revisiting bethany dillon

Having had my fill of my favorite two cd's (Mercyme - Undone, David Crowder Band - Illuminate), and my 3rd favorite (Hillsong United - More Than Life) was all the way downstairs in my car, I decided to check out the top Christian hits off the Billboard site.

I was pleasantly surprised to see Bethany had hit the top 20 again, this time with "All I Need", so I went back to her site. She has all her stuff for free right off the site, just for listening enjoyment. For those of you who have surfed on over to her site -- she is 15 and writes her own stuff. Check out "Beautiful".. i can definitely relate.


Actually what's interesting is that recently I was talking to a friend from Shanghai, and he was telling me how there's almost no artists from China that are successfully writing and singing. All the big stars there are like Britney -- all they do is sing, and none of the famous song writers actually sing their own stuff, either because they can't sing, or they're just not good-looking enough.

I think that's a reflection of the culture, how, parents are just not allowing their kids to explore their own experiences. Why is it that every CBC I know is either in accounting (finance), engineering (tech), or teaching (education)? How many times were you thwarted by your parents when you told them you wanted to be something different, like an artist? It's almost unheard of.

Think about it -- over a billion people over there, and they managed to produce a *single* good basketball player.


So anyone, this is the next CD I'll be buying.

tennis

Roger Federer reminds me of Martina Hingis, with a little bit more "oomph". Great control of the ball, not particularly powerful in any of his strokes or serving. Just great placement. That was enough to beat Roddick to win the trophy. Hingis held up her end of the bargain for many years despite extremely powerful competition (Williams' sisters, Davenport, Seles, Mauresmo, etc.) by just playing the same way Federer is playing. Eventually, power will win out, but right now it's Federer's day to shine.

amish

Yes.. I cannot defend my actions but I watched "Amish in the City", the latest in the string of what appears to be the neverending I-don't-think-people-will-ever-get-sick-of-these reality television shows.

So anyway I watched it, and I don't regret it. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. I mean they actually try to deal with some of the issues of prejudice and stereotyping. Okay, so the premise is 5 amish people get into a house with 5 city folk, and 1 vegan (also a city folk). I'm not sure what the idea is, I mean I don't think they have a voting system or anything.

Anyway, this one part they made all the city folk dress up in amish clothing and go into town. And a few of them came to the realization of what it is like for an amish to go into town and just look at them funny because of they way they are dressed. I thought that was kinda neat. Also, one of the amish girls had never been to the beach, so they went and she was overwhelmed by the sight of it, it was a pretty touching moment.

movie rental

A "Videobee" Video rental store opened up in the mall below me. Apparently they are cheaper than Blockbuster. The Sporkchek down there closed and is turning into a Futureshop. At this rate, I may never have to go outdoors again. If only they built a church down there..

Not a whole lot of substance in my blogging lately, just lots of things I've been doing..

Today, I woke up at 8:30am, a testament to how tired I have been lately. Woke up, walked over to the living room and then remembered I had already finished the chinese kung-fu show. Watched YTV until noon. You know how it is.. X-Men: Evolution, Justice League, etc. Also saw some Populer Mechanics for Kids. I love that show..

Then I played City of Heroes for about an hour, but I nearly dozed off from it. So then I took strawberries leftover from last night's small group and made a milkshake with them.

Then I went to pick up Kevin to go to L'Amoreaux Park, to play tennis with Gladys, Anita, Nancy and Albert. I have not played tennis since the age of 13 or so.. It was fun though. Me and my bro used to hit tennis balls against the big wall at Mitchell Field Community Centre near our house. That's the extent of my tennis skills.. handball with a racket. Haha..

After tennis, everyone went home to shower, and then came over to my place for dinner and a movie. We had pasta, dumplings and ice cream. I think my tummy has shrunken.. I had a plate that was maybe 1/2 of what I used to be able to eat. Anyway, it was good eatin'.

Then we watched The Bourne Identity. I like that movie, my second time through was still almost as good as the first.

dr. strangelove

I have wanted to see this movie for the last 3 years, ever since I spotted it in the top 20 on IMDB.com's top 250 movies list. Even moreso, I once read a Tom Cruise interview and he said that "Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb" was his favorite movie.

So anyway, I bought the movie because I spotted it, of all places, in an Electronic Boutique.

I watched it after work today, right before small group. Probably not the best 'prep' for small group, but anyhow.

Stanley Kubrick's movie is a dark humor film, in black and white. It's set after the WWII and is completely and totally fictional. It's the Nuclear arms race essentially, pitting the US against Communist Russia. The main actor was Peter Sellers, I have no idea who he is, but apparently he's well known. He played 3 different characters in the movie. A very young James Earl Jones is in the movie too.

But I appreciated two other characters the most, neither of whom were played by Sellers. Gen. 'Buck' Turgidson was hilarious, and so was Brig. Gen. Jack D. Ripper. Dr. Strangelove is just plained strange. He made me laugh on a few occasions though.

The storyline is basically this General (Ripper) who goes bezerk and orders a nuclear assault a Russia, and due to some pretty coincidental and just plained silly reasons, they have a seriously difficult time stopping the attack.

I can't rate this movie because it's just so different from anything I've seen before. But it was a good movie.. I can see how it could be someone's favorite movie..

tennis

I went to see the ATP Masters Series, tennis @ York U.  It was pretty good, we got to see Gustavo Kuerten, Lleyton Hewitt and Andy Roddick.  Hewitt lost, unfortunately.  Hewitt is my favorite player on the tour.  I'm gonna edit the post with pics later.  I went with Gladys, Anita, Jacqueline, Kenric, Kevin.

guitar

I've decided to get an electric, after pondering about several different purchases.  I went to MEC to check out the jacket I liked, it's $112, which is just way too much for a spring jacket, even if it's super comfortable, water resistant and folds into a tiny pouch small enough to fit in my bag.  There's also a really nice one, better than that one, that doesn't fold into a pouch, but is $99.  Still too much, in my opinion, considering that my current jacket was no more than 40 bucks.

Electric it is.. Kev says it'll cost me approx. $600 to get a decent guitar and amp.  I think it'll be worth it.

happy

I can't remember being happier than I am right now in a long time.  Not this happy since.. last year?  ... and it'll get better in 6 days, when my brother comes to visit.  6 more days!!

I, Brian

I have read a few Asimov books.  They're good books, I have enjoyed every one of his books that I have read.  I've read I, Robot.  This movie was loosely based on I, Robot, which wasn't a novel but a collection of short stories dealing with complications with the 3 Laws. 

Going into the theatre I expected a Bad Boys with robots -- very low expectations.  I, Robot had basically everything I could have expected from an Asimov movie, plus Will Smith's antics and an annoying female "eye candy" character.  Aside from those two characters though, I loved the movie. 

There was comedy, action, and it was a thinker.  And, if you've never read Asimov, it would've kept you guessing til the end.  The graphics were awesome, very well integrated into the film, and the effects were really cool too, Matrix-esque, with some scenes that I would just exhale "cool".  And yeah, I guess Will Smith was funny as usual which added another dimension to it..

... there was one line in it that I'm still chuckling to myself about. 

Just one thing keeps it from being the movie of the year.  Well, two really -- the girl was pointless, and the movie started out a bit slow.

I give it a 9/10, putting it in 2nd place behind Spiderman 2 for best movie of the year.

cutting edge

Cleaned maybe 5% of my room today, discovered I own this cd.  Boy, it sure brings back old memories.  I originally bought the CD, just for The Happy Song [btw, this song is exhausting to play].  I heard them play it at The Met, and I had to get it.  Haha.. I bought a double cd just for 1 song.  But now looking back, every song on this album is really good. 

cleaning
 
The compose for blogs is annoying.  I want notepad, but they're giving me Word.  Please stop guys, it was better before.

So I did some cleaning.  My ulterior motive for cleaing my room is to find my harmonica.  Although at the same I am hoping I don't find it until the end, because I have a feeling I will stop cleaning when I find it, even though there's still a lot to clean.

weekend

Ray and Sandra's wedding was wonderful.  Thanks to those who provided pictures of it.  I know I've expressed some bitterness towards this whole thing, but I am truly, truly happy for Sandra.  She looks so very happy in those pictures and I am really happy for her.  Actually I'm glad in some ways because I shed a tear while looking through the pictures.  That could have been pretty embarrassing in person.  Haha..

On Saturday Miranda came over and we just sat and chatted, while waiting for Andrew to call me.  Mir's from Ottawa, one of the many dear friends I made there during my internship.  I called up Euhan and he came over, and we made strawberry milkshakes with the leftover strawberries from small group a week ago.  They were sorta rotten (?), but we were able to salvage about 60% of them :)

Then we got the call and went over to Ichiban and Finch/Leslie to meet up with Andrew and Lisa.  To my surprise Andy was there with Euming.  I first got to know Andy at the Genesis Winter Camp up at Blue Mountain, although in truth I met him way before that but he at least remembered me from that time.  Haha.. We sushi.. yum yum!

For some reason sushi no longer tastes all that great to me.  It might be because I've had so much that I can tell what is good and what isn't good sushi, or it might just be that I've had too much and have gotten sick of it?  But sick of sushi, I find that hard to believe.

Anyway, this whole lunch thing was at like 2:45pm, less than an hour before the wedding, so we had to eat really fast.  Then we parted ways, but Andrew/Lisa and I agreed to meet the next morning for Cornerstone. 

