January 31, 2005

uber math skillz

Yeah, my math skillz are 1337! Yesterday at Wendy's, the bill came out to $6.89. All I had was a 10 and a bunch of change, but not 89 cents. So I paid $12.14. I did it quick too, no using calculators or nothin'!


Today's ride home was ... interesting. First of all, work was insane today from after lunch til 5pm. I was really tired. When I got to the subway station the train had just pulled in so we ran in. Unfortunately I didn't get a seat. So anyway, at Union more people piled in and we were really really really close. I tried my best to just lean against the wall and sleep.

As luck would have it, when I awoke (to adjust my footing because I almost fell), I found that a really attractive girl was standing right in front of me, face to face almost. She had brown hair, was reading a book and smelled like flowers. I almost blurted "wow" but tactfully changed my words to "wow-oh.. so many people..". She smiled in agreement.

I closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

Then when I woke up, I was standing in front of a really smelly fat guy. So I repositioned myself at the next stop to the middle of car (I was by the door before). When I awoke again later, there was another really attractive girl in front of me. Blonde this time, but she was with her boyfriend, or a close friend. He was tickling her so that affected me because we were so cramped up, there was just no way to sleep with her shaking and giggling. Actually I found it a little annoying.

At around Eglinton, the train pretty much emptied out and I finally got a seat. When I woke up again, it was my stop.

Pretty fun ride :)

January 29, 2005

Hopefully if I get some time this weekend I'll work on my new blog layout.

I love the sensation you get right when you get back in from the cold outdoors, when the blood rushes back in and it feels hot. I have that right now in my hands, they're burning up. This reminds me that I need to buy some gloves. Just for driving really.. I have trouble grasping the wheel when I'm driving because it's so cold.

I finally hit the 5 digit mark on Wednesday, when I drove to Ken's place to practice for small group worship. Yes, I've had my car for 17 months, and I just hit the 10,000 km mark :)

Tonight's small group was good too, last week was great, this week was great. God has been answering prayer and I think we are getting where I wanted to be with our group. I mean we're not there yet, but it's coming along. Ken and I had this goal, a vision of where we wanted to go, and I think by God's grace we will get there. We're way ahead of schedule.

Last week we couldn't even finish half of the chapter, so we assigned only 5 additional pages, and we didn't even get that far. Personally I'm glad, I love the fact that we are talking about things that gets people to think about themselves, to reflect, etc.


I finally cracked open my "Left Behind Worship" cd, it came with my How-To Songbooks from WorshipTogether. Originally I had intended on giving it to someone for Christmas, but decided against it because I had gotten it as a "gift" from WT, and didn't like the idea of re-gifting. So anyway I ended up listening to it by default because I had lent out my "Almost There - MercyMe" and "Arriving - Chris Tomlin" CDs.

The CD is pretty good. It's a compilation of songs, not recent songs but good ones. One that's got me going right now is King of Glory by Third Day. It's one of those 'sing-at-the-top-of-your-lungs' worship songs. I confess that the words aren't particular awe-inspiring, but they are the Truth. And the song sounds great. Anyway, I'll put it up along with the new site when I get a chance to.

January 23, 2005


In Chapter 3 of Seizing Your Divine Moment, McManus talks about a funeral he went to. He marvelled at how even people in the back were deeply touched by that person's life, how the funeral was more of a celebration than a sad time of mourning.

It kinda made me think about how I've lived my life. How I've chosen my friends, who I associated myself with, whether or not I made the right decisions in the past.

This past week I met up with some old classmates and it was a good time. We asked about eachother, how things were, marital status, work experience, etc. Some of those guys were among my closest friends at McMaster.

Yesterday I went to Jacqueline's farewell dinner, and ran into a few people from my past and present -- some friends, some not.

I guess it just made me think about the choices I've made, the paths I could have taken and didn't, or paths I did take but shouldn't have. I think about all the "groups" of friends I have. They seem so segregated. Although now all my friends are closer, in terms that they all know eachother, I just wonder what it would be like to have them all together in one big room, like at a funeral, or a banquet.

