July 18, 2004

uninvited
 
It's a silly feeling.  I know, who am I to complain.  Why would I complain?  Who cares right?
 
I went to "Parti-Gras", a street festival held at the Distillery downtown, last night.  After Habitat.  Yeah, I was exhausted.  They had some pretty nice bands there, I really enjoyed the latino stuff, guys with guitars that won't quit.  There was one band called Borg & Vella, they great, both me and Alf agreed they were the best show there. 
 
Anyway, during our conversations, he asked me if I was offended by not being invited to (____ and _____'s) wedding.   I told him I was.  I dunno, I feel somewhat disappointed at not being invited, even though I know I shouldn't. 
 
But still, something inside me gives me this real sense of disappointment, as if, I had absolutely no impact whatsoever to this person.  As if my friendship with her was so insignificant, meant so very little, that I was overlooked, passed on, when it came to inviting me to one of the single most important days of her life.
  
Who am I to complain?  I have been invited to weddings in which when I got the invitation I thought "wow, I barely ever talked to them.. I can't believe they invited me.."  Or even had to do a double-take, like "do I even know these people?".  But still.. it definitely smarts a little when you expect it.
 
Anyways..

back in business
 
Well, the good news is, after discovering my weight had dropped to 130 lbs, I am still 130 lbs.  I can't hardly explain what it was that happened to me, maybe it was anxieties, or maybe it was the games.  But, this massive/sudden loss in weight, but I'm glad for it.  I've lost all the weight I gained in University. 
 
130 lbs is an ideal weight.  People used to look at me (when I was wearing baggy clothing) and guess I was 130.  For a person who doesn't exercise a lot, lounges around and eats tons of junk food, it's a modern day miracle that I'm not fat.  Another great thing, is that my once round belly, or "one-pack" as I used to called it, is gone.  The tire, the rim that would show when i was sitting down, is gone.  It's more like a.. old flattened pillow.  I'm lean.  I'm mean.  I'm a.. err.. lazy bum.
 
I started doing ab workouts, just light ones, which I learned from my old pirated Winsor Pilates videos.  No, they're gone now, but I still remember the exercises :P
 
I like doing them.  When you work your abs, the build up to pain is excruciating, but when you stop, there is this moment in which you feel like you're in heaven, it's such a huge relief.  And every time I'm done, I fall asleep almost immediately after.  It's great.
 
My goal is to get a 6-pack?  Naw.. 2-pack would be good enough for me, or just a flatness there even when I am sitting.

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