That afternoon I went over to Mel and Kevin's new house, for a housewarming party.  It was a good time.  We watched Starsky & Hutch.  Almost all of Mel's family was there.  I met her parents and sister and brother, and cousins from england too.  Well actually the cousins were at the Shakespeare thing too. 

I go where the food is, and yes, there was lots of food.  I actually gained 3 pounds over the entire weekend.  Hehe..

life without God != a good life

Following up on Ricky Williams' retirement, I was reminded more of his situation at the sermon today at Cornerstone.  They talked about the Simple Life, simplifying your life of excessive possessions, about greed and need, etc. 

"The world has enough for everyone's needs but not everyone's greed."

"If I had known what it was like to have it all, I would have settled for less."

As I said before, I hope Ricky finds happiness.

the grass is always greener..

Cornerstone has a lot of really friendly people.  It excites me whenever I go to a church like that, because it is so friendly, you feel so welcome there.  It reminded me of Ottawa, the people there, are just more friendly, more welcoming.  When I first starting going to T3C, I swear it took me about an entire year before I felt truly welcome there.  No complaints though, it's a big church. 

However, OCAC has about 200 people, and I was feeling right at home by the end of the month, and Cornerstone, I could see myself integrating within 2-3 weeks. 

So in essence, it has nothing to do with the size of the church, but the people there.  And I'm responsible because I'm part of the greeters' ministry.  Sigh.

Ricky Williams

I think in general people think that celebrities and professional athletes have got it made.  They are doing *definitely* what they love doing, and they getting paid mind-boggling dollars to do it. 

Ricky Williams is a fine athlete.  Although he struggled early on his career the last couple of years he has been a total workhorse.  I read somewhere that he's had over 775 carries in the past 2 seasons.  Most RBs averaged around 650.  It's no surprise considering Miami's lack of even a middle tier QB.  Jay Fiedler and Chris Weinke (sp?), and this year they were gonna go with A J Feeley.  These guys are all CFL-calibre QBs.

Anyway, his retirement will come as a shock to the sporting world, and especially to the Dolphins.  They have to be kicking themselves and wish RW had announced this earlier so they could have gone out and signed Eddie George.  Now it's too late, who could they get?  There's no one left.  Barry Sanders?  Haha..

This goes to show you that only Jesus can bring true peace and happiness.  You can be doing what you absolutely love doing, and get paid millions of dollars.  You'd think you'd be the happiest guy in the world.  But it'll never be enough until you fill that empty void in your heart, that void that was there since you were born, you were created with that void, so that one day you could accept your Maker back into your heart.  I hope one day Ricky Williams finds *true* happiness.

Fantasy-wise, this downgrades all the Miami players.  With no running game, their lack in QB talent is going to become crystal clear to them.  They upgraded their receivers in getting David Boston, but without a running game to keep defenses honest, they are basically screwed.  They seriously need a *real* QB now..

sound

I am looking at the Klipsch 4.1 Promedia speakers.  They're the best 4.1 speakers on the market from my research, and they pro-sumer quality.  I just don't have the proper desk space to pull off the 5.1 setup.  Unless I place the 5th on top of my monitor..  But what if i get an lcd one day?

Yesterday I hooked up my 2 extra back speakers to make my 4.1 system again.  It's a much different sound but because you're so immersed in the sounds, it makes me kind of drowsy because there are more sounds to process.  Or maybe I'm just tired.. hehe

It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.

Yesterday I went to see Romeo & Juliet with Sylvia, brought to us by Shakespeare Works!, out at the new Home Depot theatre at Ashbridges Bay. 

It's an outdoor theatre, which is kinda neat.  The stage extends out so that you can pretty much see it from any side other than behind it.  The entire backdrop is essentially open, so you just see trees in the back.  The actors come in from all side, there are 4 entrances so they just come running from all directions.  And then there are two more exits behind the stage. 

I'm not "huge fan" of Shakespeare, but I can appreciate it.  I read R&J in grade 9, heard it on tape, and seen the movie with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes about 3-4 times.  Actually it was on TV recently so the story was pretty clear in my mind.  Although I fell asleep on a few occasions, all in all it was pretty good.  They did great job, it was very good flow from scene to scene.

jacket search

Went to MEC today, saw a really great jacket that I wanted badly if not for the price of it.  It met only 1 of my 4 criteria though.  I am looking for:

1. Waterproof, or at least water resistant.
2. Inexpensive.
3. Folds into a small bag.
4. Has a hood that can either be removed or tucked away.

The one I saw satisfied #1.  Another jacket I found at the store across the street from MEC was a North Face(?) jacket, it satisfied all but #4.  My thinking is that #4 might not be as important if I have an umbrella, but I lost my nice umbrella that fit perfectly in my bag, so now I need a jacket with a hood.

The MEC jacket was so nice though, soooooo nice.

one more thing

..Is I might need a new soundcard and, possibly a new speakers set for my PC.  I want to make the most of Doom 3, which supports 6 channels.  (I assume that means 6.1, and I only have 4.1).  Although, I'm not sure where I'd place the aux. channels.  I'll have to build stands for them.. or hang them from the ceiling?  Hmm.. maybe I should re-think this.

material things

One of my friends at work got a new camera, Canon, G5 I think.  It's pretty sweet.  I could see myself buying it, maybe in the distant future.  Looking at it and comparing it to the d70 or Rebel, it's just more bang for your buck.  Plus I'd never be able to justify such a large purchase -- what do I use camera's for anyway, other than capture special moments in my life, or interesting things I see?  I don't print any of it, it's all web-posted.  I don't need a camera so good, and for a small fortune, the money could be better used elsewhere. 

The G5 is probably something I might get in December sometime.

The thing I've wanted for over a year now is an electric guitar.  Now that I'm back to regular guitar practising again, I really feel like I could progress further with an electric.  Some of the solo's just don't sound right with a guitar (not that I can actually do them properly). 

And finally, a jacket.  The jacket I use right now is the same jacket I wore in winter.  I need a spring jacket, something that is water-resistant, and I'd prefer something that can fold up into a pouch small enough to fit into my man-bag. 

deeper

Ha ha!  Wo3 si4 tai4 gao1 xing4 le5!  I've found the proper chords to one of my all-time favorite songs "Deeper" by Delirious.  My fingers hurt so bad!  Praise God!

no games

I haven't played games since Friday night (Saturday morning).  This is the longest I've gone without games since Lent.  But I'm not trying to "better myself" by playing less games, etc.  I've just lost the urge to level up my character.  Doom 3 will be out on August 3rd, and I will definitely *definitely* be playing that one.

But no games means great guitar practice, which yes, I've started again, mostly in part to the DCB cd.  The other thing which I also noticed during Lent, was that I'm constantly tired without games.  I'm tired now, I could go to bed right now, at 10 pm, and fall asleep easily.

I figured out the neato alternate bass part for "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever".  I'm sure it's for an .  I started to think about this song after being reminded that we're getting close to the blackout (my best birthday ever), and the time when I was walking up Yonge street singing this song even though my feet were killing me and I was actually feeling really sorry for myself.

Also if you haven't noticed, I've been blogging a lot more.

freedom

I haven't felt the ill-effects of being here alone again, yet.  I figured that sooner or later I'd start feeling lonely here, but I haven't at all, I've been loving every moment of it.  There's nothing quite like a hard days' work and coming home to an empty, dead silent apartment.  I mean total silence.  It's awesome..

work

I haven't heard anything about my job post yet, still waiting for it.  But today I had a talk with my supervisor, and he basically told me I had nothing to worry about for at least one year. 

Today I took some initiative (initiative?  what's that?) and asked if I could be more involved with the analysis/requirements stuff.  And then somehow I volunteered myself to do more training.  Hundreds upon hundreds of people need training and I volunteered.  Mr. "barely says anything, even at small group" has volunteered to teach 4 hundred of people.  Umm.. yeah, reeeeal smart, Bri.

dream

Last night I had a dream.  I dreamed that a whole bunch of us -- and by us i can't say i remember who else was there -- were singing together.  We were all standing in a circle.  There were many.. like maybe a hundred or a thousand.  It wasn't one circle, I mean it was a large crowd and just the middle was hollowed out.  I was in front so I couldn't tell how many people there were behind us.

We started singing a song, Rain Down by DCB, and I fell to the ground as if either struck down by the Spirit, or just felt ashamed before the Lord.  I started to weep, and I couldn't get back up, and people around me were just watching it happen.  No one tried to help me up again.

That's all I can remember from the dream.

Holy Holy is the Lord
Holy Holy is the Lord

bourne free
 
I just watched The Bourne Identity, borrowed from a friend at work.  It was awesome..  I can't believe I didn't see it til now.  Once again my theory is proven, Matt Damon is by far the better of two 'buds' (him and Affleck).  He just picks the right movies to star in, whereas Affleck just can't seem to get it right.
 
Anyway, very good movie, and the sequel comes out this weekend!
 
all i can say
 
This is the second album I purchased by David Crowder Band.  It's an older of his cd's and it is mostly acoustic stuff compared to his very pop-sounding/electronic/rock cd "Illuminate".  I can actually play along with most of the songs from it.  Aside from good sounding music and creativity, I think what draws people to this band is his voice, it's very unique. 
 
Also it's kinda rock but also many of the songs can be used for P&W. 
 