Would it be weird? In some sense I have been a different person in each of those groups, as in they were in different stages of my life and my behavior around them was different. Having everyone together from all walks of my life.

January 18, 2005

I've always said that when this path God has placed me on ends -- when I hit the dead end, that I would go and do something just for Him. Not as if He finally deserves it, when has He ever not deserved it. But I guess it's just something I wanted to do. In SYDM, McManus talks about how God's blessing can end up holding us down. I guess in retrospect, me committing to something only after my job was over, was silly. I could have done it at any time.

It's easy to say things like that but to actually do them, that's another story. My contract with the City of Toronto expires in 13 days. From a career standpoint it might actually be good, I no longer feel challenged at my job anymore. From an income standpoint, I've saved so much in the past year, and plus I still have rent income. That's not really an issue for me. Having nothing to do during the day.. that would be really bad. Although it might give me a chance to pull my life back together.

But I'm not really focusing on that. Unemployment, all that.. is scary. But this entire time leading up to the end date hasn't been scary to me. I've always felt secure that God would open another opportunity for me, and I still feel this way. It sounds like a cocky faith, but I'm seriously not worried. God is good, all the time. Even when times are tough, God is good.

People always talk about how they have a heart for some people specifically, and then go to that place and serve.

I guess for me I have always been fascinated about Arab countries and India. Somewhere, where Christianity is forbidden and punishable by death. Somewhere, that I would be risking my life to make a difference in someone's life. Maybe it's the drama (king) in me but I think I need to go to sort of an extreme situation before I felt like was I doing something signficantly helpful for someone.

Maybe that's why God has never placed someone special in my life.. maybe I was never meant to live very long, and thus such things would be a waste of my time. Maybe my purpose in life isn't what I hoped it would be. Some people are able to imagine themselves when they are old. I can't even imagine myself a year from now.

From a career perspective I've done all I can at that job. A highly motivated career oriented person would have left there by now. I stopped learning things months ago, I've cemented (cornered) myself into a corner. I enjoy the work, but sometimes I feel like there has to be more. Yes, lowly motivated me, actually feels like there might be more to work than this.

Look, I'm not giving up. It's just me musing on my ponderings of thoughts and things. Plus I'm really tired.. I was supposed to sleep nearly two hours ago but here I am typing away.

Mostly gibberish..

January 16, 2005

I just watched Meet The Fockers. It was pretty funny.

i got emotional during the wedding scene. dunno why, it was just happy i guess. on the drive home i started thinking about whether it was in His plan that i'd get married some day. it just seems like something that's a long ways off.

i liked dustin hoffman in the movie, he was funny.. the part when he pauses for moment after his feelings had been hurt, that was good. that dude can really act.

and owen wilson playing the pan flute at the wedding.. that was a priceless moment. every time i see owen wilson i just laugh. he's so funny.. his voice, his style of speech.. it's hilarious!

i have to fill an application form for T3C Small Group Leader(ship). It asks me to give a brief testimony. For some reason I can never fully express my testimoney, at least not in the way I want to. I always write about how I grew up in a Christan home, and how I learned about Jesus as a child and accepted him as a child.

But then as I got older became closer to Him, in understanding the meaningfulness of what He did for us, the sacrific He made.

And there's a question "When did you become a Christian?". I don't get that question, or rather, I don't know how to answer it. I could write down the time I accepted Jesus into my heart, it was during Sunday school in grade 2. But what does it mean to be a Christian? Christ-ian, that' Christ Follower. When did I start to devote my life to follow Christ? Probably not until highschool. But how bout this: When did I truly follow my words and go and start living for God? Probably not in highschool. Back then it was all about me, me, me. It wasn't until university when I truly started to FOLLOW God.

So how do I answer this question then: When I started to BELIEVE, or when I started to REACT?

