tranquil there. Like Ottawa, with less cars, less snow, and no humidity in the summer :P
This week has been pretty hectic so far. On Monday I met with a few old classmates discussing our IT consulting company. Man, it's so hard to find that first client.. If only we could find one, then we'd be set. Seriously, the work out there isn't that hard to do, it's just a matter of landing that first job. Even though the chances of us landing anything is minute, we're still going for it anyway, since none of us can find a job. Tuesday I went out for lunch with some old friends from milliken. That was a great time, one guy, moosbacher i hadn't seen in 2 years. He's going into seminary this fall.
Something I think about is how people know they have to go somewhere, like seminary for instance. Are they compelled to go, or do they just feel it's good timing, or have they been praying about it and all signs point to it. And when you get there, are you willing to go? Do you have a passion for it and then you go, or do you go unwillingly despite all the signs? What if you go just because it seems like something God might want? Or how about this, do you go because you don't know what else to do and since it's serving God, you know that at least it won't hurt?
Oh and another thing I was thinking about, is last Sunday, for worship we sang a new song that was taken from TC2002. When the song started playing all the teens started jumping up and down and waving their arms, even though we'd just sung 4 songs just before and they seemed completely listless. What's with that? Were the previous songs so bad? Were the lyrics meaningless to them for the first few songs? Were the words from the TC song that much more meaningful? Or was it just the memory of the fun they had at TC that made them get so excited? If it was the Spirit, which I seriously doubt, why didn't He compel them to jump up and down on the other songs?
August 13, 2002
Guess what? I'm on the ship, there are only a couple days left.. this costs $0.50 per minute though.. Having a great time.. Got a pretty good tan..
My mom sent me in this internet thing so I'd talk to this taiwanese girl on the ship. (She's very very pretty..) I never said anything to her though. It's just like me to act that way too, anytime I talk to someone at that level of (prettiness), I can't do it. It's too overwhelming for me. Hahahaha.
My parents have been getting anxious about me being single, throughout this trip they've been talking about it almost on an hourly basis. Any of you guys get this? (ARGH..) I keep telling them that I will wait til God tells me someone is right.. I guess my mom just wants to see me happy, although i AM happy..
Please continue to pray for safety for the remainder of my trip, and also for my finding a job.
My mom sent me in this internet thing so I'd talk to this taiwanese girl on the ship. (She's very very pretty..) I never said anything to her though. It's just like me to act that way too, anytime I talk to someone at that level of (prettiness), I can't do it. It's too overwhelming for me. Hahahaha.
My parents have been getting anxious about me being single, throughout this trip they've been talking about it almost on an hourly basis. Any of you guys get this? (ARGH..) I keep telling them that I will wait til God tells me someone is right.. I guess my mom just wants to see me happy, although i AM happy..
Please continue to pray for safety for the remainder of my trip, and also for my finding a job.
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