I really like the title song.  It's kind of depressing and yet not, but it's got nice lyrics:

Lord I'm tired, so tired from walking
And Lord I'm so alone
And Lord the dark, is creaping in creeping up
To swallow me
I think I'll stop, rest here awhile

And didn't You see me cry'n
And didn't You hear me, call Your name
Wasn't it You I gave my heart to
I wish You'd remember where You sat it down

This is all I can say right now
And this is all that I can give
Yea, that's my everything

I didn't notice You were standing here
I didn't know that, that was You holding me
I didn't notice You were, cry'n too
I didn't know that, that was You washing my feet

This is all I can say right now (I know it's not much)
And this is all that I can give
Yea, that's my everything

uninvited
 
It's a silly feeling.  I know, who am I to complain.  Why would I complain?  Who cares right?
 
I went to "Parti-Gras", a street festival held at the Distillery downtown, last night.  After Habitat.  Yeah, I was exhausted.  They had some pretty nice bands there, I really enjoyed the latino stuff, guys with guitars that won't quit.  There was one band called Borg & Vella, they great, both me and Alf agreed they were the best show there. 
 
Anyway, during our conversations, he asked me if I was offended by not being invited to (____ and _____'s) wedding.   I told him I was.  I dunno, I feel somewhat disappointed at not being invited, even though I know I shouldn't. 
 
But still, something inside me gives me this real sense of disappointment, as if, I had absolutely no impact whatsoever to this person.  As if my friendship with her was so insignificant, meant so very little, that I was overlooked, passed on, when it came to inviting me to one of the single most important days of her life.
  
Who am I to complain?  I have been invited to weddings in which when I got the invitation I thought "wow, I barely ever talked to them.. I can't believe they invited me.."  Or even had to do a double-take, like "do I even know these people?".  But still.. it definitely smarts a little when you expect it.
 
Anyways..

back in business
 
Well, the good news is, after discovering my weight had dropped to 130 lbs, I am still 130 lbs.  I can't hardly explain what it was that happened to me, maybe it was anxieties, or maybe it was the games.  But, this massive/sudden loss in weight, but I'm glad for it.  I've lost all the weight I gained in University. 
 
130 lbs is an ideal weight.  People used to look at me (when I was wearing baggy clothing) and guess I was 130.  For a person who doesn't exercise a lot, lounges around and eats tons of junk food, it's a modern day miracle that I'm not fat.  Another great thing, is that my once round belly, or "one-pack" as I used to called it, is gone.  The tire, the rim that would show when i was sitting down, is gone.  It's more like a.. old flattened pillow.  I'm lean.  I'm mean.  I'm a.. err.. lazy bum.
 
I started doing ab workouts, just light ones, which I learned from my old pirated Winsor Pilates videos.  No, they're gone now, but I still remember the exercises :P
 
I like doing them.  When you work your abs, the build up to pain is excruciating, but when you stop, there is this moment in which you feel like you're in heaven, it's such a huge relief.  And every time I'm done, I fall asleep almost immediately after.  It's great.
 
My goal is to get a 6-pack?  Naw.. 2-pack would be good enough for me, or just a flatness there even when I am sitting.

habitat for humanity
 
Today I went with Anita to volunteer for Habitat for Humanity.  Even though I've done tons of projects with my dad over the past years I must admit I felt pretty overwhelmed with what they were doing.  I've never built a house from bottom up.  The stuff I've done is renovations, not creations.  I definitely never dealt with floor joists.  I've done flooring, but that was basement so there was just cement underneath.
 
Anyway, I should stop making excuses because the average volunteer had no experience either.
 
It was really hot, and I am hopelessly out of shape.  Gosh, I love the font in this Compose mode.. So anyway, I think I got sunburnt on the back of my neck.  I spent a lot of time standing in the sun, not doing much.  No, I don't believe in sunscreen lotion.
 
Lots of times I felt pretty useless out there, it seemed like there was more people than they needed.  There was this one funny moment though, that I imagined my honeymoon would be like this, where me and my wife would travel to a third-world country, and build homes/huts voluntarily.  That would be our honeymoon.  That would be so great.. No, seriously!

I started watching this chinese show.  This guy at work lended me 45 cd's worth of some story.  I've watched two so far.  I really don't quite understand what's going on.  First, there was this guy and his wife, their caravan was attacked and somehow she died and he lived..  she was carrying a baby.  Anyway, he kills himself but the kid is left with the hoodlums.
 
Then they show 30 years later and this kid is grown up and is a kung-fu fighting bad guy.
 
Then they show these 3 guys doing some kind of business, their kung-fu is great too, they were able to blow up a ship!
 
Then this guy who can't fight at all goes on this adventure to save some little girl from some bad guys, meets a kung-fu fighting girl who happens to be the little girl's sister?  Anyway something about how she covers her face, and the first man to see her has to marry her?  And this non-fighting guy has to marry her now? 
 
Yea.. so that's what I did tonight, aside from cleaning more.
 
Oh yeah, and in the opening credits, one of the peoples or producers or whatever, has the same last name as me.  I know that in our family there is a movie star, but as far as I know, she's already old and retired, so it's not her.  Could be another one, or just someone totally unrelated like Yao Ming? 
 
Oh well.  Bedtime.

church

I had a discussion with Kev last night about the merits of attending a church that really challenges you as opposed to going to a church that gives you the chance to challenge others. Actually it wasn't much of a discussion, it lasted maybe 10 minutes tops.

The trade-off between getting the most out of church, or church getting the most out of you. It's the very reason that I originally had no intention of calling this nomadic church going a "church-hopping" thing but more of a "visitation". However, the contrast being so drastic as it were, got me thinking about perhaps the possibility of moving on.

Honestly I haven't given it that much thought at all. Part of me fears moving on. The fact that my family isn't here, and my only friends are at my church, outside of work friends. Not that work friends aren't as important, in fact they really are, I'm quite close to a good number of them. I guess the attachment is there, and leaving that would be scary. Part of me also feels like I have more to offer and moving on is like a cop-out.

On the other hand if try to think back of the last time I felt really challenged by a sermon or sunday school discussion, I would have to think back pretty far. I haven't gotten anything out of sunday school since two summers ago when Daniel taught us about spiritual warfare. And as far as sermons go, outside of the quarterly "fire and brimstone" Harding messages, sermons have been fairly routine for the past year.

Kev made a point that some people go on a never ending search to be challenged, and never get the fact that it's time to start giving back. The grass is always greener on the other side, is what he pointed out. In fact there are people who don't even realize it, they just go on and on, in an endless search for the ultimate church.

I dunno, it's something to think about, to pray about. This week I'll be going to Oasis, where Kev is going.

Next week possibly my old church. I also want to hear someone speak in tongue. And attend a black church.

Today marks the end of training users, at least for a couple of weeks. Training has been somewhat of a blessing and also just very tiresome. On the one hand it gives me a lot of practice in speaking in front of an audience. One thing I've learned about myself is that I do far better going 1-on-1 with users to explain things than I do to a larger crowd of people. Monday and Tuesday were spent taking turns with my co-worker and a summer student, teaching various parts of the system.

As each day passed I was given more responsibility, and then today she handed over the reins to me and I taught the entire day. I sort of did enjoy it, even though history would show that I hate teaching. The thing is though, when you really know your stuff, you can be completely fearless out there. When someone asks you a mind-boggling question, that's when it's time to panic.

It's Wednesday but honestly it feels like a Friday, I'm that tired. My voice is a little craggly from all the speaking, explanations, answering. I'm currently in the midst of cleaning up the place so that it can be at least somewhat presentable for small group on Friday.

I've been missing small group on and off, firstly from my own inner struggles and depression, and then from the busyness of keeping my grandparents happy, and then just having better things to do. (I don't mean to say that small group isn't important, but sometimes opportunities arise for me to visit or spent time with friends that I haven't spent time with in a long time). I suppose that's a poor excuse, but I'm going with it :)

king arthur

Even if this movie was made before The Patriot, before LOTR, before Braveheart -- I'd still think it was pretty bad. It's tough for movies nowadays to follow up epics like those, because they've been done so well and you can't really improve upon those battle scenes.

This movie had its moments. The ice battle was fantastic, I mean after that battle, I was thinking 'hey, maybe the critics were wrong'. But then it just dragged on and on.

The acting was the worst, they may as well have had David Duchovny doing it. This Clive Owens guy just cannot act. If you're gonna have a main guy with tons of charisma, get a guy who can act, I mean what the heck? Mulder meets Braveheart? Cripes!

Story-wise, it was satisfactory, a very different look at what I'm used to seeing for King Arthur stories. For that I give them thumbs up for originality. I never ever imagine Merlin to be a decreptid skinny dude with tatoos. Isn't he supposed to be a wizard of some sort?

Anyway, overall I'd say the movie is 5.5/10.

ETCBC

Today I went to East Toronto Chinese Baptist Church. What I liked about this church is that there seemed like a genuine interest in coming to worship God, and not just something to do on a Sunday. What I mean is it didn't feel like people were just going through this weekly routine. Of course, it's hard to gauge this when you don't know the people.

For singing, they sang 3 songs and they didn't milk the choruses over and over annoyingly like some people do at my church. For sermon notes check with my other site.