January 12, 2005

The Last Word

Many of you doubted the Raptors' management, when they traded franchise player Vince Carter for a couple of draft picks. There were times immediately after the trade that some people saw Vince scoring and dunking and began to regret this much needed move for the Raptors.

Cutting ties with a former superstar can be difficult. But it had to be done. Think of it as bumping into a former ex-girlfriend or boyfriend. Sure she looks great now, but at the time, it just had to be done. None of your friends liked her and her mom was annoying. She was lazy. She would cry for hours after breaking a nail. No regrets.

What bothers me about Vince is he can't keep his mouth shut. He went on national television and freely admitted what most of us already knew. It's not so much that he didn't play hard, but that he would admit it. As if to get in the last word. And hence this blog entry, my response to this sorry excuse for a professional athlete.

"I'm going to make a lot of people eat their words when it's time," the former Toronto Raptor said after his first practice with the Nets. "Don't be my friend later. If you hate me now, hate me later. I don't mind."

Vince, we all hate you now. Not just the fans but your former teammates, your former employers, and probably most of the players in the league who DO put in 100% every night. Congratulations, you not only made a mistake making the statements you made, you have embararassed half the league, and left feeling of doubt with your new teammates and fans.

The only people who are going to eat their words are the silly Americans who voted you into the All-Star game over the past 2 (and soon to be 3) seasons.

I'm finished with this topic. This is the last Vince Carter post you will see on this site.

January 09, 2005


So the worship leader, Matt, at South Hills Church led the first Sunday but the following Sunday he had gone to the Passion '05 Conference. Man, I'm *so* jealous. But anyway, since Matt was away, this other guy, Alex led worship instead.

And boy was he ever good! Alex is one of their new pastors who is going to be leaving soon to plant another church in Vegas. My parents will be going to that church because it'll be closer to them. My brother says Alex is a big David Crowder guy, sings a lot of his songs. (Whereas Matt is a big-time Chris Tomlin guy.)

We sang Not To Us by Chris Tomlin, You Alone by David Crowder, and a few others which I can no longer recall. It was fantastic! On his band there was an electric guy who was simply amazing. I felt like I was at a concert, he was just playing like a professional, just like you hear the songs on the CD.

Anyway, that got to me so I've been playing guitar feverishly. The latest New Song Cafe on worshiptogether.com shows Chris Tomlin playing with Steven Curtis Chapman, the song We Fall Down. I just love the way Chris plays his guitar, mixing chords and throwing in all sorts of tricks. It's just so cool..

las vegas

The highlight of Las Vegas for me was visiting and spending time with family. And South Hills Church. Aside from that, I can't think of much else. Family is definitely the overall highlight. I see my family once a year now, not counting the individual visits each of them have made to come and visit me. But as a family all together, 2.5 weeks a year is all I have. I truly cherish these moments -- even if we don't do a whole lot special, just the company and us functioning as a unit, that's good enough for me.

As for the church, each time I attended a service, I wished that various people from TO had been able to experience with me. When I look at that church, I see something that all churches that I know must be striving towards. I just hope that one day we can have the similar type of warm community, strong discipleship, prayer, and just a pure enthusiasm of Jesus Christ.

Granted I only get a glimpse of it, and who knows, maybe they're super-charged because of the Christmas season, but it must be (and was for me) a huge blessing to see such a spirit-filled gathering of worshippers week after week.

January 01, 2005

Happy New Year!

I hadn't logged into Blogger so long that I had to guess my password :P

I have been in Las Vegas for the past 2 weeks. I'm here for another 3 days, and then back to Toronto. Back home.

I started missing home after around the first week. I really enjoyed the first week, while my uncle and cousin were here. It was awesome. My younger cousin came but his older brother didn't. But he's a fun guy. He eats so much that you'd expect him to be this big fat kid but he isn't at all.

We've been to tons of buffets. TONS.

And I've been sick. Still sick now but getting better. I got sick because my brother got sick, and I was staying in his room. :(

the real reason I'm blogging

Let's take a moment to remember the hundreds of thousands who have lost their lives to the massive tsunami in East Asia.