After sermon people rushed off to Sunday School. I've always felt like (at least for me), during sunday school I'd keep watching the clock and just hope it would end soon. I dunno if that's just my sinful nature or total disinterest in the topics they are discussing, or my impatience or hunger. At any rate I was starving but felt like the class ended too quickly. We watched a video of Harvey Kerry, a black preacher speaking at Willowcreek. He was very good, very powerful and challenging. Funny too. He spoke about the Word, and how we should all get back to reading the Bible.

Seems like God has been calling me out lately to read the bible more. Lon made a great point about how a lot of us read so many books and then go and tell people about what we read, rather than going straight to the source and sharing His word. What ends up happening is we end up delivering a very dilluted message.

It's like if you're trying to learn about a war, you could read thousands of books and watch movies about it, but if you spent an hour with a veteran, you would get so much more out of it. Similarly, reading books about Jesus pales in comparison to reading about Jesus from the source, the Bible.

Anyway I just thought that was great and I re-committed myself to being a regular scripture reader. No more excuses, now that my grandparents are gone I can no longer complain of not having any quiet time to myself.


Something I noticed about ETCBC, is that the Sunday school teachers seem rather pleased with themselves when class ends later than they should have. I think that's great.

5:30 am

I woke up. I was actually up by 5, you can thank my internal clock for that one. In retrospect, I should have just gotten up then. Keep in mind, it's an 8:30 am flight.

5:57 am

Grandparents woke up, started having breakfast. I went over to make sure they had everything ready. Green light!

6:20 am

Told the grandparents it was time to go. I figured it would take 15 minutes to drive there at most, thus we'd get there 2 hours early. They were all ready to go, just zipping up the bags.

6:30 am

Still not out the door yet. Grampa gets really nervous or anxious when he travels, so at this point he thought he had forgotten something, and was sitting trying to remember what it was. I went up and down the checklist. Do you have your medicine? Passport? Money? Clothes? Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Okay, let's go. Okay, keep thinking.

7:00 am

We finally left the place. I went for the Yonge Street 401 West exist. Closed. Drove back and hit the Bayview exit. Closed. Leslie? Closed. Okay, this is bad, it's 7:30. So I took 401 East to the 404, and slipped back around and back on to the 401 West, and away we go. Speed limits? Screw them.. Got to the airport at 7:45 am.

7:50 am

Dropped off the grandparents with one bag and told them to just go indoors. Drove around, found a parking spot, grabbed the bigger luggage and 2 chinese paintings and headed back to the terminal. When I got inside, I couldn't find them, I ran around for about 5 minutes then realized they were still outside. Finally got them to the Special Assistance area, sat them down and lined up.

8:00 am

"Sorry sir, boarding closes 40 minutes before the take-off."

8:30 am

Successfully booked a new flight at the cost of $100/person, 12:10pm. There's no way to be late for this one I figure, we've got 3+ hours to work with, and we're already at the airport. Right?

9:30 am

Air Canada finally lets us check-in. I book 2 wheelchairs so GPs won't have to run from gate to gate. 2 AC flight assistants push them while I take the bags to customs.

9:45 am

U.S. Customs tells me we need to declare with Canadian Customs first. That's downstairs. No problem, lots of time left. One assistant leaves, leaving the one guy pushing two wheelchairs while I push the bags. We head downstairs to meet with Canadian Customs. He starts filling out a form. He acts as though he's never done it before, and consults with another officer. The two of them look at the form, it's #8665 I think. The US Customs guy told me I needed a different form. Oh well.

10:05 am

We're about to wrap up the form. At one point the guy thought he'd have to take out the money and count it all to make sure, including what denominations they were. Yikes, but the other officer gives him this funny look and he says to forget it. Meanwhile, while they're doing all this, I turn to Grampa to point out for like the 90th time, this is what happens when you bring so much money. He looks at me and goes "I don't get it.. it's nothing."

10:20 am

We finally finish this form, which btw he doesn't even give to me. How is U.S. Customs going to know I've been through Canadian Customs if I have nothing to show them? Oh well. By now the AC assistant has left to tend other people, and says he'll be back later. I give the form for my Grampa to fill out.

At this point I hear sobbing and some woman in the back saying "..but sir, I didn't do anything wrong! Please..!" -- Yikes! What's going on back there?!

10:30 am

Finished signing the form, the work is done, need to get back to U.S. Customs now, even though I have no proof that I've been through Canadian Customs. We're now waiting for the AC assistant to come back to help push the wheelchairs.

10:50 am

He finally arrives, along with the other person who was helping from the start. We push our way back upstairs and then to the US Customs. That's odd, where's my Customs Card? I think the U.S. Customs inspector guy had it. They run off to look for it. Nope, can't find it. Oh well.

Finally made my way to the back inspector again, and yes, he had it.

11:00 am

Cutting it close again? No, it's finally time. Hugs all around. Exhausted, dehydrated, and STARVING, I head back to the car and drive home. On the way home, I got lost. As most of you know, I'm terrible with my directions. I ended up basically circling around North York twice before I got home at noon. LOL..

Praise God for bringing me home safe and sound, and thank you Lord for this awesomely frustrating adventure!

I find that my appetite comes and goes. Today, it came, but I couldn't eat due to some Imodium problems. When I came home I had toast, just plain ol' bread. 4 slices, and some jam. I don't think plain bread has ever tasted so good to me..

My desk is too high. My desk chair has arms, and i've lower them as much as possible so that I can hike up the chair as high as possible (arms block it from going any higher). Due to the height of my desk, often times I find that my elbows start to hurt because they're being raised too high while I do things on the computer.

Packed weekend coming up. Tonight, small group. Plus I need to take the GPs out for dinner. This is their last night here, at least until they come back in September. I often joke about how I'd be so glad they're leaving. I guess what I really mean is I'd be glad when there is no one else living here but me. It's nothing personal against them, I just prefer it this way. I really do love them.

As a child we never really got close, so my relationship with them is pretty casual, in total I have lived with them a long time, but I honestly don't know them that well. They are closed people, very private. Until this year I don't think I'd ever had a conversation with either of them. Recently I tried to inquire about where my grandfather went to school and what he studied, he couldn't remember. I asked them about how they met, where they met etc. Couldn't remember. They couldn't remember anything. Oh well.

Oh, so Saturday is their flight, 8:30am, so I need to be up pretty early. They're slow movers so we'd have to leave no later than 6:30, which means I'll have to wake up at like 5:30. Which means I can't stay late for whatever they do after small group on Friday. Then after the flight, I suppose I'll come home and start cleaning the place up. My room looks like someone tar and feathered my room with my clothes. It is ALL OVER THE PLACE.

Saturday afternoon and evening will be at my co-worker's place. She has a pool and a deck, and she drinks. I bet if she drank a Guinness she'd complain it went down too smooth. Yes, she can hold her alcohol :) I'm really looking forward to this thing. Lots of 'gourmet' drinks, lots of food, bbq!. We're expecting about 20 people!

Then Sunday off to ETCBC. 10:15 service, but I'll try to make the 9:15 prayer meeting. I think next week I'll go to either Cornerstone or Oasis or Milliken. If Andrew's Harbs are playing my old church then I'll probably go to my old church Milliken, have some lunch with them and then go watch get their arses handed back to them. Should be fun.. just like the good ol' days :)

In between I think there's choir practice at T3C.

weight

my weight has been fluctuating like mad. in the last 3 days I have regained weight at a rate of almost 1 pound per day. maybe there's something wrong with my scale?

football

to my surprise while reading rsff again (yes, i just can't stay away!), i found greg kellogg was posting there still. he doesn't do it as often as before, but he's still there. I was quite surprised..

also loaded up AIM and chatted with a ffl friend (whom i've never met.. it's funny he came to Toronto last year at the worst possible time, the blackout.. haha), invited him to gmail along with his friend and his girlfriend. but anyway, it was nice chatting with him. i hadn't talked with him since basically last season. if only there were people here as knowledgeable about ff as there are in the US.

one thing i can't stand are people who talk about fantasy football like they actually know what they're talking about, but every word that comes out of their mouth is just regurgitated information they read somewhere. that's kind of annoying.

actually, i just find that annoying period, regardless of the subject.

hillsong united

i finally watched the dvd that came with my 'more to life' cd. it was great.. found myself jumping up and down (moshing) all by myself in the my living room. how silly is that..

happy birthday kenric!

Okay.. so the post is technically late, but.. close enough right?

I stayed late after work today.. an entire half hour! Unbelievable. I had some work I needed finished. After work I headed home and then went over to Eric's to play some more XBOX. We had pizza for dinner. Kevin was there too. Good times.. The more I play the more I start to want an XBOX..

Afterwards we headed down to the Milestones to meet up with Ben and Kenric to have some drinks. Jimmy and Tracy came too, and Gaston too.

Then I came home and watched The Amazing Race! It's 1am.. better go to sleep!

Look at these melons.. haha.. not a lot of meat! 

... and the season begins!

I've gone what feels like 3-4 years without following football. Actually, it's only been the entire offseason. Every year I have prepared carefully following each and every transaction, catching the opinions of each move for the player, coaches, and media. It's important to get everyone's side of the story to understand the impact a player will have on a new team, and on the old team.

Anyway, I get these email updates and I'd been saving them for 'later'. Today I read everything that happened between May 1st and June 19th. Vinny in Dallas, reuniting with Parcells? Dillon in New England I did hear about before.. that's also crazy though. New England becomes an all-round good team. Dillon is so lucky..

So yeah, talk about a crash course in football. I've still got another 18 emails left to catch up to date. I also went back to take a look at rsff (rec.sport.fantasy.football). A few old timers left, like pnishthm, Beal, bizmach. Oh yeah and the magnificent bastard, but to be honest, mostly just a bunch of rowdy kids, and spam. Gone are the days when that newsgroup was a useful source of ff information. Oh well..

Football, baby!

clear

It all became clear to me tonight, what had happened, the truth of the matter. I'm glad, slightly disappointed but overall relieved. I can finally close the door on this. It's over... it's over.

Woohoo!

you know you're getting old when... part 2

...you wake up sore after a day of playing frisbee the day before.

weight

I have lost 15 lbs in the last month. I couldn't eat for several days after the summer conference, but that was only a few days, and I didn't lose weight as a result of that. In fact, the last couple of weeks I've actually eaten more, a lot more. I haven't even been watching my diet, practically gorging in foods. And yet the net result is returning to my highschool weight, before my frosh 15.

It's crazy, being at this weight and looking down and seeing the belly that I have. Where did it all go?!

etcbc

This week will be ETCBC week. The last time I was at East Toronto Chinese Baptist Church was as a groomsman for Lon's wedding. The last time I went there for service was about 3 years ago. No one came to talk to me, it was weird, very reminiscent of my first few months at T3C. The only difference is I knew people at ET.

The great thing is I'll get to sleep in.

sleep

Speaking of sleep, I slept so well last night. I haven't slept like that in months.

wimbledon

Hands down my favorite tennis tournament. And looks like there's hope again for womens' tennis. 17-year-old Maria Sharapova beats Mr Serena Williams. Hopefully this is the beginning of a new era for womens' tennis, I'm tired of watching that *man* winning all those womens' tournaments.

I also like the fact that these are russian girls winning these things. Myskina winning at Roland Garros, and now this. It's great for womens' tennis in general, because whenever Americans lose, it means more talent is on the way, and it's also great for the smaller venues because the higher ranking players will show more interest in them, in the hopes of getting enough points to maintain their ranking on the tour.

and i thought i had long posts..

I started reading Mark Cuban's blog. For those of you who don't know, he is the flambuoyant (and extremely wealthy) owner of the Dallas Mavericks. He's an interesting guy, I enjoy his blogging. The guy bleeds basketball, I mean he is completely consumed with it, and his team. And he loves his team. You look at the way the Raptors or Leafs are run, it's by an organization, not particularly one person but a group. MLSE. They'll spend enough to get the Leafs into the playoffs, but not enough to get us a championship. Mark Cuban will spend until he gets the championship, but he doesn't just buy his players, he selects them intelligently, and he does care about loyalty and chemistry.

I think that's great.

wiped out

I'm wiped out today. After two fun filled days I am toast. Beat, broken-down, burned out, consumed, dog-tired, done in, drained, fatigued, finished, overtaxed, petered out, pooped, sleepy, spent.

Thursday's Halo-fest from 1:30pm-2:30am, and then yesterday's Dumpling-fest at Andrew's, followed by Spiderman 2. I'm too tuckered out to review the movie. I still say Dunst makes a horrible MJ. Nothing against Dunst tho. I liked the movie though.. Dumplingfest was great.

I crashed at about 4pm today, I was playing COH, and just about fell onto my keyboard so I took a nap. I woke up about 15 minutes ago, still feeling very tired. I'm in that dream state you often fall into when you're really tired. I was supposed to take the GPs out for dinner today but just way way too tired.

Argued for about 5 minutes with my grandmother because whenever she travels anywhere she likes to take everything with her. Like *everything*, as if she's moving. She'll literally take a massive suitcase, even though she wears the same clothing EVERY SINGLE DAY. She won't even open that suitcase up for the entire trip! And then she'll just bring it back again! That bag ways a ton, it won't even get past customs, and then I'll have to carry it back home again.

She tried to do the same thing when she came here from Vegas this spring, somehow my mom bribed her into not bringing it. Basically it was like, one day she asked if they could go out to eat somewhere, and she told her, only if you don't bring that massive bag with you (yeah, she's got one over there too), and she relented.

Grandma really *irks* me sometimes.. who am I kidding, _all_ the time.

you know you're getting old when: part 1

You start using the expression: "I'm trying to cut down on..."

happy canada day!

In Toronto, generally speaking, Canada Day means a day off. No one really celebrates Canada Day in Toronto. Today, I went to bed at 4am, and slept in all the way til 9:30am. That was as late as I possibly could sleep in, since my grandfather barged into my room right then and woke me up, to remind me was I late for work.

I spent the next 3 hours in Paragon City, levelled up my Lion-0h up to level 20. Then I chatted briefly with hankishin, took a shower and met up with him for lunch. PHO. 101. The place at Yonge/Steeles, called (the direct translation is "head of the train"). Their mango milkshake was *excellent*. There's no question in my mind that that was the best mango milkshake I've ever had.

Then we mulled over the possibility of going to the Science Center. I'm not nearly the geek that hanki is so I thought it might be fun to go to his place and play xbox. We played Halo from pretty much 2:30pm til 2:30am. We finished the entire game from beginning to end, playing co-operatively. It was fun!

For those of you wondering, Halo for xbox is exactly the same as Halo for PC.

Hanki's aunt made fried rice without eggs. It was the first time I've had fried rice since that day when I lay sprawling in pain on the canal from having some at Royal Treasures in Ottawa. It was delicious.. I miss fried rice! We also had "Fudgisicle Fury" Chocolate Breyers Ice Cream. Yummy..

rejoice

The best time to thank God and rejoice is when you're down and out. I'm trying to think of places in my life that I can still find some sort of joy.

First, has been Paragon City. Yeah, it's a video game. Yeah, it's a waste of time. In Paragon City I can walk around and beat people up (kills frustration), meet tons of very interesting people (beats loneliness), and build a lot of (albeit virtual) friendships. You meet some pretty different people online, all from various walks of life. Kids, teenagers, moms, dads, grampa, programmers, vp's, etc.. By the way, Americans hate Michael Moore, that is the general consensus I got from about 30 or so americans that I asked last night.

Second, has been at work. I know, it's weird people want to go home to get away from the stress of work, but I go to work to get away from the stress at home. Work has been going great, I had a long chat with my boss today and my future opportunities. God's really been paving the way for me there. Sure it could turn out to be a major disappointment once again, or as us Christian's like to say "life lessons" or "God's will". But at least there's progress. Also great about work is the friendship's I've made there. I feel like I can be pretty open to them because are the same with me.

Third, has been small group. This goes without saying really. Brothers and sisters in Christ who keep me accountable and me them. I am constantly learning from them and it is just awesome, learning from their mistakes, their joys and pains, and observing God's works in their lives. Prayer time is great, sharing, the honesty and great feeling that they really care about me. It's a great feeling to feel wanted and loved.

Fourth, I would say random people that just keep me company. Some of you, you know who you are, have been a real blessing. Just being there and chatting it up with me without having a purpose for it. Maybe you're bored, or you feel the need to chat with someone too. You're not there to ask me for something, or need me to do something, or wondering about something, or talking to me just to be nice. It's great to just sit down and chat with someone for even 15 minutes to catch up, and talk about nothing, or something. Doesn't matter. Thanks.

So those things I definitely have to be greatful for. This has been a great exercise.

I read Luke 1 this morning, and then had it dictated to me using the Bible Gateway's "Listen to this" feature. I didn't really get anything out of the reading.

Lately I have been feeling depressed; unhappy, restless, sad, tired, frustrated. I find that whenever I'm down, I use comedy to try to bring myself back up. Like telling jokes, making people laugh. Hoping that the laughter is contagious and spreads back to me. And if you really listen closely you can tell -- it's a lot of cynical, sarcastic humor. And I've been critical of things I seriously couldn't care less about, trying to provoke frustration from others, being disagreeable.

So on one hand I tried to bounce laughter off others, while on the other hand I tried to spread my downness onto others. If I can't be happy, then make everyone else unhappy. It's selfish.

Life's full of up and downs, and this is just one of the downs. I think all I can do is ride this one out, aside from the usual stuff of praying, reading His word, and going out as much as possible so that I don't sit at home and think too much. Karen's mom told me the other day that I shouldn't let my grandparents stay home too much because it will make them think, which will make them go crazy. I think I'm going crazy..

I have no place I can go to, that will make it all go away..


Edit: Btw, I've decided to go church hopping for the months of July and August. T3C is going through the Purpose Driven Life (btw, if you're interested feel free to attend) and since I've already done it, I find this is the perfect opportunity for me to go off and try something else. And there are a lot of people I haven't seen in a long time and this would be a great opportunity to see them again.

Ha-fay-el Ar-RU-joe

Check out this video. I'm starting to like this kid more and more :)

illuminate

Who is David Crowder? Take a look. He's the one on the right. Funny interview..

I bought David Crowder Band's "Illuminate" cd under the direction of Kevin, who said he was very "impressed" by it. I also go "Touch" by Delirious, it was cheap, just $8.99. Not bad for a double cd. But any, this is my first DCB cd.

After my first time through the cd, I've only got one word to describe it -- wow. This is a great CD. I haven't been through a cd from beginning to end and liked every single song for a very long time. Even MercyMe's Undone, I didn't like that "Caught Up In The Middle" song. But this cd, wow.

What I'm most impressed with it is that they put a lot into each song. The band is very talented with different styles of playing their respective instruments. The songs all sound different but all good. This cd has TONS of bass. They mix tons of stuff into it. There's the usual instruments, but then there's other funky stuff, a lot of play with the electric and altering its tone and distorting it. They have strings too, and even an xylophone! The cd came with a trial of a project they use to mix songs. I haven't tried it yet.

Okay, the only beef I have with the CD is just the order of the compilation. They go from very uplifting songs to very soft, acoustic guitar stuff, but they never go back. I like CDs that are compiled well, and this one just fades out at the end. I guess in some sense depending on your mood this might be more convenient, less skipping around to the type of song you want?

trades galore!

I've never seen trading like this before. We are literally hours away from the draft folks, and even tonight I'm not sure who's going to be taken after the first 4.

For certain, the top 4 are:

1. Dwight Howard
2. Emeka Okafor
3. Luol Deng
4. Shaun Livingston

After that, things get cloudier. Dallas traded for the 5th overall pick. I have no idea what this means.. Dallas doesn't have any glaring needs, the team is stacked. Haha.. no pun intended (they traded for Jerry Stackhouse). Trading for Stackhouse doesn't make sense unless they plan on trading Finley away. Maybe the deal will be Walker, Howard, Finley for Shaq? This is unbelievable.. What is Mark Cuban up to?

I could see them taking a natural point in Devin Harris, and possibly trading him off in part of the deal for Shaq. Or maybe to replace Nash who might bolt? This is just unbelievable.. this Dallas trade totally messes up any of my projections. Here are my guesses:

5. Devin Harris
6. Andre Iguodala
7. Luke Jackson
8. Ben Gordon (haha.. still holding out hope for this)

There's no way Toronto is going to get Ben Gordon. Looks like Pavel Podkolzine to me. Or Andris Biedrins. Or Josh Smith. I can't think of anyone else we could take besides these guys. Raptors are going to trade down tomorrow night, not sure where. They could still get Jameer Nelson down at 12-15. Or trade further down and get Telfair.

blog

I haven't really done the "log" part of blogging lately.. all sports, nothing interesting for most of yous.

My current contract ends on June 30. It's got me kind of thinking about it, just in terms of what would happen if it weren't extended. There's like zero chance of that happening -- no, my faith isn't THAT strong -- but they've slotted me work for next month already. I'm training most of the users for the system.. like 500 people. Who's gonna do that if I'm not around? They need eBrian! The world needs eBrian!

Still, even if they want me back, it's still up to upper management and BUDGETING, that makes the final determination of whether or not I continue. My supervisor discussed with me about a possible job opening sometime in September that I will be able to apply for, Business Analyst (exactly what I've been dreaming about since before I even graduated). He said they'd even make the job descriptions and requirements exactly the same fitted for me and what I have been doing.

Otherwise, not much else going on. I deceived a bunch of people on COH, it's a long story but the gist of it is I lied to them so badly, and did something completely and totally UNTHINKABLE in the gaming world, and I feel so guilty about it that I may never play the game again.

Some good news: My bro is coming to visit me in August, which means we get to go to the MercyMe concert together! I am so excited about that (my bro visiting, not the concert!). I miss him so much.. Btw, he kicked ass on his SATs recently!

Our house is going to be sold officially on the 29th (closing date). It's sad to see it go, but also glad the headaches will be gone, finally.

Anyway.. how's that for a brief update. More to come, as I hear it!

draft

I'm going with Kenric to the draft party at Air Canada Centre on Thursday. We'll get free food and drinks, and possibly meet Chris Bosh. I also want to start a "FIRE PEDDIE" chant, if possible. After last night's Clippers-Bobcats trade I'm a bit disappointed. I don't think the Raptors will get Ben Gordon now. We'll probably end up with Devin Harris, or worse, Biedrins.

That really sucks. Last year Andris Biedrins played against Darko Milicic, "The Human Victory Cigar", and was MASHED. Darko scored like 40 points and 20 rebounds, while Biedrins managed like 4 points and 7 rebounds.

Devin Harris is okay, but.. Actually if Gordon is taken I hope the Raptors just trade down, screwing over the Trailblazers and take Sebastian Telfair, or just trade down for a vet and Jameer Nelson.

Sigh..

poetry

Kenric sent me this site a while ago, I downloaded the songs and they're actually pretty good. I like the song We Miss You.

This song goes out to the innocent men, women and children
Who've lost their lives in the homicide bombings in Israel
Just wanna let you know that who ever you are, where ever you are
Guess what, we miss you

[verse 1]
Days pass by, things won't change
The lives we've lost, memories remain
Locked in our hearts, the friends not here
Our parents, teachers, even school piers
Lives cut short in clubs, cafes
Buses, malls, on them Jewish holidays
Jewin their thing, mindin their own business
Hebrews are peaceful, can I get a witness?
Land of that milk and honey
Spirit valued more than money
Value God and we value love
Now we give our props to the ones above
Miss you daily and it's hard to move on
But you lift our spirit when we hear this song
To all the Heeb crew, let us not forget
They're talking to us now when we hear this set

[verse 2]
We'd like to turn back time
Prevent the loss, prevent the crime
But all we can do is to live the day
Lead tomorrow in our own Jew righteous way
Embrace the Torah, embrace our kin
Somehow we'll overcome and yes we'll win
Cause crimes like these don't go unturned
They'll either change their ways or about to get burned
Tzadikim that's you, the ones above
Died for us, now we're showin you the love
Remind us who we are and what we stand for
Jews rich at heart that's why we're never poor
You each had faith, you each had dreamed
Hoped for peace, even hard as it seemed
But now we praise you and kiss you back
Remember you always when we hear this track

Hillsong United - More To Life

I bought this cd awhile ago, but haven't commented on it.

It's a great CD. I sampled through it prior to the Hillsong United concert I went to, just to familiarize myself with some of the songs so that I could at least attempt to sing along at the concert.

I don't know what it is about Hillsong United that makes me feel so happy. They are the same as Hillsongs, in that the songs are often our offering to God, conveyances of love and appreciation between us and our Holy Savior. The difference being most other songs are "about God", not about our relationship with Him. That think that's what initially attracts anyone to Hillsongs.

I lay my life down at Your feet
You're the only one I need
I turn to You and You are always there
In trouble times, it's you I seek
I put You first that's all I'll need
I humble all I am, all to You

But with Hillsong United, songs are uplifting, and appeal to a younger crowd by lyrics and also by tune. Led by the new generation of the rock-style Christian genre, these group of guys (and 1 girl) are leaders in Christian Praise Rock. They recognize the need that young people have to be able to relate with something before truly believing in something. Hillsong United makes praising God cool -- and fun! Which I think is great..

I don't care what they say about me
It's alright, alright
I don't care what they think about me
It's alright
They'll get it one day

I love You, I'll follow You
You are my, my life
I will read my bible and pray
I will follow you all day

Anyway, I give this CD two thumbs up, a solid 9.5/10. My only (personal) beef with it is that you can easily lose your voice while singing along to it. Especially if you blast it as I do on my car. :)

part 5

Part 5 of Yetisports: Flamingo Drive is out!

ARRRGGGOOOOOOOOOOSSS

Yesterday I went to watch the CFL season opener with Kenric. It was my first experience watching live football, which is far and away my favorite sport to watch. To me, the CFL is a total joke, having players that couldn't make it anywhere else -- a league that made superstars out of NFL failures.

However, the game was actually pretty entertaining. It started out with a bang (literally, lots of fireworks) and the Sasketchewan Roughrider's starting quarterback broke his leg. And from there, it was all downhill for them. The backup guy threw interception after interception. And I called two touchdowns. Just after the injury I told Kenric I thought they would score, and they did, on the ensuing punt. Then later on I said it again, and Damon Allen throws a 50 yard TD.

Here are some pics from the game. I learned some new features with my camera, like what WB stands for (which I forgot by now, though I know the point of it at least).


SkyDome is still quite a sight. Hard to believe people think the Jays need a new stadium!


Pretty good turn out, for a lowly CFL game. Haha.. Actually the fans were really into it, there are a lot of hardcore Argo fans..


Half-time Show: No wardrobe malfunctions tonight! MASS PIPE BAND!


Damon Allen huddles together with the troops. Argos win, 21-10.

hurray for competition!

Today, I received 3 more Gmail invites. I got 3 more last week which I gave to my co-workers, who were drooling over my original invite and my first 2 invites. I felt after rubbing it in their faces it was time to cough them up :)

Anyway, 3 more today, and I sent myself one so I could have a real email address (finally), at brian.yao@gmailREMOVE.com (cut out REMOVE for the real address). <-- I learned my lesson this time, bp!

So yeah, 2 more invites if anyone needs.

And then, I logged into Yahoo mail today to discover they changed their mailbox size to 100 MB, plus their maximum email size is now 10mb! Went on over to Hotmail, and nothing. Uh-oh!

luke jackson

I read this interview between Luke Jackson and one of the writers at DraftCity.com, a week ago. He seemed very intelligent and as a player who stayed in college, seemed very poised and confident. Needless to say I was very impressed by the attitude he displayed, and his tactful answers.

Anyway, why I brought this up, it reminds me of many years ago when I read about the 3 big QBs -- the year of Couch, Culpepper, McNabb (also in that draft was Cade McNown and Akiki Smith). I think it's unfair to think Couch has failed as a QB. Playing for an expansion club has severe downsides because you are always dealing with personnel changes and it literally takes years to establish a good offensive line. Anyway, I remember reading this article about the big 3, and how despite Culpepper being the best athlete of the 3, it was McNabb who scored the highest marks in the aptitude/intelligence tests.

Although McNabb struggled earlier on in his career compared to the massive leaps and bounds Culpepper pulled earlier in his career, we now see McNabb as being the true winner. The guy who is leading his team into the playoffs, and really garnering a lot of MVP support.

Anyway, I just wanted to say this because it just says a lot about intelligence and poise, moreso than pure athletic ability (not that Donovan McNabb isn't an amazing physical specimen). Emeka Okafor finished his college degree in just 3 years, and is projected to go first or second. I'm slowly beginning to think 2nd, simply because Orlando needs to watch their "backs" -- literally, since McGrady also has a history of back problems. Haha.. bad pun. So yeah, Luke Jackson should hit top 12-15 I think.. he's should shoot up the draft boards of teams know what they're doing!

edit: Oh yeah, just wanted to add a blurb about Cade McNown, wherever he is. Cade: You saved me more than a few times in your rookie season. (It's a good thing my league didn't count INTs) I dunno what happened to you, but if you could've shored up your off-field problems you could have had a pretty solid NFL career. Just look at Jake Plummer, he sucks ass and he's still in the league, and you were better than he is.

storm

What a storm last night! There was thunder and lightning, and when it rains, because of the high winds up top, it always sounds like hail. I woke up several times in the middle of the night. It even woke up my gp's at 2 in the morning! I think my grandfather was scared or something.

I woke up this morning to find the Lakers had lost again, but for some reason I still feel like they can win the series. They still haven't played well as a team, yet, in these playoffs. Kenric posed a question to me about whether I thought they were playing poorly because they're distracted, or because I think it's Detroit's defense. I still don't think Detroit is as good as any teams in the West, and the Lakers beat everyone in the West. So do I think it's the defense? I guess part of it is, but still, Kobe has only shot well in one game, which they won. If it's defense, then you just don't get off as many shots. If Kobe is still being allowed to jack up 30 shots in a game, it's more him that the defense.

mercy me

Gladys bought me Word Of God Speak - The Worship Songs of MercyMe as a return favor of getting her tickets to the MercyMe concert. I must say this is a great book! It's got all the chords to a number of mercyme songs including sheet music and lyrics. It's just another reminder of the mistake I made quitting piano when I was younger..

Does anyone know how to play Bb2(no3)?

too much

I'm finding less and less time for myself. Of course it's partly my own fault for getting involved in too many activities, but I just feel like I'm being suffocated right now, never having any time to be alone. I kinda miss living at home with family, even though I hated it, I kinda miss mowing the lawn or vacuuming. Times like those I had all to myself, I would do the chore and think about so many different things while doing them.

Life's seems to be going too fast for me.

lamenting vs. complaining

complaining: Why me? Why are you putting me through this? I can't take this anymore, it's all your fault!

lamenting: Oh man, this really sucks.

onions

Every time I cook, I use onions, and every time I use onions, my hands smell funky afterwards. This smell will often last for days, no matter how much soaking and soaping I do with my hands. It's really annoying.. If anyone knows the remedy for this, please tell me!

rabbits

Some people think I'm just kidding around with the rabbits. I wasn't at the time, but now that I think more about it, it's a lot more work really than one might realize. It's not about a piece of land either, you need a barn most likely. Apparently it's best to have raised cages so that there is no urine build up, it gets collected under the cages. And you need a good ventilation system set up too.

It is however, legal in Canada and there are quite a few rabbit farms in the Northern parts of Canada. Few people know this, but early pioneers ate strictly rabbits, way before they started eating beef, pork or poultry. Rabbit meat is a lot more nutritious that any other of the meats, it's lean and very high in protein.

Anyway, I sure most of my regular readers are more grossed out than interested in this stuff, but if you do have any questions I can pass on some interesting sites and resources -- just email me and ask. In the meantime, I will not be persuing this any further because the initial start-up costs are actually quite a lot more than I had originally anticipated.

this sunday

I've been looking forward to this Sunday for about 3 days now, ever since I decided I was going to and buy some Fanta, something I haven't done since last fall. I love Fanta. There's something about the precious nectar of berry goodness. When you take a gulp, it's like nothing you've ever experienced.. It's just so yummy. Gosh I'm mouth is watering up right now while thinking about it.

potter

I watched Harry Potter 3 yesterday. Liked it a lot. Lots of funny (brilliant!) parts and also scary parts. I can't figure out how old he's supposed to be now though, they seem pretty mature but then you see the way that red-haired kid acts around his pet rat and you think they're like 5 again. Maybe the other two are older and he's much younger but tall? I dunno. It had some really cool storylines and neat effects.

phone

I'm really loving my new phone. Its color screen begs to be looked at, to be fiddled with. Mmm.. pretty colors.. I can't seem to go more than an hour without flipping it open to gaze and the wonderful tones and lights. And everytime I flip it open I can't help but think like I'm some kind of stock broker.. Haha.

more spends

The jedi-master insists that the Hoobastank cd is worth getting, so I'm considering it now. There's a number of CDs that I'm looking to get, secular ones. Creed is one that I should've bought a long time ago. I think I've listened to that one enough times that I should just send them money without even getting a cd.

major purchase

None of the above count as major purchases. I haven't made a major purchase since Christmas time, when I bought my Olympus Stylus 400. Could it be time for a new one? I had one recent mass spending, which was when I paid for the fixing of my basement, which fetched a hefty sum, but I hope to be paid back soon for that. And it doesn't count anyway, I'm talking about purchase for me. ME!

One thing I've thought a lot about was buying a piece of land. And maybe a few cows to breed. I think that'd be a lot of fun, I could go every day after work, make sure they were being well fed, and then go home. In a few years I'd have many cows. I could sell their milk, and eventually sell their flesh, and skin for clothing. It would be good fun.. Or maybe that might take too long.

Perhaps a small patch of land and rabbits. They breed pretty fast and I've read their meat is actually quite delicious. And I could sell their feet.. some crazies out there actually think they bring good luck.

It's definitely something to think about.

Bird: You know the one thing that always bothered me when I was playing in the NBA was, I really got irritated when they put a white guy on me. I still don't understand why.

(laughter)

Bird: A white guy would come out, I would always ask him, 'What, do you have a problem with your coach? Did your coach do this to you?' And he would say, 'No,' and I'd say, 'Come on, you got a white guy coming out here to guard me; you got no chance.' And for some reason, that always bothered me when I was playing against a white guy."

...and he was dead serious, not so much as a grin or anything. Just straight up said it, as though he meant every word. Everyone else (Jim Gray, Magic Johnson, Carmelo Anthony, Lebron James) was laughing, but he was deadpanned. Pretty funny stuff..

Btw, and I pretty much stand by this: If Charlotte takes Iguodala, everything should fall into place and Raptors should get Gordon. I forgot that Washington really likes Childress.. but I also think they need a big man. Anyway, Ben Gordon, if he comes to the Raptors, will win rookie of the year.

Mock Draft

This is my favorite time of the year in the NBA, when the Finals are going on and less that 3 weeks away from the NBA Draft. I absolutely LOVE analysing and trying to predict who will go where, and learning about each of the players. No doubt that this thing will cause many of you to go "HUH?!", or think "gosh, you sure have a lot of time on your hands..."! I really wanted to put this in a table format, but this will have to do for now.

1. Orlando: Emeka Okafor - This is really a no-brainer. Back spasms and all he is hands down the best player in the draft.
2. Atlanta: Dwight Howard - Atlanta will trade up to take this hometown highschool phenom, who looks to be like a cross between a Tim Duncan and a Kevin Garnett (ie: a mean Duncan with ball-handling skills).
3. Chicago: Luol Deng - To me he's the consensus #3 pick. Chicago is basically set at PF/C with Chandler/Curry or will be, after trading one of them. Don't forget they also still have AD.
4. Charlotte: Andre Iguodala - Iguodala has been shooting up the charts after his latest workout. He is an extremely well-conditioned athlete with great skills and can literally do it all out on the court, and is the perfect type of player for the new franchise to build around.
5. Washington: Andris Biedrins - Kwame Brown is done.
6. Clippers: Shaun Livingston - Here's where it gets tricky. LAC trades down to take a point guard? I know it's wishful thinking that they'd pass on Gordon but it does make sense as they want a kid who will pass first, given that they already have established scorers on their team..
7. Phoenix: Pavel Podkolzine - Pavel should have declared last year, he wasted an entire season in the Italian league and basically did nothing in the past year. He could have been raking it in all this time. If he pans out, he and Amare Stoudamire will make a formidable frontcourt for the Suns.
8. Toronto: Ben Gordon - Ben Gordon is the next Baron Davis. Yes, you heard it here first. This guy has Baron Davis written all over him. They're both BIG guards, love to shoot first and are ridiculed for being somewhat of a ball hog. They both play great defense, and are lethal from 3-pt range. The game comes naturally for both of them.
9. Philadelphia: Josh Smith - Just makes sense to take this guy who for now will supplant Glenn Robinson, but in the future will we asked to score instead of Iverson.
10. Cleveland: Josh Childress - Cleveland is just looking for grounded players who have a solid game so as to not ruin the already great chemistry on this team. Childress was the leader of his Stanford squad and is a fairly mature player, despite what you might think when you see his hair.
11. Golden State: Kirk Snyder - Really at this point I could care less about who gets taken. I see that the Warriors need a SG/SF and to me it's down to Kirk, Luke Jackson, Sergei Monya.. so take your pick.
12. Seattle: Peter John Ramos - Ramos is another one of those tall kids who has shot up the rankings, really for no good reason other than he is an okay player who happens to be really tall. With Calvin Booth as their only legitimate C, Ramos just makes sense.
13. Portland: Devin Harris - It's hard to believe Harris falling this far but I am basing this edition of my mock draft on need, and none of the above teams after Toronto really needs a point guard. It would've been Telfair here but that dude is dropping like a brick after recent workouts.
14. Utah: Dorell Wright - This one comes out from left field. A highschooler, virtually unknown. He will be at the slam dunk competition, if he gets drafted and gets 10-15 minutes per game. If there's a human highlight reel in this draft class, it's him. Utah needs that kind of player, to attract the fans. I mean sure Kirilenko is no slouch, but wait til you see this kid dunk..!
15. Boston: Jameer Nelson - I think Boston would have wanted Wright, or they might take JR Smith here. It's really unfair that a player like Jameer Nelson gets overlooked in the draft. He's really a great leader and in terms of floor generals he is the best in this class -- but he's tiny. I think he'd mesh really well with Mr. "Heart on his sleeve" Paul Pierce.

Other notables: Utah takes Swift, LAC takes Araujo, NOH takes Jackson, Miami gambles on Telfair, Nuggets take JR Smith.

I've revised this thing about 40 times in the last 3 days and I think it might stand. Of course workouts are still going on, teams cut deals with kids and rumors fly, and so this is a "mock" draft in every sense of the word.

IF Toronto gets Ben Gordon, we will be contenders in the East once again. Babcock has seen first hand what a different a scoring point guard can make with Cassell in Minnesota. I mean basically you're getting Cassell and Hudson in one player. I can't see how Babcock could pass on him if he's there.

flames, lightning

I haven't really commented much about the Stanley Cup Finals, with good reason -- I haven't watched a single game yet. But tonight I plan on watching Game 7. I know that a lot of you are cheering for the Calgary Flames, and rightfully so as they are "Canada's" team this year, and we finally have a shot at bringing the Cup home.

Although I guess I'll be cheering for Calgary since Jarome Iginla is one of my favorite non-Leaf players, I'll be equally happy for either team winning it.

The Tampa Bay Lightning are full of Canadian players, including their best player Martin St.Louis, Vincent Lecavalier, and a player who is quite dear to my heart -- former Toronto Maple Leaf, Dave Andreychuk.

Dave Andreychuk was a part of what I consider the glory years, the days of Doug Gilmour. Those years we had the closest shot at reaching the Stanley Cup finals out of any of the past few Sundin-led years. If you really think about it, the only real highlight in the last 5 years has been eliminating Ottawa -- outside of that we have had little or no chance of making it to the Finals.

Andreychuk was awesome for us.. He's 40 years old now, and looking for his first Cup. He holds a dubious record for playing the most NHL games without winning a Stanley Cup. He's the Karl Malone of hockey.

So anyway, like I said, between seeing Jarome Iginla hoist the cup and Dave Andreychuk, either is good for me -- although Jarome probably has a shot for many years to come, while Andreychuk is probably done after this season.

idiot

like the idiot that i am, i forgot to pay my credit card bill for like the umpteenth time, and this time i have to really pay for it.

my free month's subscription ended this weekend for City of Heroes, and I was supposed to start paying today in order to pay ($20/month). But, as I mentioned this idiot forgot to pay his credit card overdue bills -- which was like a paltry $14 -- and now I won't get to play for at least another 3-5 days!

CRIPES!!

of course this means my guitar practicing will benefit greatly..

btw, thanks to jasy: i stole your code and altered it so that i could show 3 at once.. hehe. finally made use of my degree :)

more heroes

A few days ago I stopped working on Lion-Oh and made a guy who looks like a tiny monkey. I wanted to called him Curious George, but the game wouldn't let me use the word "Curious". (At level 15 you get a new title, like "The Amazing" or "The Extraordinary", etc. And I think "Curious" might be one of the choices.) So anyway, I went with Kyrios George, giving somewhat of a double meaning as our church's teen fellowship is called Kyrios.

Kyrios George is an illusion controller / healer. I run around and get into trouble, and try to bail out other people in need. It's pretty fun, very different game dynamic than going in and arresting (killing) everything in sight as I was with Lion-Oh, who was a spines scrapper. Now I manipulate the enemy into attacking themselves, or healing and revive fellow heroes in the city. It's actually quite fun being an 'assister' rather than the offense.

Here's a few more funny pics I took along my travels:


I played with Annie for only around 15 minutes while I tried to level up. She was funny though, kept yelling "Tomorrow!" after every arrest.


This guy was great, didn't play with him but saw him hanging around City Hall. He was doing jumping jacks at one point, and yelling out "YMCA!" over and over. LOL!!

hoobastank

The first time I heard this song "The Reason" was months ago during a highlight reel on Roger's Sportsnet. They played the song while showing hockey highlights and then I found myself humming it hours later. Had no idea who sang it, or what the song was about.

Then recently while flipping through the stations I saw the music video, realized what it was about (weird how the lyrics are so different from the video). I really like this song, it's got a great tune, guitar solo part sounds easy enough that I might be able to play. Lyrics are nice.

Anyway.. it took me like 2 weeks to figure out the name of the group. Hoobastank.. what the heck is that?


Oh yeah, today I picked up a new cell phone, trading in my beloved T206 for an LG 6070. The T206 is, in my mind, still the best phone ever offered by Telus. It's large and bulky, looks like a women's phone, but the reception is better than any phone I have ever used, often comparable to my cordless phone at home. You will be missed, T206.

eBrian's brush with stardom, PART II

Well, it all started after work.. No seriously, today as I was putting on my jacket to get ready to go home I looked out the window and noticed they were filming something out in front of Metro Hall. So I made a point to walk outside to the subway station in order to see what was going on.

Outside, they were filming something, there was a Lincoln parked there, with a camera, and a whole bunch of white screens. There were two of those cool 'actors' chairs. There was this woman dressed in a red blazer/skirt thing with tall lace boots. She was pretty. I stared for awhile before I realized it was Heather Graham. I was kinda surprised actually how pretty she was, before I remembered she was probably all done up for the movie and hence, seeing some movie star "in person" was still the same as seeing them on the big screen -- if they were working.

Anyway, we were all standing around, us Torontonians until the director told us to move out of the way because he didn't want us in the film. So a group of them (comprised mostly of young teenage girls), moved out of the way and I started walking towards the subway.

Then I remembered akt works right there too so I called her to tell her what was going on. And then I called a co-worker who was still upstairs.

Later I heard that they were filling a movie called "Cake", and apparently Sandra Oh was in it too (although I may have heard that incorrectly).

Exciting stuff!

Misadventures of eBrian

Misadventures of eBrian

So there I was, lying on the side of the road when I woke up from my daily nap on the subway after work. Many thoughts sprang into my mind. Is this a dream? Where am I? How did I get here? I stood up and realized that everything had been taken from me. I'd been robbed, (everything was gone except my keys), probably while I was lying there, or maybe they robbed me and then just left me on the side of the road to die. I don't know. I had nothing left..

I'm not exactly sure what happened next but I sort of just started stumbling along the side of the road. Cars whizzed by and didn't seem to even notice me, I just sorta walked along the side, unsure of whether to stick my thumb out or just keep walking. Tripped on something and fell, and then when I woke up again I was lying in some sort of a puddle or something, no longer near the street. It wasn't blood or anything like that.. nor sewage. But it stunk pretty bad.

Some funny looking old guy was standing over me asking if I need help. I think mumbled to him that I was fine (he looked kinda freaky), and he kind of stood there looking at me funny, shrugged, and walked away.

When I got up it must've been really late, it was all dark outside but I could sort of make out the CN Tower off in the distance so I started walking in that direction. I guess you could say I started walking towards the light (lol).

At that point I started to vaguely remembered what had happened to me between the time I fell and the time the old man was over me. I had noticed that I was fairly unscathed and started running, climbed over a fence, and generally felt pretty good about myself that I'd survived getting robbed and abandoned. But then I tripped on some mangled pieces of a muffler or something, and I slid off into a ravine area. I also remembered being carried some place, by a couple or group of people, all dressed in white. It could've been a dream but I doubt it.. you don't just come up with stuff like that out of the blue!

Anyway.. I wandered for what felt like an eternity but eventually found my way into some neighborhood, found a taxi driver who took pity on me and drove me home. When I got home, I snuck in to make sure I didn't wake my grandparents, went straight to the washroom and showered. I thought about calling the police but I figured what was the point? So i called Visa instead, cancelled my credit card, and called my bank to freeze my accounts. And here I am blogging again, after all that craziness.

I guess thinking back on the whole thing, it was pretty crazy.. I mean sure my story is entirely fiction. Well, metaphorically it sort of describes my ride from the past week. But the bottom line is I'm back. Maybe not at full strength, but I'm back nonetheless. Please continue to check both blogs though, as I do intend on continuing on with both, more likely the other one, and leaving silly things and venting on this one.

As someone very wise once told me, you can't always be serious and you can't always be humorous, otherise you lose your audience.